Showing posts with label golf. Show all posts
Showing posts with label golf. Show all posts
Wednesday, May 13, 2015
"I Googled Her"
Rickie Fowler's big win over the weekend was surely a nice boost to his career, but was even better for his girlfriend Alexis Randock.
After that clip of them making out on the 18th green went around the internet Google searches for her exploded. Including one from Michael Wilbon who said that after seeing her, no one can criticize Fowler ever again.
Because I know Googling someone is difficult, I did the work for you. Oh, and did I mention she is a bikini model?
Monday, April 11, 2011
A Pretty Good Consolation Prize
Jason Day may not have won the Masters but his wife Ellie has to be making him feel pretty good anyway.
In fact, Tiger Woods shot 5-under on the front 9 and seemed to lose his focus on the back. Perhaps he saw Ellie Day on the fairway.
The cameras seemed to focus on her for every shot hit by her husband, but still I couldn't find good pictures of her on Google.
This one is too blurry.
This one was clearly shot from a TV screen, the program info is still there.
It looks like she's giving me the finger in this one.
Ok, that looks a little better.
She even looks hot dressed as a caddy.
In fact, Tiger Woods shot 5-under on the front 9 and seemed to lose his focus on the back. Perhaps he saw Ellie Day on the fairway.
The cameras seemed to focus on her for every shot hit by her husband, but still I couldn't find good pictures of her on Google.
This one is too blurry.
This one was clearly shot from a TV screen, the program info is still there.
It looks like she's giving me the finger in this one.
Ok, that looks a little better.
She even looks hot dressed as a caddy.
Sunday, November 29, 2009
What Really Happened
The biggest story in the world right is now is the mysterious car accident of Tiger Woods. Everyone wants to know what really happened, and a pretty obvious picture is surfacing.
Recent rumors of Tiger having an affair with New York nightclub hostess Rachel Uchitel surfaced. Tiger and Elin were obviously fighting about it, maybe Tiger got a strange text.
It was 2am the night after Thanksgiving and Tiger was taking some painkillers. They had a fight and Elin went crazy, she attacked him and scratched his face up pretty good. He tried to leave the house to go for a drive. She chased him down with a golf club (oh the irony) and at some point smashed the back window.
Distracted by the crazy woman chasing him, perhaps bleeding from scratches to his face, perhaps a little foggy due to painkillers Tiger crashed his car into a fire hydrant and then a tree.
But there are a few questions still unanswered.
First, why do the Woodses keep putting off their interview with the cops? Some say they are waiting for Tiger's injuries to heal so he can blame his facial scratches on the accident and the broken glass, but if he was already treated at the hospital those injuries would likely be photographed and documented and I believe that could be shared with the police in an ongoing investigation. Another possibility is that maybe Elin has a black eye or something that would incriminate Tiger.
And the second, and more puzzling question, why would Tiger cheat on Elin, his swedish bikini model wife?
I guess the old adage is true, "everywhere there's a beautiful woman, there's a guy tired of fucking her."
Recent rumors of Tiger having an affair with New York nightclub hostess Rachel Uchitel surfaced. Tiger and Elin were obviously fighting about it, maybe Tiger got a strange text.
It was 2am the night after Thanksgiving and Tiger was taking some painkillers. They had a fight and Elin went crazy, she attacked him and scratched his face up pretty good. He tried to leave the house to go for a drive. She chased him down with a golf club (oh the irony) and at some point smashed the back window.
Distracted by the crazy woman chasing him, perhaps bleeding from scratches to his face, perhaps a little foggy due to painkillers Tiger crashed his car into a fire hydrant and then a tree.
But there are a few questions still unanswered.
First, why do the Woodses keep putting off their interview with the cops? Some say they are waiting for Tiger's injuries to heal so he can blame his facial scratches on the accident and the broken glass, but if he was already treated at the hospital those injuries would likely be photographed and documented and I believe that could be shared with the police in an ongoing investigation. Another possibility is that maybe Elin has a black eye or something that would incriminate Tiger.
And the second, and more puzzling question, why would Tiger cheat on Elin, his swedish bikini model wife?
I guess the old adage is true, "everywhere there's a beautiful woman, there's a guy tired of fucking her."
Tuesday, August 04, 2009
Tiger Rips One
Tiger Woods allegedly caught on camera farting at the Buick Open
I can believe some people actually think this is a real fart. No one, not even the great Tiger Woods farts like that. I think someone in the gallery downloaded the iFart application on their iPhone and let one rip during a quiet moment. Loud enough for Tiger to hear it and make him laugh, but no way that was real, unless the camera was literally up his ass.
I can believe some people actually think this is a real fart. No one, not even the great Tiger Woods farts like that. I think someone in the gallery downloaded the iFart application on their iPhone and let one rip during a quiet moment. Loud enough for Tiger to hear it and make him laugh, but no way that was real, unless the camera was literally up his ass.
Tuesday, February 24, 2009
A Cold-Blooded Thing to Say To A Mother Fucker Before You Pop a Cap in His Ass
The "Tiger Woods is Back" hype hits a high note with this awesome ad featuring Samuel L. Jackson recreating his famous "Ezekiel 25:17" speech from "Pulp Fiction."
Thursday, February 19, 2009
Let That Be a Lesson To You
I like Tiger Woods more and more everyday. The guy pretty much has the perfect life.
I mean, don't they look happy?
And you'll note he has two kids, not 14, and he has dogs, not chimpanzees.
Tiger and Elin unveiling their new baby, Charlie Axel Woods, in a similar manner to the way in which they released photos of their daughter, Sam Alexis.
I mean, don't they look happy?
And you'll note he has two kids, not 14, and he has dogs, not chimpanzees.
Tiger and Elin unveiling their new baby, Charlie Axel Woods, in a similar manner to the way in which they released photos of their daughter, Sam Alexis.
Monday, July 21, 2008
Greg Norman Chokes Again
Greg Norman entered Sunday with a 2 stroke lead in the British Open. He bogeyed the first three holes, shot a 77 for the day and finished 6 strokes back, continuing one of the worst records of anyone in any sport.
He's now lost 54-hole leads 7 times in a major, and only one once in those situations.
Obviously, he's well past his prime and it was amazing for him to even finish as high as he did, but his age didn't catch up with him, his past did.
There is definitely something about Norman (we'll never know what it is) that brings out the worst in him when his best is needed.
He's now lost 54-hole leads 7 times in a major, and only one once in those situations.
Obviously, he's well past his prime and it was amazing for him to even finish as high as he did, but his age didn't catch up with him, his past did.
There is definitely something about Norman (we'll never know what it is) that brings out the worst in him when his best is needed.
Friday, May 16, 2008
He Needs a Sponsor
When Paul Goydos made his surprising run at the TPC he was the only one on the leaderboard without a sponsor's logo on his hat.
Instead he honored his alma mater, Long Beach State. Their teams are officially called the "49ers" but the baseball team has the pseudonym "Dirtbags."
If you look closely you can see the word Dirtbags on the bill of his hat.
Goydos said midway through the tournament he was offered money by sponsors to ditch the Dirtbags and wear their hat, but he didn't want to screw up the karma. He lost anyway.
Instead he honored his alma mater, Long Beach State. Their teams are officially called the "49ers" but the baseball team has the pseudonym "Dirtbags."
If you look closely you can see the word Dirtbags on the bill of his hat.
Goydos said midway through the tournament he was offered money by sponsors to ditch the Dirtbags and wear their hat, but he didn't want to screw up the karma. He lost anyway.
Monday, March 17, 2008
A Couple of Hours of Heaven
When I die I think heaven will be a little something like what happened on Sunday evening from about 4:30 pm to 6:30. I wish I had known how freakin awesome it was going to be and I would have live blogged it. I also wouldn't have played a few games of Wii bowling (I have awful Wii elbow this morning). But since I didn't know it at the time, all times are approximate.
4:30 - Kansas and Texas engage in one of the best games of the season. Two high-quality teams playing a back and forth game. Very enjoyable.
5:00 - Georgia starts to blow a big lead, raising the possibility that their Cinderella run through the SEC Tournament would fall short. With Georgia's lead down to 5, Billy Humphrey nails a 3, and Bill Raftery yells "onions!"
5:30 - Tiger Woods is battling Bart Bryant in the Arnold Palmer Invitational. Bryant has a couple long putts but just misses them, leaving the door ajar for Tiger. Tiger nails a 24 foot putt for birdie on 18 to win his 5th conseuctive PGA event. Was there ever any doubt? What makes this even better is that Mike and the Mad Dog completely wrote him off on Friday because he was down 7 strokes.
5:45 - The Rockets, locked in a tight game with the Lakers, go on a crazy run (fast-breaking with a 10 point lead and 2 minutes to go, Jim Boeheim must have been turning over in his grave) to win their 22nd straight game.
6:00 - Selection Show. March Madness officially begins.
4:30 - Kansas and Texas engage in one of the best games of the season. Two high-quality teams playing a back and forth game. Very enjoyable.
5:00 - Georgia starts to blow a big lead, raising the possibility that their Cinderella run through the SEC Tournament would fall short. With Georgia's lead down to 5, Billy Humphrey nails a 3, and Bill Raftery yells "onions!"
5:30 - Tiger Woods is battling Bart Bryant in the Arnold Palmer Invitational. Bryant has a couple long putts but just misses them, leaving the door ajar for Tiger. Tiger nails a 24 foot putt for birdie on 18 to win his 5th conseuctive PGA event. Was there ever any doubt? What makes this even better is that Mike and the Mad Dog completely wrote him off on Friday because he was down 7 strokes.
5:45 - The Rockets, locked in a tight game with the Lakers, go on a crazy run (fast-breaking with a 10 point lead and 2 minutes to go, Jim Boeheim must have been turning over in his grave) to win their 22nd straight game.
6:00 - Selection Show. March Madness officially begins.
Where's the Beef?
BEEF is the mnemonic device used to teach kids how to shoot free throws.
It stands for balance, eyes, elbow and follow-through.
Chuck Hayes of the Houston Rockets embodies none of those principles when he shoots free throws.
Hayes is shooting 43% (6-14) from the line this year, but he has made his last 5 free throws.
Charles Barkley uses that same form on the golf course.
It stands for balance, eyes, elbow and follow-through.
Chuck Hayes of the Houston Rockets embodies none of those principles when he shoots free throws.
Hayes is shooting 43% (6-14) from the line this year, but he has made his last 5 free throws.
Charles Barkley uses that same form on the golf course.
Friday, January 11, 2008
What I Should Have Said Theater
This is what Tiger Woods should have said about a comment by Golf Channel anchor Kelly Tilghman, who said the only way for young golfers to compete with Tiger Woods was to "lynch him in a back alley."
"Kelly and I are friends, and I have a great deal of respect for Kelly. Regardless of the choice of words used, I know unequivocally that there was no ill-intent in her comments. I consider the story a non-issue."
Amazingly, that is exactly what Tiger Woods said (give or take a few pronouns since it was released through his agent it was done in the third person). That is exactly why people of all races respect Tiger Woods because he carries himself with class, grace and frequently uses common sense. Unlike the idiot race baiters who are once again trying to gain power by bringing down a white person. In most of these cases the comments are pretty innocuous (something about fried chicken or nappy hair), but in this case lynching was definitely the wrong word to use. But intent matters here. She didn't mean it in a racial sense, she was laughing and joking and used the wrong word. That is not a crime against humanity. Kudos to Tiger Woods for having the balls to do what's right and not punish a woman for a simple stupid mistake. By the way, the Golf Channel caved and suspended Tilghman for two weeks. It will be interesting to see if they can resist the pressure to fire her that is already starting to build.
"Kelly and I are friends, and I have a great deal of respect for Kelly. Regardless of the choice of words used, I know unequivocally that there was no ill-intent in her comments. I consider the story a non-issue."
Amazingly, that is exactly what Tiger Woods said (give or take a few pronouns since it was released through his agent it was done in the third person). That is exactly why people of all races respect Tiger Woods because he carries himself with class, grace and frequently uses common sense. Unlike the idiot race baiters who are once again trying to gain power by bringing down a white person. In most of these cases the comments are pretty innocuous (something about fried chicken or nappy hair), but in this case lynching was definitely the wrong word to use. But intent matters here. She didn't mean it in a racial sense, she was laughing and joking and used the wrong word. That is not a crime against humanity. Kudos to Tiger Woods for having the balls to do what's right and not punish a woman for a simple stupid mistake. By the way, the Golf Channel caved and suspended Tilghman for two weeks. It will be interesting to see if they can resist the pressure to fire her that is already starting to build.
Tuesday, June 19, 2007
Tiger Cub
Nine months ago Tiger Woods made a hole in one.
Monday his wife gave birth to a baby girl.
They named her Sam Alexis Woods.
Monday his wife gave birth to a baby girl.
They named her Sam Alexis Woods.
Wednesday, November 23, 2005
Enjoy Your Stay Tiger!
Tiger Woods, Phil Mickelson and Vijay Singh are all competing in the Grand Slam of Golf at the Poipu Bay Golf Course at the beautiful Grand Hyatt Resort in Kauai. Mrs. Poop and I stayed there on our honeymoon. Nicest hotel ever. Golf course looked great, but I think greens fees were about $250. I hope Tiger has the root beer float at the clubhouse restaurant. Although when we were there they had no root beer so they made us Coke floats and didn't charge us. I also hope Tiger gets the effeminate waiter who laughed at my pirate's booty t-shirt.
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