The sweetest moement of the NFL season so far came when Buffalo Bills wide receiver caught a touchdown pass against the Dallas Cowboys and ran around the field to give the ball to his girlfriend, Kelsi Reisch, a smoking hot Cowboys cheerleader.
Nelson is from Texas and has been dating Reisch for 4 years. There are rules against the fraternization of cheerleaders and players, but they don't seem to apply to different teams. Those rules are a complete joke anyway because no gold-digging hottie would be deterred from fucking a player by the threat of losing her $50 a game job.
We hope Kelsi and Nelson are very happy together.
Please join the ESPN tournament challenge group. The Poop, as always. Vote early and often. Do one for the kiddies, one for the wife, one for the family dog.
Saturday, November 19, 2011
Friday, November 18, 2011
A Fine Mess
Syracuse assistant basketball coach Bernie Fine is the latest coach to be accused of sexually molesting a child.
A former Syracuse ball boy named Bobby Davis, 39, has come forward and said Fine molested him hundreds of times between when he was 11 and 27.
Davis said he met Fine in 1983 when he was selling candy door-to-door in his neighborhood. Davis lived in a single-parent household. He says Fine took him under his wing, leading to him becoming a ball boy and traveling with the team, even to the 1987 Final Four.
Davis came forward with his claims to ESPN in 2003. They interviewed him but couldn't get anyone else to back up his story so they never aired the story. Davis also went to Syracuse Police who told him the statute of limitations had expired. He also went to Syracuse University. The University investigated for four months. They interviewed several people including four people Davis said would corroborate his story. None of them did so SU dropped the matter.
Now Davis's step-brother, Mike Lang, 45, is coming forward with similar allegations about Fine. And that is why ESPN is airing the story.
Lang says he was emboldened to come forward now because of the Penn State situation.
I guess those allegations make these a little easier to believe.
But that could cut both ways, they're more likely to be believed if they're telling the truth, but also if this were a plot, they'd be more likely to be believed in that case as well.
I'm not sure I believe them. I think it's very possible this happened, or something similar. But also relative to Penn State, there is a much greater chance this is completely false.
Jim Boeheim, whom Davis claims say him in Bernie Fine's hotel room, clearly does not believe these allegations:
"I know this kid, but I never saw him in any rooms or anything. It is a bunch of a thousand lies that he has told. You don't think it is a little funny that his cousin (relative) is coming forward? He supplied four names to the university that would corroborate his story. None of them did. There is only one side to this story. He is lying."
I understand why Boeheim is protecting his friend, but I think that tone is a little too harsh.
I think the University is doing a much better job. They took a serious look at this in 2005 and found nothing, and are taking a serious look again. Bernie Fine has been placed on administrative leave.
I hope this doesn't turn into another Penn State and ruin my alma mater too. But if it does I will advocate the same punishment: death to the perpetrator, prison for those who covered it up and a punch in the face for the students dumb enough to riot over it.
A former Syracuse ball boy named Bobby Davis, 39, has come forward and said Fine molested him hundreds of times between when he was 11 and 27.
Davis said he met Fine in 1983 when he was selling candy door-to-door in his neighborhood. Davis lived in a single-parent household. He says Fine took him under his wing, leading to him becoming a ball boy and traveling with the team, even to the 1987 Final Four.
Davis came forward with his claims to ESPN in 2003. They interviewed him but couldn't get anyone else to back up his story so they never aired the story. Davis also went to Syracuse Police who told him the statute of limitations had expired. He also went to Syracuse University. The University investigated for four months. They interviewed several people including four people Davis said would corroborate his story. None of them did so SU dropped the matter.
Now Davis's step-brother, Mike Lang, 45, is coming forward with similar allegations about Fine. And that is why ESPN is airing the story.
Lang says he was emboldened to come forward now because of the Penn State situation.
I guess those allegations make these a little easier to believe.
But that could cut both ways, they're more likely to be believed if they're telling the truth, but also if this were a plot, they'd be more likely to be believed in that case as well.
I'm not sure I believe them. I think it's very possible this happened, or something similar. But also relative to Penn State, there is a much greater chance this is completely false.
Jim Boeheim, whom Davis claims say him in Bernie Fine's hotel room, clearly does not believe these allegations:
"I know this kid, but I never saw him in any rooms or anything. It is a bunch of a thousand lies that he has told. You don't think it is a little funny that his cousin (relative) is coming forward? He supplied four names to the university that would corroborate his story. None of them did. There is only one side to this story. He is lying."
I understand why Boeheim is protecting his friend, but I think that tone is a little too harsh.
I think the University is doing a much better job. They took a serious look at this in 2005 and found nothing, and are taking a serious look again. Bernie Fine has been placed on administrative leave.
I hope this doesn't turn into another Penn State and ruin my alma mater too. But if it does I will advocate the same punishment: death to the perpetrator, prison for those who covered it up and a punch in the face for the students dumb enough to riot over it.
Thursday, November 17, 2011
Weekly Picks
Things have not been going well lately for your hero. Not only did I have a horrible week last week, most of my teams got blown out and weren't even close to covering the spreads. If not for Green Bay I would have suffered my first minus-1 in a very long time. Making my picks early this week to change my luck.
oakland -1 MINNESOTA
Possible Carson Palmer is back as a real quarterback? The Vikings don't need to be as bad as they were on Monday. All I need them to do is lose.
buffalo +2 MIAMI
What happened to the Bills? Could the Dolphins really win 3 in a row?
CHICAGO -3 1/2 san diego
The Chargers start their annual late season run next week. The Bears are looking good too. Almost like a real team.
kansas city +14 1/2 NEW ENGLAND
I'm just rolling the dice this one. I know Tyler Palko is starting, but I'm not all that worried about New England's defense. I think he can put enough points on the board (maybe 17 will be enough). The Chiefs defense isn't bad. As long as KC doesn't turn it over a bunch this game should be closer than 14.
BEST BET
new york jets -6 1/2 DENVER
The spread on this one has skyrocketed two points since I first decided to pick it. But I like the Jets coming off a rough loss and the Broncos off a big win. The Tebow thing has to end at some point, it's just not sustainable. And I think the Jets are just the defense to force him into doing things he doesn't want to do -- like throwing the ball.
Last week: 1-4 (0 points)
Season: 24-26 (24 points)
Best Bets: 0-1 (5-5)
Home Favorites: 1-2 (11-13)
Home Underdogs: 0-1 (0-1)
Road Favorites: 0-0 (6-6)
Road Underdogs: 0-1 (7-6)
oakland -1 MINNESOTA
Possible Carson Palmer is back as a real quarterback? The Vikings don't need to be as bad as they were on Monday. All I need them to do is lose.
buffalo +2 MIAMI
What happened to the Bills? Could the Dolphins really win 3 in a row?
CHICAGO -3 1/2 san diego
The Chargers start their annual late season run next week. The Bears are looking good too. Almost like a real team.
kansas city +14 1/2 NEW ENGLAND
I'm just rolling the dice this one. I know Tyler Palko is starting, but I'm not all that worried about New England's defense. I think he can put enough points on the board (maybe 17 will be enough). The Chiefs defense isn't bad. As long as KC doesn't turn it over a bunch this game should be closer than 14.
BEST BET
new york jets -6 1/2 DENVER
The spread on this one has skyrocketed two points since I first decided to pick it. But I like the Jets coming off a rough loss and the Broncos off a big win. The Tebow thing has to end at some point, it's just not sustainable. And I think the Jets are just the defense to force him into doing things he doesn't want to do -- like throwing the ball.
Last week: 1-4 (0 points)
Season: 24-26 (24 points)
Best Bets: 0-1 (5-5)
Home Favorites: 1-2 (11-13)
Home Underdogs: 0-1 (0-1)
Road Favorites: 0-0 (6-6)
Road Underdogs: 0-1 (7-6)
Paterno's House
Joe Paterno transferred full ownership of his house to his wife sue for $1 back in July, four months before the Sandusky scandal broke.
I bring this up not because I think Paterno was trying to avoid the consequences of a civil suit against him -- that's too much of a stretch.
I'm sure this was just part of his estate planning for his impending death.
I'm more interested in the real aspect of it.
The Paternos bought the house for $58,000 in 1969. A pretty hefty sum in those days. The fair-market value of the house currently is $595,000. Which ihttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifs a very nice house, especially in State College. The average home value there is $202,000 according to the latest Coldwell Banker survey of home prices in college football towns.
It's actually kind of quaint that the Paternos never upgraded to a nicer house, even though they could have.
But here's what some experts the New York Times interviewed about the transaction said:
Lawrence A. Frolik, a law professor at the University of Pittsburgh who specializes in elder law, said that he had “never heard” of a husband selling his share of a house for $1 to his spouse for tax or government assistance purposes.
“I can’t see any tax advantages,” Frolik said. “If someone told me that, my reaction would be, ‘Are they hoping to shield assets in case if there’s personal liability?’ ” He added, “It sounds like an attempt to avoid personal liability in having assets in his wife’s name.”
Two lawyers examined the available documents in recent days. Neither wanted to be identified because they were not directly involved in the case or the property transaction. One of the experts said it appeared to be an explicit effort to financially shield Joe Paterno. The other regarded the July transaction, at least on its face, as benign.
So it remains to be seen how this house, the site of the disgusting riots by Penn State students, continues to play a role in this unseemly scandal.
I bring this up not because I think Paterno was trying to avoid the consequences of a civil suit against him -- that's too much of a stretch.
I'm sure this was just part of his estate planning for his impending death.
I'm more interested in the real aspect of it.
The Paternos bought the house for $58,000 in 1969. A pretty hefty sum in those days. The fair-market value of the house currently is $595,000. Which ihttp://www.blogger.com/img/blank.gifs a very nice house, especially in State College. The average home value there is $202,000 according to the latest Coldwell Banker survey of home prices in college football towns.
It's actually kind of quaint that the Paternos never upgraded to a nicer house, even though they could have.
But here's what some experts the New York Times interviewed about the transaction said:
Lawrence A. Frolik, a law professor at the University of Pittsburgh who specializes in elder law, said that he had “never heard” of a husband selling his share of a house for $1 to his spouse for tax or government assistance purposes.
“I can’t see any tax advantages,” Frolik said. “If someone told me that, my reaction would be, ‘Are they hoping to shield assets in case if there’s personal liability?’ ” He added, “It sounds like an attempt to avoid personal liability in having assets in his wife’s name.”
Two lawyers examined the available documents in recent days. Neither wanted to be identified because they were not directly involved in the case or the property transaction. One of the experts said it appeared to be an explicit effort to financially shield Joe Paterno. The other regarded the July transaction, at least on its face, as benign.
So it remains to be seen how this house, the site of the disgusting riots by Penn State students, continues to play a role in this unseemly scandal.
Another Cool Tradition
We know everyone loves the serial photographs tentatively titled "Looking out the Door in Maine" , but there is also another series of pictures we've been taking. Each year at Halloween at Demarest Farms in front of the "How Tall This Fall?" sign.
Wednesday, November 16, 2011
Song of the Week
"All for You" - Sister Hazel
This one was huge sophomore year of college. I am old.
This one was huge sophomore year of college. I am old.
Tuesday, November 15, 2011
The NFL is Poop - Week 10
Winning Isn't Everything, It's the Only Thing
How do you win a game when you have only two complete passes? Just ask the Denver Broncos. Tim Tebow went 2 for 8 for 69 yards and a touchdown. Amazingly that is a 102 passer rating. The Broncos ran a version of a college option and it worked. 55 runs, 8 pass attempts. And a win. In fact, the Broncos are 3-1 with Tebow as the starting quarterback. But I still insist this can't last forever. Teams will either figure out how to stop it or Tebow will get hurt. Or Tebow will get hurt because teams figure out how to stop it.
He Who Passes Most, Loses
Despite calls that the NFL is now a passing league, Tebow points out an interesting trend. In every single game this weekend, except one (Eagles-Cardinals), the team that had fewer pass attempts won the game.
Note: Patriots and Jets both attempted 39 passes.
There were a few big blowouts where passing teams like the Texans and Packers didn't need to attempt a lot of passes. But for the most part I think this is a trend every week. You have to pass to get ahead, but you have to run to stay ahead.
Onions!
For years I have been calling for coaches to be more aggressive on 4th and short situations but Atlanta's Mike Smith took it too far. For any gamble you need to evaluate the risk and the reward and the likelihood of each. With 4th and 1 at his own 29-yard line, Smith decided to go for it. He missed and the Saints won. The reason this was so bad is because the risk was so great (turn it over there and it's almost a guaranteed loss) and the reward so minimal (still a long way to go to win the game). Aggressive, but foolish gamble by Smith.
Is It Too Early?
The Green Bay Packers are almost halfway there, so it seems like a good time to review their chances for a perfect season. I definitely see the Packers rolling over the ExpensiveCornPrices this week, setting up a matchup against the Lions on Thanksgiving Day. If they get through that they have the Giants Raiders and Chiefs. If they get to 14-0, they will likely have clinched home field (unless Niners are 13-1). And that's where the problem starts. The last two games are home games, but they're against Chicago and Detroit. Two good teams, who will likely have a hell of a lot more to play for than Green Bay will. So enjoy the Thanksgiving Day game, but don't count on a perfect season.
Brief Rant About the Redskins
John Beck couldn't move the offense. Rex Grossman moves the offense, then turns it over. They are just atrocious right now, they cannot score touchdowns. Five field goal attempts. In the last 3 games, the Redskins have 1 touchdown, and it was in garbage time against San Fran. And rookie wide receiver Leonard Hankerson, the lone bright spot, had 106 yards, then got hurt and is out for the season. 3-13 is a definite possibility.
Picture of the Week
Another one of my favorite underrated players is Bengals defensive lineman Domata Peko. Here he is sacking Ben Roethlisberger. If not for Troy Polamalu, Peko would have the Head and Shoulders endorsement. Also, look at Ben Roethlisberger's left shoe. That detail takes a good picture and makes it awesome.
If the Super Bowl Were Played Today
Green Bay Packers 45 Pittsburgh Steelers 7
I really can't figure out the AFC. There are no really good teams. I honestly feel like the Chargers have another late season run in them and by late Decemeber they could be in this space.
How do you win a game when you have only two complete passes? Just ask the Denver Broncos. Tim Tebow went 2 for 8 for 69 yards and a touchdown. Amazingly that is a 102 passer rating. The Broncos ran a version of a college option and it worked. 55 runs, 8 pass attempts. And a win. In fact, the Broncos are 3-1 with Tebow as the starting quarterback. But I still insist this can't last forever. Teams will either figure out how to stop it or Tebow will get hurt. Or Tebow will get hurt because teams figure out how to stop it.
He Who Passes Most, Loses
Despite calls that the NFL is now a passing league, Tebow points out an interesting trend. In every single game this weekend, except one (Eagles-Cardinals), the team that had fewer pass attempts won the game.
Note: Patriots and Jets both attempted 39 passes.
There were a few big blowouts where passing teams like the Texans and Packers didn't need to attempt a lot of passes. But for the most part I think this is a trend every week. You have to pass to get ahead, but you have to run to stay ahead.
Onions!
For years I have been calling for coaches to be more aggressive on 4th and short situations but Atlanta's Mike Smith took it too far. For any gamble you need to evaluate the risk and the reward and the likelihood of each. With 4th and 1 at his own 29-yard line, Smith decided to go for it. He missed and the Saints won. The reason this was so bad is because the risk was so great (turn it over there and it's almost a guaranteed loss) and the reward so minimal (still a long way to go to win the game). Aggressive, but foolish gamble by Smith.
Is It Too Early?
The Green Bay Packers are almost halfway there, so it seems like a good time to review their chances for a perfect season. I definitely see the Packers rolling over the ExpensiveCornPrices this week, setting up a matchup against the Lions on Thanksgiving Day. If they get through that they have the Giants Raiders and Chiefs. If they get to 14-0, they will likely have clinched home field (unless Niners are 13-1). And that's where the problem starts. The last two games are home games, but they're against Chicago and Detroit. Two good teams, who will likely have a hell of a lot more to play for than Green Bay will. So enjoy the Thanksgiving Day game, but don't count on a perfect season.
Brief Rant About the Redskins
John Beck couldn't move the offense. Rex Grossman moves the offense, then turns it over. They are just atrocious right now, they cannot score touchdowns. Five field goal attempts. In the last 3 games, the Redskins have 1 touchdown, and it was in garbage time against San Fran. And rookie wide receiver Leonard Hankerson, the lone bright spot, had 106 yards, then got hurt and is out for the season. 3-13 is a definite possibility.
Picture of the Week
Another one of my favorite underrated players is Bengals defensive lineman Domata Peko. Here he is sacking Ben Roethlisberger. If not for Troy Polamalu, Peko would have the Head and Shoulders endorsement. Also, look at Ben Roethlisberger's left shoe. That detail takes a good picture and makes it awesome.
If the Super Bowl Were Played Today
Green Bay Packers 45 Pittsburgh Steelers 7
I really can't figure out the AFC. There are no really good teams. I honestly feel like the Chargers have another late season run in them and by late Decemeber they could be in this space.
Monday, November 14, 2011
I'm a Douche
I am addicted to my Blackberry and I can't possibly imagine going a day without it. That's why I climbed to the top level of the parking garage to retrieve it when I left it in the car.
When I get in the elevator to leave each day I check to make sure I have it. The other day I checked 3 pockets (left pants, left jacket, inside jacket) and couldn't find it. So I stepped out of the elevator, right before the doors closed. Then I put my hand in my right jacket pocket and found my blackberry. So I stepped back on the elevator, right before the doors closed.
Maybe this isn't soooooo douchey but I haven't posted one of these in 3 years (it can't be for lack of doing douchey things, can it?) so I thought I was due.
Plus I'm pretty sure the guy who was in the elevator waiting to go downstairs thought it was pretty douchey.
When I get in the elevator to leave each day I check to make sure I have it. The other day I checked 3 pockets (left pants, left jacket, inside jacket) and couldn't find it. So I stepped out of the elevator, right before the doors closed. Then I put my hand in my right jacket pocket and found my blackberry. So I stepped back on the elevator, right before the doors closed.
Maybe this isn't soooooo douchey but I haven't posted one of these in 3 years (it can't be for lack of doing douchey things, can it?) so I thought I was due.
Plus I'm pretty sure the guy who was in the elevator waiting to go downstairs thought it was pretty douchey.
The Best Penn State/Sandusky Jokes
At Penn State you can now major in minors.
An older woman who goes after young men is a cougar. An older man who goes after young boys is a Nittany Lion.
The Penn State Creamery discontinued the Jerry Sandusky ice cream flavor. It was banana with whipped cream and a smear of chocolate.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how old is Sandusky's boyfriend?
Say what you want about Jerry Sandusky, but he always drives slowly through a school zone.
One time Jerry Sandusky was on a plane full of kids from his Second Mile charity. The pilot said the plane was going to crash. Sandusky said "we have to save the children." Someone else said "fuck the children." Sandusky replied "do you think we have the time?"
Jerry Sandusky was always the first one ready to leave the team hotel the morning after road games. He had his shit packed the night before.
Thanks to Golzilla, Albino and JLeary for their contributions.
An older woman who goes after young men is a cougar. An older man who goes after young boys is a Nittany Lion.
The Penn State Creamery discontinued the Jerry Sandusky ice cream flavor. It was banana with whipped cream and a smear of chocolate.
On a scale of 1 to 10, how old is Sandusky's boyfriend?
Say what you want about Jerry Sandusky, but he always drives slowly through a school zone.
One time Jerry Sandusky was on a plane full of kids from his Second Mile charity. The pilot said the plane was going to crash. Sandusky said "we have to save the children." Someone else said "fuck the children." Sandusky replied "do you think we have the time?"
Jerry Sandusky was always the first one ready to leave the team hotel the morning after road games. He had his shit packed the night before.
Thanks to Golzilla, Albino and JLeary for their contributions.
Sunday, November 13, 2011
Another Penn State Institution Tainted
The Berkey Creamery, the ice cream store located on the Penn State campus, had an ice cream called “Sandusky Blitz.”
The flavor — described on their web site as “banana flavored ice cream with chocolate covered peanuts and caramel swirl,” was pulled from the store's menu and website.
But Peachy Paterno is still for sale.
The flavor — described on their web site as “banana flavored ice cream with chocolate covered peanuts and caramel swirl,” was pulled from the store's menu and website.
But Peachy Paterno is still for sale.
Weekly Picks
Last week was my worst week of the season. I got only one point and I was fortunate to get even that much. Saints almost pushed, and Cardinals won in overtime. I'm still shocked by the Miami result and I would probably pick against them this week if they weren't playing the only team in the NFL with a worse offense, the Redskins.
PHILADELPHIA -13 1/2 arizona
No way they lose two home games in a row. Now the question is can they win by two touchdowns. It's about time for the Eagles to explode on offense and the defense should be able to shut down John Skelton.
GREEN BAY -12 1/2 minnesota
The last time they played Minnesota kept it close. I don't see that happening this time. Aaron Rodgers is on another level.
buffalo +5 DALLAS
I still want to believe the Bills were not an early season mirage. If they lose this game big, I guess it means they were.
CINCINNATI +4 1/2 pittsburgh
It's Week 10 and I still haven't picked a home dog. It's never too late. The Bengals might actually be a good team. Andy Dalton and the defense should be able to keep things close.
BEST BET
CAROLINA -3 1/2 tennessee
There has to come a point where Cam Newton's great performances start paying off in wins and losses. I think that comes this week against a Tennessee team that is very cold after a strong start.
Last week: 2-3 (1 points)
Season: 23-22 (24 points)
Best Bets: 0-1 (5-4)
Home Favorites: 2-3 (10-11
Home Underdogs: 0-0 (0-0)
Road Favorites: 0-0 (6-6)
Road Underdogs: 0-0 (7-5)
PHILADELPHIA -13 1/2 arizona
No way they lose two home games in a row. Now the question is can they win by two touchdowns. It's about time for the Eagles to explode on offense and the defense should be able to shut down John Skelton.
GREEN BAY -12 1/2 minnesota
The last time they played Minnesota kept it close. I don't see that happening this time. Aaron Rodgers is on another level.
buffalo +5 DALLAS
I still want to believe the Bills were not an early season mirage. If they lose this game big, I guess it means they were.
CINCINNATI +4 1/2 pittsburgh
It's Week 10 and I still haven't picked a home dog. It's never too late. The Bengals might actually be a good team. Andy Dalton and the defense should be able to keep things close.
BEST BET
CAROLINA -3 1/2 tennessee
There has to come a point where Cam Newton's great performances start paying off in wins and losses. I think that comes this week against a Tennessee team that is very cold after a strong start.
Last week: 2-3 (1 points)
Season: 23-22 (24 points)
Best Bets: 0-1 (5-4)
Home Favorites: 2-3 (10-11
Home Underdogs: 0-0 (0-0)
Road Favorites: 0-0 (6-6)
Road Underdogs: 0-0 (7-5)