She Can Handle a Flagpole

After Paul McCartney's mumbling and perhaps drunken rendition of "Hey Jude" the most talked about event at the Opening Ceremonies was the Norwegian team's entrance. Because they were led by flag bearer Mira Veras (Veraas) Larsen. She is a sprint canoeist, and she is married to one of Norway's other great canoeists. And they left their wedding in a canoe, instead of a car with beer cans tied to it.

Hot Racist Kicked Off Olympic Team

Greek triple jumper Voula Papachristou was kicked off the Olympic team for this racist tweet:

"With so many Africans in Greece, the West Nile mosquitoes will be getting homemade food!!!"

It's a shame about her being a miserable racist because she is really freakin hot.

Song of the Week

"Full Moon" - Brandy
I was a little puzzled about what to do with 2002, but then I remembered how much I liked this song.

Red-Shirting

I have known for quite a while that CBS News was a hopelessly biased news organization. But I hoped in non-political coverage it would be a little more fair. I was wrong.



This casts parents who red-shirt as even villains who are trying to push their children into success in sports at the expense of other kids.

In our school district the cutoff date is October 1. So our August babies will always be among the youngest in their class.

We briefly talked about red-shirting Chase when we sent him to preschool a couple weeks after his second birthday, while some kids were just a couple months short of turning 3. Chase has done well in preschool and his teachers saw no need to keep him back. So he'll go to kindergarten in the fall as scheduled.

We were also contemplating it with Julian, who seemed in greater need of maturity, but lately he has had an explosion of language, and coupled with his enormous size, red-shirting likely won't be necessary in his case either.

But what if we felt it was? That should be a parents decision. I resent the implication that red-shirting is cheating, or somehow harming the other kids. And even if it were, why should what's marginally better for some other child supersede what you feel is much better for your own?

I also resent the implication that this is just for fathers who want their sons to be sports stars. What's so wrong with wanting your child not to be one of the smallest kids, to avoid bullying? Or for him to at least be good enough at sports to build his confidence, to make him be the first kid picked not the last, to make him feel an important part of the group instead of a benchwarmer. I think all parents want those things for their kids. Regardless of what that old fossil Morley Safer thinks.

Am I Supposed to Be Sad About This?

When I saw this e-card I immediately thought of one person: Jared G. He was exactly the person described here. He played football, he was nominally cool, girls thought he was cute and he thought he was hot shit. One time, on the bus back from a trip to Quebec, I was trying to sleep and he was fucking with me. Putting his hands in my face, grazing my nose, so I jumped up, slapped his hands away and told him to cut the shit. He punched me in the face and broke my glasses. While we never had another incident and I seldom was around him, I always felt like he thought he was better than me because he had gotten the best of me that day, and because he was cooler in high school.

Last week Jared G. killed himself. He shot himself in his car in the Village Greens Shopping Center in Arden Heights. He was married with a young child. After college at CSI, Jared opened up a beer distributor on Manor Rd (or bought the existing one) with at least one of his other high school football buddies who also lacked skills translatable to a job in the real world. Evidently that venture failed because in the article about his death the Advance says he was driving a cement truck.

They say living well is the best revenge so I guess it would be hard to deny I got revenge on Jared. Me working where I work and him driving a cement truck is the real world equivalent of me being on the football team and him running track.

I wouldn't say I am happy he's dead, nor that I smiled when I heard that he died, but I don't feel any sadness for him either. I am sad that his young child has to grow up without a father, but other than that nothing. Obviously his life didn't turn out the way he hoped when he was walking around the Susan Wagner hallways in his cool football jacket with the white leather sleeves. Mine did. I don't want to sound angry about an incident from 17 or 18 years ago, because I seldom if ever thought about him, until that e-card reminded me. But it does give me a weird sense of satisfaction. Sort of like Walt, at the end of Season 4, "I won."

This is not the first time I've been insensitive to someone who committed suicide. Read the comments attached to this post to find out what a jerk I am.

Song of the Week

"End of the Road" - Boyz II Men
20 years ago this song was #1. Amazing.

Lead By Example

When you thought I wasn't looking,
I saw you hang my first painting on the refrigerator,
and I wanted to paint another one.

When you thought I wasn't looking,
I saw you feed a stray cat,
and I thought it was good to be kind to animals.

When you thought I wasn't looking,
I saw you make my favorite cake for me,
and I knew that little things are special.

When you thought I wasn't looking,
I felt you kiss me goodnight,
and I felt loved.

When you thought I wasn't looking,
I saw tears come from your eyes,
and I learned it's alright to cry.

When you thought I wasn't looking,
I saw that you cared,
and I wanted to be everything that I could be.

When you thought I wasn't looking, I was and I saw.
Thank you for all the things you did,
when you thought I wasn't looking.

-Author Unknown

The Best Show Ever

"Breaking Bad" is the best show in the history of television. And the finale of Season 4 is the best hour of TV I've ever seen. If you have never watched the show, I'm going to make one more plea to get you to do so before Season 5 starts this week on July 15.
Everybody loved "The Sopranos" right? It was a great show. It was about a mobster, but it was about so much more than that, it was about his family, his personal relationships and how he grows and changes. But it also had great action, violence and conflict.
Breaking Bad has all of that (though not as much humor or sex) and much, much more. But Breaking Bad is written so well. It has incredible subtlety. The action (and there is plenty of action, the show never gets boring) is driven by tiny plot twists which explode into huge revelations.

I have never met anyone who watched the show and didn't love it.
So if I've finally convinced you to watch and find out how Walt went from feckless dweeb to badass, stop reading now.
If you've been watching all this time (Billy and Damino are the only Poopheads I know of) then keep reading.
If you still aren't going to watch, then you're a moron.




Here is why I love this show so much: it combines the visceral action and violence that so many people like with the subtle twists, plot advancements and character development that make it such a great show to think about and talk about afterwards.

The season 4 finale was a perfect example. It had the explosive action scene, with the drama building beautifully through Hector's pained facial expressions. And the money shot with Gus's new face.



But it also had the beautiful reveal at the very end. The lilies whose berries had been used to poison Brock were growing in Walt's backyard.



That one little shot of the flowerpot changed the entire trajectory of the final season.

And there have been so many moments like that, brief moments, innocent comments, that completely changed the show.

For instance, Walt not wanting Hank to give the credit to Gail, casually commenting that he couldn't be the mastermind. That simple comment forced Hank to redouble his efforts, driving all the action last season. The search, Gus's effort to kill Walt, Walt's eventual plan to kill Gus. It was all set in motion because Walt wouldn't allow Hank to think Gail was responsible for the meth craze sweeping the Southwestern United States.

It's a far cry from the feckless dweeb who was washing cars in episode 1, embarrassed and belittled when his own students drove fancier cars than he did.

And that, to me, is the coolest thing about this whole show. It's how Walt's character has grown and developed. He may have started as a loser but the time when he stood up to the guys who were making fun of Walt Jr. something changed inside him.

I can't wait to see where they go with season 5 but I'm mostly happy they're going to end it now, one or two seasons too early, better than a season too late. Or four seasons too late in the case of Lost.
I can't wait to see what they do as a resolution. Will Walt immediately try to be the drug kingpin of the southwest, filling Gus's void? I don't think so immediately, but maybe eventually.
Will Jesse find out Walt poisoned the boy? Seems like this conflict will arise at some point, but not right away.
Will Hank apprehend Walt? This is how I think series will come to its end, with Hank closing in. Either he catches Walt or kills Walt, or Walt kills him, something like that is what I expect.
But here is what I would like to see: Walt tries to stop cooking, it's getting too dangerous. But Jesse is pressuring him and Skyler wants more money and he's getting bored and missing the excitement and danger of his old life. So he starts cooking again, and selling the meth, and the money is rolling and his cancer comes back. 3 months to live...

Song of the Week

"Eye of the Tiger" - Survivor
I can't believe it's been 30 years since this song came out. It might seem like an obvious choice for 1982 but that's why I like it. This song takes you back to that time.

3000 Words

The $18.3M first prize for the million-dollar buy-in tournament at the World Series of Poker, won by Antonio Esfandiari.

Half Pooh, Half Poop



Coors Light uses a famous Seinfeld quote ("they're real and they're spectacular") in an ad. Jerry Seinfeld must have gotten paid for it because he looks pleased.

It Happens To a Lot of Guys

Watch San Diego's "Big Bay Boom" fireworks display, in its entirety.



A technical glitch caused all the fireworks on 4 barges to go off at the same time. It should have lasted for 18-20 minutes. It was more like 20 seconds.

20 seconds, that's it?
That's what she said.

The sad thing is, people camped out for hours to get a prime viewing spot, and this is all they got.

At least she did see fireworks.

Song of the Week

"Precious and Few" - Climax
I decided to go with something different for 1972. There were some great soul and R&B joints out that year but I like the slow pace of this one, typifies the 1970s easy listening genre.

Product Review: Bacon Sundae

A lot of fanfare surrounded the release of Burger King's bacon sundae. Someone at work bought about 8 of them for some reason and had an extra one, so I decided to try one.

The bacon is not hot (obviously) and it's a little chewy and a little soggy, so the three big pieces that come on top don't taste all that great. Once you get past that there's smaller pieces of bacon, like bacon bits but real bacon, mixed with the vanilla ice cream which tastes great. It's a unique combination of sweet and salty but it goes together pretty well. Once you eat the bacon, and there isn't that much bacon, you are just enjoying vanilla ice cream mixed with chocolate sauce at the bottom.





It tastes pretty good, and I would recommend trying it once. But after that you will probably never want to eat it again. You can have a better ice cream if you want ice cream, and you can have hot crispy bacon if you want bacon, so I really can't see eating this thing twice.

No Turkey Legs in Chicago

Taste of Chicago will not be the same this year. Tim McGivern has been providing turkey legs at Taste since 1981.
“Over the last couple of years, I’ve had health issues; my knee and spine are not good. My doctors more or less advised against it,” McGivern told the Chicago Tribune.
The same thing happened at Taste of Warsaw and there will be no ice cubes this year.

At least those hearty Chicagoans can enjoy these pictures of me eating turkey legs.

Song of the Week

"Duke of Earl" - Gene Chandler
One of the best doo-wop songs ever and my choice for best song of 1962. This song is 50 years old. If Papa Poop ever read this blog he would feel very old.

Can't Take a Compliment, Or a Joke

Women's groups are furious over this sign at the MarketFair Mall in New Jersey. The signs says "We apologize for the whistling construction workers, but man you look good. So will we soon, pardon our dust, dirt and other assorted inconveniences."




This offensive sign makes a joke of the horrible street crime of whistling at women. I don't understand it from personal experience but I suppose I can understand how being whistled at can be annoying perhaps even offensive.
But I don't see how making a joke about something upsetting is equally upsetting. Getting whistled at by construction workers is not assault, it's a nuisance. A sign about getting whistled at is none of those.

I Almost Had to Use My AK

While driving home on my birthday I found myself in surprisingly heavy traffic on Fair Lawn Avenue. I needed to be in the left lane to make a turn at the next intersection. Traffic was slow so I weaseled my way in. Even though I had my signal on the guy behind me chose to lean on his horn. After I made my left turn, he followed behind me. So I pulled over to let him by, just to get away from him.

He stopped next to me and screamed out the window:
“What’s your fuckin problem?” (He’s screaming at me, and I’m the one with the problem?)
“We were going 5 miles an hour you could have let me in.” (I didn’t scream. I said it so quietly he had to ask me to repeat myself.)
“I wasn’t behind you, I was alongside of you, you cut me off.” (He was behind me, or else I would have hit him when I changed lanes. I do admit to cutting him off, but only because he wasn’t courteous enough to see that I was trying to get over and let me in.)
“Just go, move on with your day.” (I was done with this discussion.)
“Go fuck yourself pal.” (Then he drove away, making a u-turn, meaning he wasn’t going the same way, he purposely followed me.)


But don't worry this didn't ruin my birthday. I actually enjoyed it, for three reasons.
I enjoy new experiences.
I like having stories to tell, keeps this blog interesting for the Poopheads with vaginas who get tired of the constant sports coverage.
And the biggest reason I was happy about it, I recognized the guy. He's an annoying father I occasionally see at the playground. He saw me wearing a Syracuse shirt once (or twice, or ten times, I pretty much wear one every day) and he told me he was raised in that area but didn't go to SU. Every time I see him he chews my ear off about SU sports (I believe the first time I ever saw him was the day Fab Melo got suspended for the tournament).
And now, I won't ever have to talk to him again. And it didn't even cost me $20 ("A Bronx Tale" reference).

A Beatdown is in Order

We all know kids can be cruel but this takes it to a new level. Four junior high school students in Rochester, NY harassed a bus monitor so horribly they reduced her to tears. You don’t have to watch the entire 10-minute video, just enough to get the idea.





They called her fat, a troll, poor, stupid and then at the very end came the clincher. One of the students said “you don’t have a family because they all killed themselves because they didn’t want to be near you.” Little did they know (or maybe they did know), her son killed himself 10 years ago. The video cuts off right after that remark so we don’t know how she reacted. But when I first heard this story I said she should have just ignored them. They were kids being kids calling her fat and she should have just let it go. But it went on for 10 minutes. And then that personal comment at the end. She should have killed them all.



The video went viral and an effort was started to raise $5,000 to send her on a nice vacation. It already has $208,000 as of mid-Thursday.

And He's Still Better Than Jon Sterling

Texas Rangers announcer Dave Barnett had some kind of on-air mental health incident. Watch, it starts at 45 seconds in (cuz MLB yanked down all other videos):



"2-1 game, tying run at second, leadoff single by Chase Headley. Go-ahead run is at fifth on what Adams is insisting on calling it a botched robbery. Actually happened was his henchman took a piece literally out of, uh, its..."

Barnett says he was just having a severe migraine. Seems like it might have been something more serious than that. Though he did finish the game without anymore gibberish. Not as funny though as the time reporter Serene Branson had a stroke on live TV.

Headline suggested by DKL

Song of the Week

"Real Love" - Eric Benet
Three good reasons to love this song, Eric Benet, falsetto and lyrics that perfectly describe my marriage to Mrs. Poop.

"I love you
Not just for who you are
But the way you made
A better man out of me"

"Now you got your funny ways girl
Lord knows I've got mine
Still we keep on getting better
And better, all the time
Cuz we got something real, babe"

"We can't go wrong
if we just hold on
Ain't nothing stronger
Cuz we've got something real
real love, real love
In a world full of make-believe"

"I'll bet everything, everything, on you and me"