Sheryl Crow's Dirty Cooch

Sheryl Crow has a solution to global warming, but it might result in yeast infections.

She proposes a limit on toilet paper.

"I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting...we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required."

I like to use as much as needed to get the job done. Then three more squares just to make sure.

But maybe Sheryl Crow has a bidet. Or a servant with a warm bottle of water and a soft sponge.