At Some Age This is No Longer Going to Be Funny

Chase and Julian reading the SI Swimsuit issue

This is Why Julian Has to Wait a Few More Years

I started a policy with my children to wait until they are 5 years old before taking them a major sporting event. Mostly because I want the first game to special, I don't want to waste money on a kid who won't enjoy it and I don't want to go to a game with a kid who won't sit still.
Now there's a new reason:



Turns out this kid was part of an on-court promotion set to take place during the timeout. But he got excited and ran on the court too early.

And a brilliant SIIJ reference!

Happy Valentine's Day

Jim Boeheim Acts Like a Dick

This isn't exactly breaking news because Jim Boeheim has been doing this for years. Because of his success and his position at the University he feels he can say and do anything he wants with no repercussions. He can make a knee-jerk statement about child molestation accusations and get away with it, and now he insulted a reporter, ESPN's Andy Katz, after Syracuse's loss to Connecticut.



It's not 100% clear what Boeheim was angry about. It's possible this dates back to Katz's reporting on the Bernie Fine scandal. But here's a theory I tend to believe. It comes from Katz's report on James Southerland's suspension.
In the first half Katz reported that Southerland's academic issue was regarding "two paragraphs" in a paper. At the time I discussed this with Billy, and we both thought it seemed implausible that an issue that minor could have taken 6 weeks to resolve.
Maybe Southerland lied to Katz, knowing the University would likely not refute his statement (to protect his privacy), maybe someone else did, or maybe Katz's source told him the truth. Either way, it's possible Boeheim did not wish Katz to share that information. Maybe he didn't think Katz should have been pumping JaySouth for info, maybe he thought the conversation was off the record. Not sure exactly how that might have played out, but it seems third most likely reason for him to be angry, with the first two being they lost and that Boeheim is just a dick.

Coolest Winner in Jeopardy History

Leonard Cooper is now the coolest winner in Jeopardy history. Granted, there isn't a lot of competition for that title but Cooper won the teen tournament with an impressive amount of flair and bravado.



First of all, he absolutely did the right thing risking it all on that Daily Double. It was an all-or-nothing move, but he'd have to do one on final Jeopardy anyway, and this clue was likely to be easier.
Second, his victory of the $75,000 was not a sure thing. The other kid could have gotten it right and wagered enough to beat him, coupling in his huge advantage from the previous show.
Third, Chase might have known that first answer. When I was teaching him eyes, ears, nose, etc., I also taught him where his clavicle is. For Julian, I did sternum. Funny parlor trick.

Song of the Week

"Fire We Make" - Alicia Keys featuring Maxwell
I love a good male/female duet and this is two of the best voices out there right now. It has a soulful melody, like something the Isleys might have done in 1977.
Really loving this jam right now.

I Bet He Gets That a Lot

One time, in a class in college, two groups were doing a package on crime on Marshall Street, both groups interviewed the same t-shirt store employee. But in their packages, they called him two different names. One was the correct name, one was a made-up name they conjured because they had forgotten to ask his real name.
Similarly, as I have pointed out before on this blog, the 1996 Susan Wagner High School Yearbook misidentified several girls as NHL players, because VinJuice loves hockey and forgot to go back and get their correct names.
I could have sworn the same thing had happened when I watched a special about the NFL. A bald man identifed as the NFL Director of Programming Digital Media (sounds like a made-up title) was named as Tom Brady.

Surely, the producers had forgotten to get his name, inserted Tom Brady to hold the space and never went back to change it. But I Googled it, and came up with Tom Brady, Vice President, Programming & Production, NFL Media (a more believable title). He even had his own LinkedIn account.

That seems like an impossible coincidence, but I guess Tom Brady is just a more common name than I thought.

Which Head? Yours!

Kate Upton and her ridiculously large breasts are gracing the cover of the Sports Illustrated Swimsuit issue for the second year in a row.

If Anyone Can Make Doug Gottlieb Tolerable

Doug Gottlieb, former Oklahoma State point guard, full-time Syracuse hater is in love with the sound of his own voice. Which means he probably loves his new show, "Lead Off" on CBS Sports Network. Basic premise: the host throws out a topic and Gottlieb rants on it for about a minute. Sounds terrible, right?
But the host, is Allie LaForce, the incredibly hot, incredibly young (24) former Miss Teen USA.
I watched one episode of this show and it seemed ok. Gottlieb is tolerable in small doses and LaForce is not just hot, she has some good things to say. The show definitely has potential, especially if LaForce develops more of her own voice to combat Gottlieb, the way Michelle Beadle became beloved for shutting down that dweeb Colin Cowherd on SportsNation.

WARNING: LaForce was only 15 in this bikini picture!

One disturbing thing about Allie LaForce though: she is fucking Joe Smith. Not the cool Joe Smith, from the University of Maryland. The mediocre Joe Smith who used to pitch for the Mets and now plays for the Cleveland Indians. One time Smith got into a tussle at a bar, and LaForce's relative (brother?) ended up getting handcuffed as a result. And she's still with him. Smith will make $3m this season which I'm sure is a turn-on for a girl like LaForce, though if this show takes off she'll be able to buy her own red-soled shoes. Not sure why she needs this junkballer in her life but maybe what they have is real.