Oh No, No More Mo

Even as a Mets fan I am saddened by the injury to Mariano Rivera. He tore his ACL while shagging flies in the outfield during batting practice. At 42 years old and in the midst of what was likely his last season anyway, Rivera will likely never pitch in a Major League game again. In a crumpled heap on the warning track is how the career of the greatest relief pitcher ever ends.

There isn’t even a debate as to whether Rivera is the best reliever ever. He has the most saves (608), the best ERA (2.21), the best FIP (min. 500 innings) and the best WAR (39) by far. He’s worth nearly 10 more wins over the course of his career than the second best guy, Goose Gossage. Only 9 relievers contributed even half as many wins over their careers as Rivera did. But like I said that is a foregone conclusion. It’s more fun to compare him to starting pitchers. His WHIP is unbelievable, second only to Addie Joss. And that doesn’t include any kind of adjustment for era. His ERA stacks up well, but many dead-ball era pitchers like Christy Mathewson, Walter Johnson and Mordecai “Three Finger” Brown are better. Until you adjust ERA for era. The career leaders for ERA+ (which basically compares ERA to league average and adjust for park effects) is 206. Meaning his ERA was less than half of league average for his career. Pedro Martinez is second, with 154. That’s a pretty big gap between 1st and 2nd all time. When you look at his individual seasons on ERA+ the numbers are sick. 308 in 2005, 316 in 2008 and a bunch of other years in the mid and high 200s. To put this in perspective, 150 is really good, 200 is amazing. He is routinely above 200.

And I haven’t even mentioned his postseason performance yet. He is arguably the great postseason performer of any player ever. 8-1 with 42 saves and 0.70 ERA in 141 innings. Against only the best teams. That is amazing. And all those great regular season numbers I just listed pale in comparison to his October greatness. Greatness we will likely never see again. Not from anyone else, and unfortunately not from Rivera himself either.

A Tan for All Seasons

Patricia Krentcil is a 44-year old mother of 5. She took her 5-year old daughter to the tanning salon. The child’s school noticed the little girl (who is actually quite pale) came to school with a burn. They reported it to authorities and the mother was arrested on child endangerment charges. That’s all well and good. Everyone knows little kids shouldn’t tan. It’s dangerous for everyone and could lead to skin cancer, but it’s especially bad for children who can’t make an informed choice about it. But no one would give two shits about this story if it weren’t for this awesome picture of the mother.

She looks like she smeared herself in chocolate. She looks like Kramer when he fell asleep in the tanning booth.

Giving the Orange Haters Ammunition

I don't even know how to cleverly write about this. Some Syracuse students, with a lot of University cooperation, recorded a Syracuse version of LMFAO's "Sexy and I Know It." How they got Floyd Little to do that dance I don't know, but I will never look at him the same way again.

Song of the Week

"Feel So Close" - Calvin Harris
There is nothing to this song. There are like ten words, but it has a cool beat.

Kate Upton is a Better Dancer Than David Green

Supermodel Kate Upton first stole our hearts while sitting courtside at a Clippers game and chair-dancing the Dougie.

Now she is teaching us how to do the Cat Daddy.

That looks like the same swimsuit she barely fit into on the cover of the Swimsuit Issue. And she was about to fall out of it while dancing or she might have kept going.
Bonus Kate Upton video with Kevin Durant and James Harden (before he got elbowed in the head presumably):

The tight asses at youtube actually removed the Cat Daddy video, here's an article explaining why: She dressed conservatively at the White House Correspondents dinner and still managed to turn heads. So imagine what model Kate Upton could do if she wore a red bikini and started dancing. That's what famed fashion photographer Terry Richardson wanted to find out with his latest art project, the Cat Daddy dance. The answer is: YouTube pulls the video for violation of its code on "nudity and sexual content" just as gossip websites around the world are trying to embed it. Although Upton is dressed provocatively in the video, and at times threatens dance out of her bikini, she isn't at any point naked, or flashing nipples.

What Do You Give Me For? Romeo Crennel and Reggie Smith

I was watching some recorded episodes of MLB Network's brilliant show "Baseball's Seasons" and I found myself dumbfounded by the fact that I never knew Kansas City Chiefs coach Romeo Crennel played for the Los Angeles Dodgers in the late 70s and early 80s. I'm kidding of course, but what do you give me for Romeo Crennel and Reggie Smith?

We Should Keep Our Eyes On This Kid

There's a boy in Texas named Flint who probably should be under federal surveillance for the rest of his life. After the local-TV weatherman Albert Ramon visited Flint's school, Flint's teacher had the class write thank you letter to Ramon. Here is Flint's letter:




"Thank you again for teaching us about meteorology [sic], you're more awesome than a monkey wearing a tuxedo made out of bacon riding a cyborg unicorn with a lightsaber for the horn on the tip of a space shuttle closing in on Mars while engulfed [sic] in flames...And in case you didn't know, that's pretty dang sweet."

I've got my eye on you, Flint.