Thanks to the disappointing Patriots I am starting to sink. I've still been pretty hot overall and haven't lost too much ground over a 5 week stretch in which I got only 1 best bet right. If I (and by I, I mean the Patriots) can cover the next 3 weeks I think I will be in first place entering the playoffs. But it begins this week, with these picks:
dallas -10 DETROIT
I said about 4 weeks ago that Dallas might not lose another game and Detroit might not win another one. I'm not ready to change my mind.
tampa bay -2 1/2 HOUSTON
I've picked games involving the Buccaneers 4 times this year (twice for, twice against) and I have been wrong every time. But I have a rule, if the spread is less than 3 points and you are sure you know which team is better, pick them.
CINCINNATI -6 st. louis
Brock Berlin is starting for the Rams.
cleveland -3 1/2 NEW YORK JETS
The Jets are frisky lately and could play the Browns tough at home. I think the Browns are pissed about the way they lost last week and I think they are capable of putting up more points than Kellen Clemens can match. But Jets fans should at least get a good show at Gate D at halftime, the team's first home game since that lovely halftime ritual was exposed.
Best Bet
NEW ENGLAND -10 pittsburgh
Pittsburgh is terrible on the road, losing to Arizona, Denver and the Jets. The Patriots have had two straight close games against teams that controlled the ball and blitzed the shit out of Tom Brady. But the reason I'm giving them another shot (I seriously considered a week off before hopping back on for Jets and Dolphins) is because the Pats bandwagon crashed when everyone jumped on. Now everyone piled off and the line dropped by 3 points in 2 days. Hopefully that's a sign that the worm has turned back around.
Last Week: 3-2 (2 points)
Season so far: 37-28 (38 points - T-5th, 3 points out of 1st)
Best bet: 0-1 (7-6)
Home favorites: 3-0 (15-7)
Home underdogs: 0-0 (3-0)
Road favorites: 0-1 (16-12)
Road underdogs: 0-0 (3-8)
Pick em: 0-1 (0-1)
Saturday, December 08, 2007
Friday, December 07, 2007
They Should Have Tried This on Prison Break
An inmate who escaped from a work-release crew by creating a distraction with an overflowing toilet has been recaptured.
Police arrested Wayne Mitchell, 24, when he showed up at his father's house in Indianapolis driving a Chevrolet Camaro convertible authorities said he stole to make his getaway.
Mitchell was in the Clark County Jail for a probation-violation warrant, but had been working with a crew clearing roadside trash.
When the crew stopped at the Clark County Fraternal Order of Police lodge to eat lunch Wednesday, Mitchell went into a restroom and clogged a toilet, causing it to overflow, police said. He then came out saying he needed some towels from the jail's van to sop up the mess.
"The toilet overflowed and the rest of the inmates were trying to clean it up," said Maj. Chuck Adams of the Clark County Sheriff's Department.
Instead of going to the van, Mitchell walked to nearby G&R Auto Sales, where an employee gave him the keys to a car he said he wanted to look over, police said. Police said he then stole a red 1995 Camaro.
Officers later found Mitchell's jail-issued clothes at the dealership, about 15 miles north of Louisville, Ky.
Mitchell has been returned to the jail in Clark County, Indianapolis authorities said Thursday night
Police arrested Wayne Mitchell, 24, when he showed up at his father's house in Indianapolis driving a Chevrolet Camaro convertible authorities said he stole to make his getaway.
Mitchell was in the Clark County Jail for a probation-violation warrant, but had been working with a crew clearing roadside trash.
When the crew stopped at the Clark County Fraternal Order of Police lodge to eat lunch Wednesday, Mitchell went into a restroom and clogged a toilet, causing it to overflow, police said. He then came out saying he needed some towels from the jail's van to sop up the mess.
"The toilet overflowed and the rest of the inmates were trying to clean it up," said Maj. Chuck Adams of the Clark County Sheriff's Department.
Instead of going to the van, Mitchell walked to nearby G&R Auto Sales, where an employee gave him the keys to a car he said he wanted to look over, police said. Police said he then stole a red 1995 Camaro.
Officers later found Mitchell's jail-issued clothes at the dealership, about 15 miles north of Louisville, Ky.
Mitchell has been returned to the jail in Clark County, Indianapolis authorities said Thursday night
Gibbs Gets It Right
After a season of kicking field goals and running into the line Joe Gibbs finally woke up from his slumber and against the Chicago Bears, he played to win the game.
With a 17-13 lead and 2:46 left, the Redskins faced a 3rd and 6 from the Bears 16.
I fully expected Gibbs to run into the line, kick the field goal and give the Bears the ball back with 2:40 left and no timeouts.
Instead the Redskins called a screen, Todd Collins flipped it over the middle to Ladell Betts who ran past everyone into the endzone for the game-clinching touchdown.
With a 17-13 lead and 2:46 left, the Redskins faced a 3rd and 6 from the Bears 16.
I fully expected Gibbs to run into the line, kick the field goal and give the Bears the ball back with 2:40 left and no timeouts.
Instead the Redskins called a screen, Todd Collins flipped it over the middle to Ladell Betts who ran past everyone into the endzone for the game-clinching touchdown.
Thursday, December 06, 2007
The NFL's Dranconian TV Rules
When you have a product, usually the best way to sell it is to make it available to as many people as you can. The NFL is staunchly resistant to this marketing approach. They deny access to so many games it's getting ridiculous.
1) I have always hated living in New York because on most Sundays you get the Giants and the Jets and nothing else. This rule was instituted to protect the attendance figures at the games. But the Jets and Giants sell out every single game. There is no conceivable reason why the New York market can't get an extra game on Sundays opposite a game of one of the local teams playing at home. Both networks would be affected equally by allowing this so it makes no sense why they continue to show only one game, a game that more than 50% of rabid football fans in the area are not interested in, unless they want to sell more NFL Sunday Ticket Packages.
2) The NFL only offers its Sunday Ticket on DirecTV. Why does the NFL risk alienating many of its fans who can't or don't want to subscribe to DirecTV. Let's look at the financial ramifications. DirecTV has about 16 million subscribers, about 2 million of them subscribe to NFL Sunday Ticket at a cost of about $250 a year.
DirecTV has 16 million subscribers, about 2 million of them subscribe to Sunday ticket at a cost of about $249 a year. That means Sunday Ticket generates about $500 million in revenue per year. DirecTV is paying $700 million a year ($3.5 billion over 5 years) for the exclusive rights to Sunday Ticket. That leaves them with a shortfall of at least $200 million, but to DirecTV they recoup that money by not losing those 2 million customers to cable. That extra money is the cost of keeping those customers and getting other revenue from them. It also is one of their best ways of acquiring new customers.
But I don't see why this deal works for the NFL. If roughly 12% of DirecTV subscribers buy the package don't you think they could get about 5% of current cable customers or 3.5 million more subscribers. If they could get that many subscribers by offering it on cable, even though they lose the premium paid for exclusivity, I think they'd make a lot more money. And they wouldn't be depriving customers of their product.
I don't understand the NFL's shortsightedness on this issue. I don't think the sports bar lobby is powerful enough to do anything about it, even though sports bars do pay higher fees to show the games I doubt they would all of the sudden stop buying the Ticket just because more people had it in their homes.
3) And the NFL's latest bit of television hegemony, the NFL Network. The NFL wants to push its new network, and I understand that. But they are asking the cable companies for 70 cents per customer. That's ridiculous. I am a huge football fan and even I would balk at paying $8.40 a year for a network I'll watch 8 to 10 times a year. How can people who don't care about the NFL (and there are some) be forced to pay that fee?
The cable companies have reportedly offered several other remedies (putting the network on a premium package and charging any amount to customers who choose to pay it or carrying the network only for those games at a fee), the only thing the cable companies won't agree to is forcing all their customers to accept the NFL Network and to pay more for it.
When I was a kid the last two weeks of the season would feature two Saturday afternoon games. One week it would be the Giants, and the Jets the next week. This would give the New York market 2 games on Sunday that didn't feature New York teams. Usually that gave me at least one extra chance to see the Redskins. This season, in order shove the NFL Network a little farther down our throats there is one Saturday game in each of the last three weeks, plus two more Thursday games, but no Saturday games for the networks this year.
NFL, listen up. You've got it good right now. The NFL can do no wrong. It is wildly popular and people can't get enough of the league. So give it to us. Never deprive the paying customer of your product to prove a point.
1) I have always hated living in New York because on most Sundays you get the Giants and the Jets and nothing else. This rule was instituted to protect the attendance figures at the games. But the Jets and Giants sell out every single game. There is no conceivable reason why the New York market can't get an extra game on Sundays opposite a game of one of the local teams playing at home. Both networks would be affected equally by allowing this so it makes no sense why they continue to show only one game, a game that more than 50% of rabid football fans in the area are not interested in, unless they want to sell more NFL Sunday Ticket Packages.
2) The NFL only offers its Sunday Ticket on DirecTV. Why does the NFL risk alienating many of its fans who can't or don't want to subscribe to DirecTV. Let's look at the financial ramifications. DirecTV has about 16 million subscribers, about 2 million of them subscribe to NFL Sunday Ticket at a cost of about $250 a year.
DirecTV has 16 million subscribers, about 2 million of them subscribe to Sunday ticket at a cost of about $249 a year. That means Sunday Ticket generates about $500 million in revenue per year. DirecTV is paying $700 million a year ($3.5 billion over 5 years) for the exclusive rights to Sunday Ticket. That leaves them with a shortfall of at least $200 million, but to DirecTV they recoup that money by not losing those 2 million customers to cable. That extra money is the cost of keeping those customers and getting other revenue from them. It also is one of their best ways of acquiring new customers.
But I don't see why this deal works for the NFL. If roughly 12% of DirecTV subscribers buy the package don't you think they could get about 5% of current cable customers or 3.5 million more subscribers. If they could get that many subscribers by offering it on cable, even though they lose the premium paid for exclusivity, I think they'd make a lot more money. And they wouldn't be depriving customers of their product.
I don't understand the NFL's shortsightedness on this issue. I don't think the sports bar lobby is powerful enough to do anything about it, even though sports bars do pay higher fees to show the games I doubt they would all of the sudden stop buying the Ticket just because more people had it in their homes.
3) And the NFL's latest bit of television hegemony, the NFL Network. The NFL wants to push its new network, and I understand that. But they are asking the cable companies for 70 cents per customer. That's ridiculous. I am a huge football fan and even I would balk at paying $8.40 a year for a network I'll watch 8 to 10 times a year. How can people who don't care about the NFL (and there are some) be forced to pay that fee?
The cable companies have reportedly offered several other remedies (putting the network on a premium package and charging any amount to customers who choose to pay it or carrying the network only for those games at a fee), the only thing the cable companies won't agree to is forcing all their customers to accept the NFL Network and to pay more for it.
When I was a kid the last two weeks of the season would feature two Saturday afternoon games. One week it would be the Giants, and the Jets the next week. This would give the New York market 2 games on Sunday that didn't feature New York teams. Usually that gave me at least one extra chance to see the Redskins. This season, in order shove the NFL Network a little farther down our throats there is one Saturday game in each of the last three weeks, plus two more Thursday games, but no Saturday games for the networks this year.
NFL, listen up. You've got it good right now. The NFL can do no wrong. It is wildly popular and people can't get enough of the league. So give it to us. Never deprive the paying customer of your product to prove a point.
Many Islands Low Fares
Spirit Airlines was advertising $9 flights between Florida and the Caribbean with the slogan "Many Islands Low Fares" or "MILF" for short.
When the uptight assholes complained Spirit gave them the old "I have no idea what you're talking about" defense.
But seeing as how a sexy older woman is depicted in the ad as well, I don't buy their excuse.
When the uptight assholes complained Spirit gave them the old "I have no idea what you're talking about" defense.
But seeing as how a sexy older woman is depicted in the ad as well, I don't buy their excuse.
Because We Know You're Not Watching "The View"
I know there are a lot of stupid people out there. People who didn't pay attention in school and never realized that some of what they missed was important to know. Or even worse, some people were home schooled and they only learned about Jesus and nothing else. I don't know what the fuck is the cause of Sherri Shepherd being so fuckin stupid, but there is no way she should be on "The View" every day. If you want to discuss news events please take your head out of your ass. I hope producers of the show fire her immediately. It amazes me that a thoughtful, well-spoken host like Elisabeth Hasselbeck is constantly lambasted by the liberal media and the liberal housewife audience just because she supports President Bush and is conservative on most issues yet no one says a word about Simple Sherri Shepherd who is too dumb to even form an opinion.
Here she says the world began with Jesus, evidently not realizing that B.C. stands for Before Christ, and that thousands of years of civilization came before that crazy Jew.
And here Sherri goes from saying there's no such thing as evolution to saying "the earth is flat." And even worse she gives the "I never thought about it" defense. She was too busy thinking about how to feed her child.
Here she says the world began with Jesus, evidently not realizing that B.C. stands for Before Christ, and that thousands of years of civilization came before that crazy Jew.
And here Sherri goes from saying there's no such thing as evolution to saying "the earth is flat." And even worse she gives the "I never thought about it" defense. She was too busy thinking about how to feed her child.
New Pics of Hot Bonnie
Looking at these new photos of Jocelyn Kirsch aka Hot Bonnie, you can tell she has fake tits. Her father is a plastic surgeon in Winston-Salem, North Carolina. He gave her the implants for Christmas in 2003. He sent them to her in a package, but it's not clear who installed the new knockers for her.
This is Embarrassing
It's not bad enough that Tony LaRussa got a DUI, now his failed sobriety tests are on youtube.
Wednesday, December 05, 2007
Join the Pageantry
Because Pride Pageantry Derek beat me to it, I will invite all Poopheads to join his group in espn.com's Bowl Mania.
You will need to create your entry first, then search for the group called "Pride Pageantry."
Select the winners of every game and assign a confidence score of 1 to 32.
You will need to create your entry first, then search for the group called "Pride Pageantry."
Select the winners of every game and assign a confidence score of 1 to 32.
Why Master Bates Washes Ice
In a test of ice cubes from 49 restaurants, the Chicago Sun-Times found that more than one of every five samples contained high levels of bacteria.
Samples taken at three of the restaurants contained an undetermined amount of fecal coliform, according to the findings of a government-certified laboratory that performed the tests.
By comparison, a water sample taken from a toilet in a men's room at the Sun-Times tested cleaner than the ice obtained at 21 of the restaurants and bars.
-Ice from 11 restaurants or bars had high levels of "total coliform bacteria" -- more than 200 bacteria colonies per milliliter tested. These included an Applebee's, a Chipotle Mexican Grill, an Outback Steakhouse, a Burger King, and the Drake Hotel.
-Nearly all of the ice tested that came from self-serve ice machines had low levels of bacteria or none at all.
Experts say they don't expect this to make people sick in large numbers, but it could explain those minor stomach ailments people often attribute to a bug.
"It means that obviously someone's not washing their hands properly, and there's fecal mater," Frances Guichard, director of food protection at the Chicago Health Department said. "If there's enough, it can make someone sick."
In the Sun-Times' tests, reporters ordered drinks with ice on the side or got the ice from self-serve machines. Taking care not to touch the ice and potentially contaminate it, they then transferred the cubes to sterile containers. The melted water from the ice cubes was tested the same day by Suburban Laboratories of Hillside, which is certified by the EPA.
For each sample, the lab counted the number of bacterial colonies and determined whether fecal coliform bacteria were present.
Samples taken at three of the restaurants contained an undetermined amount of fecal coliform, according to the findings of a government-certified laboratory that performed the tests.
By comparison, a water sample taken from a toilet in a men's room at the Sun-Times tested cleaner than the ice obtained at 21 of the restaurants and bars.
-Ice from 11 restaurants or bars had high levels of "total coliform bacteria" -- more than 200 bacteria colonies per milliliter tested. These included an Applebee's, a Chipotle Mexican Grill, an Outback Steakhouse, a Burger King, and the Drake Hotel.
-Nearly all of the ice tested that came from self-serve ice machines had low levels of bacteria or none at all.
Experts say they don't expect this to make people sick in large numbers, but it could explain those minor stomach ailments people often attribute to a bug.
"It means that obviously someone's not washing their hands properly, and there's fecal mater," Frances Guichard, director of food protection at the Chicago Health Department said. "If there's enough, it can make someone sick."
In the Sun-Times' tests, reporters ordered drinks with ice on the side or got the ice from self-serve machines. Taking care not to touch the ice and potentially contaminate it, they then transferred the cubes to sterile containers. The melted water from the ice cubes was tested the same day by Suburban Laboratories of Hillside, which is certified by the EPA.
For each sample, the lab counted the number of bacterial colonies and determined whether fecal coliform bacteria were present.
Happy Birthday
A year ago this cuddly little polar bear was born at the Berlin Zoo. Shortly thereafter his mother abandoned him and he was taken in by human keepers. They named him Knut and schoolchildren sang him songs of praise.
Knut celebrated his first birthday today in Berlin with a special cake with wooden candles, but he no longer has that fuzzy whiteness that we all we in love with.
Knut celebrated his first birthday today in Berlin with a special cake with wooden candles, but he no longer has that fuzzy whiteness that we all we in love with.
I Love It Too
"I love my body" - Jennifer Love Hewitt
Jennifer Love Huge-Tits is responding to a slew of snarky comments about her huge ass after these bikini pictures of her were spread around the internet.
After internet haters made comments like "I know what you ate last summer, everything" Hewitt fired back in defense of her body, as if it needed defending.
On her blog, she wrote: "I've sat by in silence for a long time now about the way women's bodies are constantly scrutinized. To set the record straight, I'm not upset for me, but for all of the girls out there that are struggling with their body image.
A size 2 is not fat! Nor will it ever be. And being a size 0 doesn't make you beautiful.
What I should be doing is celebrating some of the best days of my life and my engagement to the man of my dreams, instead of having to deal with photographers taking invasive pictures from bad angles. I know what I look like, and so do my friends and family. And like all women out there should, I love my body.
To all girls with butts, boobs, hips and a waist, put on a bikini -- put it on and stay strong."
I know she's a celebrity and she can be made fun of and she makes money off her body but if this is the standard we hold women to, it's no wonder young girls starve themselves and make themselves puke and when that doesn't work they suck dick in order to make boys like them.
Ok, so she doesn't look great in those bikini shots, but she looks pretty damn good in this one.
Jennifer Love Huge-Tits is responding to a slew of snarky comments about her huge ass after these bikini pictures of her were spread around the internet.
After internet haters made comments like "I know what you ate last summer, everything" Hewitt fired back in defense of her body, as if it needed defending.
On her blog, she wrote: "I've sat by in silence for a long time now about the way women's bodies are constantly scrutinized. To set the record straight, I'm not upset for me, but for all of the girls out there that are struggling with their body image.
A size 2 is not fat! Nor will it ever be. And being a size 0 doesn't make you beautiful.
What I should be doing is celebrating some of the best days of my life and my engagement to the man of my dreams, instead of having to deal with photographers taking invasive pictures from bad angles. I know what I look like, and so do my friends and family. And like all women out there should, I love my body.
To all girls with butts, boobs, hips and a waist, put on a bikini -- put it on and stay strong."
I know she's a celebrity and she can be made fun of and she makes money off her body but if this is the standard we hold women to, it's no wonder young girls starve themselves and make themselves puke and when that doesn't work they suck dick in order to make boys like them.
Ok, so she doesn't look great in those bikini shots, but she looks pretty damn good in this one.
Hottest Identity Thief Ever
Following in the very sexy footsteps of Faye Dunaway in "Bonnie and Clyde", Jocelyn Kirsch is the sexiest identity thief I've ever seen.
Kirsch along with her boyfriend Edward Anderton is accused of stealing more than $100,000 by using the identities of their neighbors in a fancy Philadelphia apartment building.
They lived in a $3,000 a month apartment in Belgravia in Center City. They traveled the world hitting Paris, Hawaii and Turks and Caicos and taking pictures to remember it all.
Neighbors wondered how a young college student (she was going to Drexel) could afford all the fancy clothes she wore. He had recently been fired from his job as a financial analyst, he graduated from the University of Pennsylvania.
Kirsch recently went into a salon and spent all day getting somewhere between $1700 and $2200 hundred dollars worth of hair extensions.
She paid with stolen credit cards and phony checks and introduced herself as Morgan Greenhouse.
The salon's owner was skeptical that this young girl in the True Religion jeans could afford the services, so she asked "do you have any idea the costs of these extensions?'" Kirsch responded "Don't worry about the money. Money is not an issue."
Now she may never get paid for her services.
Police finally caught up with Bonnie and Clyde when one of their victims was told that her package had arrived and would be waiting at a local UPS store. The victim who didn't order anything, called police, who were waiting for Kirsch and Anderton when they showed up to pick up the stolen stuff.
In their apartment police found keys to at least 40 apartments and mailboxes, high tech electronics include an Apple laptop, a machine for making high-quality fake IDs, as well as fake IDs and credit cards in many different names.
Kirsch along with her boyfriend Edward Anderton is accused of stealing more than $100,000 by using the identities of their neighbors in a fancy Philadelphia apartment building.
They lived in a $3,000 a month apartment in Belgravia in Center City. They traveled the world hitting Paris, Hawaii and Turks and Caicos and taking pictures to remember it all.
Neighbors wondered how a young college student (she was going to Drexel) could afford all the fancy clothes she wore. He had recently been fired from his job as a financial analyst, he graduated from the University of Pennsylvania.
Kirsch recently went into a salon and spent all day getting somewhere between $1700 and $2200 hundred dollars worth of hair extensions.
She paid with stolen credit cards and phony checks and introduced herself as Morgan Greenhouse.
The salon's owner was skeptical that this young girl in the True Religion jeans could afford the services, so she asked "do you have any idea the costs of these extensions?'" Kirsch responded "Don't worry about the money. Money is not an issue."
Now she may never get paid for her services.
Police finally caught up with Bonnie and Clyde when one of their victims was told that her package had arrived and would be waiting at a local UPS store. The victim who didn't order anything, called police, who were waiting for Kirsch and Anderton when they showed up to pick up the stolen stuff.
In their apartment police found keys to at least 40 apartments and mailboxes, high tech electronics include an Apple laptop, a machine for making high-quality fake IDs, as well as fake IDs and credit cards in many different names.
The NFL is Poop - Week 13
Less Than Perfect
For the second straight week the New England Patriots survived by the hairs on their chinny, chin, chin. A couple of things are being pointed to as reasons why they won, bad playcalling by the Ravens and bad officiating by the refs. Neither is true, the Pats won because they make the plays.
With a 24-17 lead and 10 minutes left in the 4th quarter the Ravens faced a 3rd and 14 on the New England 30. They tried a deep pass and got intercepted. I don't disagree with the playcall. Sure they could have tried a screen pass or a run to set up a 40 yard or so field goal to take a 10 point lead. But the weather was bad, it was windy and no field goal was a chip shot. They tried to catch New England napping and stick a dagger in them. It didn't work. But they were playing to win the game. When you play not to lose, you usually do.
For some reason the Ravens are also being criticized for calling a timeout right before New England ran a crucial 4th and 1 play. The only reason to blame them is because the Ravens stopped them on this play. But defensive coordinator Rex Ryan obviously thought they didn't have the right personnel in, so he tried to get his team more prepared. Didn't work. Doesn't mean it was wrong.
And the officials are being castigated for granting the timeout, but he clearly called it before the snap.
Then there was the holding penalty called on Jason Winborne on a crucial play that would have ended the game. But the penalty was clear.
The only call I disagree with the refs about was whether Jabar Gaffney had control of the touchdown catch before he went out of bounds. It depends on your definition of control. He wasn't bobbling it, but he didn't have it secure AND have both feet in bounds at the same time.
Maybe the worst indiscretion by a referee came from Phil McKinnley who reportedly called Ravens cornerback Samari Rolle "boy" several times during the game. Big fuckin deal. If that's all it takes for you to feel disrespected, you need to get a thicker skin. And although "boy" has some racial context, the accused referee is black, so that's not an issue.
The Patriots are a good team that made plays and got lucky, but the refs didn't hand them this game.
Don't Be Flip
New Orleans coach Sean Payton is getting lambasted for calling a reverse when his team just needed one first down to put the game away. The Saints had a 3 point lead, and the ball at midfield with 3:30 left and Tampa Bay was out of timeouts. Reggie Bush pitched to Devery Henderson, but the pitch was bad and the Bucs recovered and drove for the winning touchdown. Most coaches would have called 2 running plays, and tried to pin the Bucs deep with 2:30 left and no timeouts. I don't hate this move but I do see the inherent risks involved. Plus it ended up costing the Saints the game, and probably any chance at a playoff spot.
Two Many Mistakes
It amazes me that NFL coaches work 18 hour days, sleep in their offices and watch so many hours of game film that they know every tendency of every opponent, yet by and large none of them, have figured out when to use the 2-point conversion. New York Giants coach Tom Coughlin is the latest example. The Giants scored with a minute 37 seconds left to take a 20-16 lead. By the way, I have no problem with him leaving the Bears too much time. You have to win the game. You do it when you can, you can't risk a bad snap, a penalty, you have to be aggressive and try to score. Anyway, with 97 seconds left there probably wasn't enough time for the difference between a 4 and 5 point lead to matter. But if Coughlin had gone for 2 and gotten it, he could have benefitted from the possible (although admittedly unlikely) scenario of a missed extra point. The only possibility, which I doubt he considered was that if the Bears got a quick TD, they'd have had to go for 2 to give them a 3-point lead to protect against a Giants field goal. And if he missed, they'd have kicked and gotten a 3-point lead. But I think Coughlin just fucked up.
Game of the Week
Arizona Cardinals 27 Cleveland Browns 21
Two frisky, underestimated, high-scoring teams meet in a shootout that comes down to the last play and ends in controversy. It's hard to win when you are minus-3 in turnovers and kudos to the Cardinals for converting 3 of the Browns 4 turnovers into touchdowns. One on a pick-6, one after a 43-yard drive, the other on a 22-yard drive. But the Browns were one strong push from winning the game anyway. On the last play, Derek Anderson hit Kellen Winslow in the endzone from 37 yards out. Winslow clearly caught the ball, but he clearly came down out of bounds. The only question was whether he was forced out. It's a judgement call and the offical judged no. It is not reviewable, but they reviewed it anyway for some reason.
Game of Next Week
Pittsburgh Steelers at New England Patriots
If anyone can follow the supposed blueprint of run the ball down their throats and hammer their receivers, it is the Pittsburgh Steelers. I'd be shocked if the Pats had a third straight bad game.
A Brief Rant About the Redskins
I don't get NFL Network. For a longer rant, click here.
Cheerleader of the Week
Megan J. of the Arizona Cardinals Cheerleaders
Megan likes ice cream and Ramen Noodles and her favorite restaurant in "The Melting Pot." She's the second COTW to love that restaurant, joining Becca and just about every other person who has ever eaten there. She's a rookie who teaches aerobics in her spare time (she enjoys "making people work hard and sweat!") but unfortunately she's married.
If the Super Bowl Were Played Today
New England Patriots 30 Dallas Cowboys 27
If the Pats fall to the Steelers would they still deserve this spot?
For the second straight week the New England Patriots survived by the hairs on their chinny, chin, chin. A couple of things are being pointed to as reasons why they won, bad playcalling by the Ravens and bad officiating by the refs. Neither is true, the Pats won because they make the plays.
With a 24-17 lead and 10 minutes left in the 4th quarter the Ravens faced a 3rd and 14 on the New England 30. They tried a deep pass and got intercepted. I don't disagree with the playcall. Sure they could have tried a screen pass or a run to set up a 40 yard or so field goal to take a 10 point lead. But the weather was bad, it was windy and no field goal was a chip shot. They tried to catch New England napping and stick a dagger in them. It didn't work. But they were playing to win the game. When you play not to lose, you usually do.
For some reason the Ravens are also being criticized for calling a timeout right before New England ran a crucial 4th and 1 play. The only reason to blame them is because the Ravens stopped them on this play. But defensive coordinator Rex Ryan obviously thought they didn't have the right personnel in, so he tried to get his team more prepared. Didn't work. Doesn't mean it was wrong.
And the officials are being castigated for granting the timeout, but he clearly called it before the snap.
Then there was the holding penalty called on Jason Winborne on a crucial play that would have ended the game. But the penalty was clear.
The only call I disagree with the refs about was whether Jabar Gaffney had control of the touchdown catch before he went out of bounds. It depends on your definition of control. He wasn't bobbling it, but he didn't have it secure AND have both feet in bounds at the same time.
Maybe the worst indiscretion by a referee came from Phil McKinnley who reportedly called Ravens cornerback Samari Rolle "boy" several times during the game. Big fuckin deal. If that's all it takes for you to feel disrespected, you need to get a thicker skin. And although "boy" has some racial context, the accused referee is black, so that's not an issue.
The Patriots are a good team that made plays and got lucky, but the refs didn't hand them this game.
Don't Be Flip
New Orleans coach Sean Payton is getting lambasted for calling a reverse when his team just needed one first down to put the game away. The Saints had a 3 point lead, and the ball at midfield with 3:30 left and Tampa Bay was out of timeouts. Reggie Bush pitched to Devery Henderson, but the pitch was bad and the Bucs recovered and drove for the winning touchdown. Most coaches would have called 2 running plays, and tried to pin the Bucs deep with 2:30 left and no timeouts. I don't hate this move but I do see the inherent risks involved. Plus it ended up costing the Saints the game, and probably any chance at a playoff spot.
Two Many Mistakes
It amazes me that NFL coaches work 18 hour days, sleep in their offices and watch so many hours of game film that they know every tendency of every opponent, yet by and large none of them, have figured out when to use the 2-point conversion. New York Giants coach Tom Coughlin is the latest example. The Giants scored with a minute 37 seconds left to take a 20-16 lead. By the way, I have no problem with him leaving the Bears too much time. You have to win the game. You do it when you can, you can't risk a bad snap, a penalty, you have to be aggressive and try to score. Anyway, with 97 seconds left there probably wasn't enough time for the difference between a 4 and 5 point lead to matter. But if Coughlin had gone for 2 and gotten it, he could have benefitted from the possible (although admittedly unlikely) scenario of a missed extra point. The only possibility, which I doubt he considered was that if the Bears got a quick TD, they'd have had to go for 2 to give them a 3-point lead to protect against a Giants field goal. And if he missed, they'd have kicked and gotten a 3-point lead. But I think Coughlin just fucked up.
Game of the Week
Arizona Cardinals 27 Cleveland Browns 21
Two frisky, underestimated, high-scoring teams meet in a shootout that comes down to the last play and ends in controversy. It's hard to win when you are minus-3 in turnovers and kudos to the Cardinals for converting 3 of the Browns 4 turnovers into touchdowns. One on a pick-6, one after a 43-yard drive, the other on a 22-yard drive. But the Browns were one strong push from winning the game anyway. On the last play, Derek Anderson hit Kellen Winslow in the endzone from 37 yards out. Winslow clearly caught the ball, but he clearly came down out of bounds. The only question was whether he was forced out. It's a judgement call and the offical judged no. It is not reviewable, but they reviewed it anyway for some reason.
Game of Next Week
Pittsburgh Steelers at New England Patriots
If anyone can follow the supposed blueprint of run the ball down their throats and hammer their receivers, it is the Pittsburgh Steelers. I'd be shocked if the Pats had a third straight bad game.
A Brief Rant About the Redskins
I don't get NFL Network. For a longer rant, click here.
Cheerleader of the Week
Megan J. of the Arizona Cardinals Cheerleaders
Megan likes ice cream and Ramen Noodles and her favorite restaurant in "The Melting Pot." She's the second COTW to love that restaurant, joining Becca and just about every other person who has ever eaten there. She's a rookie who teaches aerobics in her spare time (she enjoys "making people work hard and sweat!") but unfortunately she's married.
If the Super Bowl Were Played Today
New England Patriots 30 Dallas Cowboys 27
If the Pats fall to the Steelers would they still deserve this spot?
Tuesday, December 04, 2007
Monday, December 03, 2007
A Long Rant About the Redskins
You Gotta Play With Emotion
The talk leading up to this game centered on what would happen to the Redskins, and there were only 2 choices: a) they channel the emotion and win, b) they wear out from all the emotion and lose. As it turned out, the results could indicate that both happened (the Redskins had a big lead and blew it), but the truth is, neither happened. First of all, how overly simplistic is it to expect 53 men to react to tragedy in exactly the same way. The thought that every single one of them could be so empowered by Taylor's death that they would play above their usual abilities is preposterous. Some probably played better through their grief, perhaps others were hindered by it. Or maybe during the game they put it out of their minds and played as they do every other Sunday. That's what it looked like to me, as the Redskins blew another game they should have won thanks to bad coaching and the inability to make the one game-clinching play.
Childhood Illustions Shattered
When I was growing up Coach Gibbs was a hero. A larger than life authority figure who coached with an iron fist and a gentle heart. He was tough but he had a soft spot and a deeply religios side. And he won. He won 3 Super Bowls with 3 different quarterbacks, at the time no one had done it with 2 (technically Parcells had 2 different QBs in the Super Bowl, but Simms played most of the second Super Bowl season). And at the time they were 3 of the worst Super Bowl winning quarterbacks. Gibbs then left the team in the incapable hands of Richie Petibon leading to more than a decade of terrible teams. Gibbs left to dominate NASCAR but in 2004 decided to come back. At the time I viewed it as a great return to past glory, good old Coach Gibbs would restore Redskins pride and bring us back where we need to be. In the fourth season of Gibbs Part Deux, it has been an absolute disaster. Other than a playoff appearance in 2005 (after a 5-6 start the Skins won 5 in a row to make the playoffs, even winning the first game), his teams are 6-10, 5-11 and 5-7 so far this year. He clearly hasn't adjusted his game plan to the new NFL which involves more passing and less of his 3 yards and a cloud of dust offense which worked when you could build a great offensive line like the Hogs. Also new in the NFL, calling timeouts right as an opponent tries to kick a field goal. Which brings us to...
The Stupidest Coaching Decision Of Gibbs's Career
With the Redskins leading 16-14 Bills kicker Rian Lindell was lining up for a game-winning field goal from 51 yards away. Gibbs called timeout just as Lindell was about to kick. Lindell made that kick but he would have to try again. As he was about to, Gibbs called timeout again. You can't do that and Gibbs got a 15 yard penalty for unsportsmanlike conduct. That moved Lindell up, to a much easier field goal, which he made, to stick another dagger through the Redskins already pained hearts.
Personal Responsibility
"There's nobody to blame but myself. I should have known the rule." -- Joe Gibbs.
Another Questionable Decision by Gibbs
This one I agreed with at the time, but having access to the results, I now see the logic of going the other way. With 11 minutes left and the Redskins winning 16-8, the Bills were facing 3rd and goal from the 24. They gained 18 yards on the play but also committed a penalty. Gibbs elected to give the Bills a short field goal rather than put them at 3rd and goal from the 34 and risk a penalty for a first down. The Bills probably would have tried a safe running play to get a few yards back and the result would have been the same, but the field goal did come back to haunt the Skins.
Jason Campbell, Not Getting it Done
Campbell had a great first quarter, hitting every receiver but once again he failed in the redzone. The Redskins had 1st and 10 at the 14, 1st and goal at the 3, and 1st and 10 at the 15, and ended up with 3 field goals. Also for the fourth straight game, he couldn't make a play to put the game away.
Tribute to Taylor
The Redskins played their first defensive play of the game with only 10 players, in tribute to Taylor. The Bills gained 22 yards on the play, proving how much Taylor will be missed.
The talk leading up to this game centered on what would happen to the Redskins, and there were only 2 choices: a) they channel the emotion and win, b) they wear out from all the emotion and lose. As it turned out, the results could indicate that both happened (the Redskins had a big lead and blew it), but the truth is, neither happened. First of all, how overly simplistic is it to expect 53 men to react to tragedy in exactly the same way. The thought that every single one of them could be so empowered by Taylor's death that they would play above their usual abilities is preposterous. Some probably played better through their grief, perhaps others were hindered by it. Or maybe during the game they put it out of their minds and played as they do every other Sunday. That's what it looked like to me, as the Redskins blew another game they should have won thanks to bad coaching and the inability to make the one game-clinching play.
Childhood Illustions Shattered
When I was growing up Coach Gibbs was a hero. A larger than life authority figure who coached with an iron fist and a gentle heart. He was tough but he had a soft spot and a deeply religios side. And he won. He won 3 Super Bowls with 3 different quarterbacks, at the time no one had done it with 2 (technically Parcells had 2 different QBs in the Super Bowl, but Simms played most of the second Super Bowl season). And at the time they were 3 of the worst Super Bowl winning quarterbacks. Gibbs then left the team in the incapable hands of Richie Petibon leading to more than a decade of terrible teams. Gibbs left to dominate NASCAR but in 2004 decided to come back. At the time I viewed it as a great return to past glory, good old Coach Gibbs would restore Redskins pride and bring us back where we need to be. In the fourth season of Gibbs Part Deux, it has been an absolute disaster. Other than a playoff appearance in 2005 (after a 5-6 start the Skins won 5 in a row to make the playoffs, even winning the first game), his teams are 6-10, 5-11 and 5-7 so far this year. He clearly hasn't adjusted his game plan to the new NFL which involves more passing and less of his 3 yards and a cloud of dust offense which worked when you could build a great offensive line like the Hogs. Also new in the NFL, calling timeouts right as an opponent tries to kick a field goal. Which brings us to...
The Stupidest Coaching Decision Of Gibbs's Career
With the Redskins leading 16-14 Bills kicker Rian Lindell was lining up for a game-winning field goal from 51 yards away. Gibbs called timeout just as Lindell was about to kick. Lindell made that kick but he would have to try again. As he was about to, Gibbs called timeout again. You can't do that and Gibbs got a 15 yard penalty for unsportsmanlike conduct. That moved Lindell up, to a much easier field goal, which he made, to stick another dagger through the Redskins already pained hearts.
Personal Responsibility
"There's nobody to blame but myself. I should have known the rule." -- Joe Gibbs.
Another Questionable Decision by Gibbs
This one I agreed with at the time, but having access to the results, I now see the logic of going the other way. With 11 minutes left and the Redskins winning 16-8, the Bills were facing 3rd and goal from the 24. They gained 18 yards on the play but also committed a penalty. Gibbs elected to give the Bills a short field goal rather than put them at 3rd and goal from the 34 and risk a penalty for a first down. The Bills probably would have tried a safe running play to get a few yards back and the result would have been the same, but the field goal did come back to haunt the Skins.
Jason Campbell, Not Getting it Done
Campbell had a great first quarter, hitting every receiver but once again he failed in the redzone. The Redskins had 1st and 10 at the 14, 1st and goal at the 3, and 1st and 10 at the 15, and ended up with 3 field goals. Also for the fourth straight game, he couldn't make a play to put the game away.
Tribute to Taylor
The Redskins played their first defensive play of the game with only 10 players, in tribute to Taylor. The Bills gained 22 yards on the play, proving how much Taylor will be missed.
Taking One For The Team
With just seconds left in regulation and K-State lined up to inbound the ball and run a last second play, Bill Walker was overcome with an urge too strong to control. He stepped to the sideline and relieved himself with several towels
If you follow these things closely you might remember that Bill Walker and OJ Mayo transferred together to a high school in Cincinnati for their junior years and lived with some guy (agent, AAU coach, whatever), but really they lived in the apartment alone. After that year, Walker had used up his eligibility and went on to Kansas State, then Mayo moved back to West Virginia.
If you follow these things closely you might remember that Bill Walker and OJ Mayo transferred together to a high school in Cincinnati for their junior years and lived with some guy (agent, AAU coach, whatever), but really they lived in the apartment alone. After that year, Walker had used up his eligibility and went on to Kansas State, then Mayo moved back to West Virginia.
TV & Movie Writers' Strike Update
Faced with the possibility of showing reruns in primetime, TV studios have finally caved on the key issue in the current strike.
In a new contract proposal to the writers the studios are offering $130 million in additional compensation for content delivered over the internet.
Sharing the revenue from new media is the key sticking point in the negotiations.
This offer seems low to me, but the fact that the studios realize they have to share will probably result in them increasing this offer to a point where it is acceptable to the writers.
The Writers Guild has asked for four days to review the offer.
Most shows usually go into reruns over the holidays anyway, but I expect this deal to be done in enough time so that all shows will begin showing new episodes in January.
But I think the studios will have to pony up a lot more money to get it done.
Variety is predicting the strike will go on until March.
In a new contract proposal to the writers the studios are offering $130 million in additional compensation for content delivered over the internet.
Sharing the revenue from new media is the key sticking point in the negotiations.
This offer seems low to me, but the fact that the studios realize they have to share will probably result in them increasing this offer to a point where it is acceptable to the writers.
The Writers Guild has asked for four days to review the offer.
Most shows usually go into reruns over the holidays anyway, but I expect this deal to be done in enough time so that all shows will begin showing new episodes in January.
But I think the studios will have to pony up a lot more money to get it done.
Variety is predicting the strike will go on until March.
Christmas is Poop
In parts of Spain, it is customary to put a statue of a peasant squatting behind a rock with his rear-end exposed in the Nativity scenes.
Throughout Spain's northeastern Catalonia region, statuettes of "El Caganer," or "the great defecator," can be found in Christmas scenes, and increasingly on the mantelpieces of collectors, where for centuries symbols of defecation have played an important role in the season's festivities.
During the holidays, pastry shops around Catalonia sell sweets shaped like feces, and on Christmas Eve Catalan children beat a hollow log, called the tio, packed with holiday gifts, singing a song that urges it to poop presents out the other end.
These traditions, dating back as far as the 17th century, come from Catalonia's origins as an agrarian society where defecation was associated with fertility and health.
And you can buy figurines of famous poopers too.
Throughout Spain's northeastern Catalonia region, statuettes of "El Caganer," or "the great defecator," can be found in Christmas scenes, and increasingly on the mantelpieces of collectors, where for centuries symbols of defecation have played an important role in the season's festivities.
During the holidays, pastry shops around Catalonia sell sweets shaped like feces, and on Christmas Eve Catalan children beat a hollow log, called the tio, packed with holiday gifts, singing a song that urges it to poop presents out the other end.
These traditions, dating back as far as the 17th century, come from Catalonia's origins as an agrarian society where defecation was associated with fertility and health.
And you can buy figurines of famous poopers too.
Priorities
Police in Oklahoma, arrested a man after finding his four young children in a near-freezing car outside a strip club.
Cardrico Lajuan Nash was allegedly in the Taboo Topless Cabaret for at least an hour before police, responding to a citizen's call, discovered the children, including a 3-month-old baby, sleeping in the car about 1 a.m. The other children are ages 4, 6 and 7. It was about 35 degrees at the time.
Cardrico Lajuan Nash was allegedly in the Taboo Topless Cabaret for at least an hour before police, responding to a citizen's call, discovered the children, including a 3-month-old baby, sleeping in the car about 1 a.m. The other children are ages 4, 6 and 7. It was about 35 degrees at the time.
Introducing the Malcontent
A friend of mine has an excellent blog, Deus Ex Malcontent, but I never thought it would appeal to the Poopheads, until now.
The Malcontent usually features long, thoughtful, insightful commentary on political and social issues, almost the exact opposite of what you find here. He almost never covers my touchstones: boobies, sports and Chase.
The Malcontent is a misanthrope who hates just about everything, except "Can't Hardly Wait."
The Malcontent usually features long, thoughtful, insightful commentary on political and social issues, almost the exact opposite of what you find here. He almost never covers my touchstones: boobies, sports and Chase.
The Malcontent is a misanthrope who hates just about everything, except "Can't Hardly Wait."