Go Away

The New York Jets are having a crisis, on the field, in the front office and even in the stands. Their lovable unofficial mascot, Fireman Ed is retiring. I don't really give two shits about Fireman Ed. I thought he was cool at first, when he was just a devoted fan who cared passionately about the team.

But as time passed his schtick grew old, lost its novelty and the notoriety seemed to go to his head.
And evidently I'm not the only one who feels this way, Juice even told me I shouldn't write this post because Fireman Ed isn't important enough.
And while neither Juice nor I would ever fight Fireman Ed or insult him over this but some fans did. And that is why Fireman Ed is retiring. According to him, too many fans have taken out their frustrations with the team on him. At games, in the bathroom, in the parking lot, people yell at him like he is part of the team, he isn't, or they think his tickets are comped, they're not.
So I have no sympathy for Fireman Ed, he milked his very benign gimmick for all it's worth and now, appropriately it is time for him to move on.
But if I had to choose a dog in this fight, I would pick Fireman Ed over the drunk, obnoxious louts like those heard here berating the Jets as they went into the locker room at halftime of the Thanksgiving Massacre against the Patriots.

Rex Ryan's Wife Puts Her Best Foot Forward

Rex Ryan basically admits his wife is in the foot fetish video. He says "it's a personal matter" over and over again. If it wasn't her, he would have just said "it's not her."





That even sounds like Rex's voice, and I'm sure it is.

The question is: why is this such a big deal? Why is this personally embarrassing? Note: I'm only talking about the videos, not the contest of the profiles allegedly appearing on certain websites. His wife is not doing any wrong, morally or legally. If she wants to show off her feet to foot fetishists on the internet (like TallSkott) that’s her business. Deviance is in the eye of the beholder. She has lovely feet and if someone derives sexual pleasure from looking at them that’s their problem and not hers. Or Rex Ryan’s. I understand why it’s a news story, people are interested, even I’m interested. I just don’t see how any part of this is can be construed as negative or personally embarrassing.

Here’s the best analogy I can make: I’m sure plenty of athletes are married to Victoria’s Secret models. They walk around in their underwear and put the video on TV, the internet you name it. They have nice boobs, she has nice feet. And I bet a lot more guys jerk off looking at Adriana Lima’s tits than Michelle Ryan’s feet.

So can someone please give me one good reason why the Ryans should be embarrassed or ashamed of this?

New York's Coming Population Explosion

"I have seven kids that live in five different states. I made some wrong decisions in my first two years in the league. Now I have to take on the responsibility of being a father to my kids. I can separate my personal life and off-the-field issues from football...The mothers [and I] try to work out a schedule where I can see my kids. I talk to them on IChat and Skype. We try to find different ways for me to be in their lives, no matter how it is.''

That quote comes from the newest Jet Antonio Cromartie. Moving to the East Coast may allow him to expand his reach to a few more states. New York and New Jersey should be no problem assuming they're not already on his list.
Cromartie is in the last year of a 5-year, $12 million contract.
He'll be paid $1.7 million this year but he can't wait until the season starts to get his first paycheck. He asked the Jets to front him $500,000 so he can stay current on his child support payments.
How much child support could this poor guy be on the hook for?
$4,000 a month seems outrageous and even that only amounts to about $336,000 for a year.
If he really has his life together the Jets got a good player for a bargain basement price because the Chargers don't want to deal with his issues. If not they only have one year at a reasonable cost.

Rex Ryan Topless

Jets head coach Rex Ryan attended an NHL game, so he decided to wear a hockey jersey. Apparently any hockey jersey will do because Ryan wore a Flyers jersey to a Panthers-Hurricanes game.
The quick witted Canes Ice Girls came over to offer Ryan a wardrobe change, presenting him with a Canes jersey (presumably XXXL).
Unfortunately, when he takes off his Flyers jersey, his undershirt comes with (the same thing happened to me at the allergist) exposing his prodigious gut.