The Poop

Friday, April 27, 2007

Former Mets Employee Deals Steroids

"A former employee of the New York Mets has pleaded guilty to distributing performance-enhancing drugs to dozens of major league players between 1995 and 2005, and is cooperating with baseball's steroids investigation.

Kirk Radomski, 37, admitted providing anabolic steroids, human growth hormone, Clenbuterol, amphetamines and other drugs to "dozens of current and former Major League Baseball players, and associates, on teams throughout Major League Baseball."

Radomski, a former Mets batboy who also worked as an equipment manager and clubhouse assistant while with the team from 1985-95, pleaded guilty to one count of distribution of a controlled substance -- anabolic steroids -- and one count of money laundering.

Radomski, who faces up to 25 years in prison and $500,000 in fines, was considered by authorities to be the chief supplier of drugs for baseball players after the feds shut down BALCO in 2003.

The affadavit contained blacked-out information, including what appeared to be players' names.

Sports Illustrated, quoting from the warrant, reported "numerous significant deposits from current and former [Major League Baseball] players and some affiliated individuals" were made to Radomski. He received more than $23,000, pulled from more than 20 different payments between 2003-05 that are alleged to have been made in conjunction with steroids purchases.

Howard Johnson, a Mets infielder in the 1980s and currently the team's first-base coach, told The Associated Press he remembered Radomski.

"He was a clubhouse kid, one of several, one of the kids that were there," Johnson said before the Mets played at Washington on Friday night.

Former Mets pitcher Ron Darling, now a team broadcaster, said he didn't remember Radomski.

"We were surprised and disappointed to learn of the guilty plea today," the Mets said in a statement. "The conduct in question is diametrically opposed to the values and standards of the Mets organization and our owners.

"We are and always have been adamantly opposed to the use of performance-enhancing drugs and continue to support Major League Baseball's efforts to eradicate any such use in our game," the team said."

This guy supposedly started dealing after he left the Mets. But he did use his clubhouse contacts. He also may have seen steroid use during his tenure with the team.

They're Good For His Heart

Hugh Grant got arrested in England for throwing a tupperware container of baked beans at a paparazzo.

1978 World Series of Poker

Part I:

Part II:

Part III:

Aired on CBS, Brent Musburger joins Jimmy The Greek. 42 entrants this year. Some guy in a top hat went all in with A-Q against pocket jacks. When a Queen came on the flop he lifted his hat off his head. He’s sort of dressed like the monopoly man. Thirty years ago and you still heard interviews about the young aggressive players coming up and chasing out the old guys. Johnny Moss announced his retirement after losing three straight hands with the ace-high flush, a wheel straight and pocket kings. Jimmy The Greek just mentioned a bet he made with Crandall Addington, from the 1973 World Series. They still show player’s wives on the rail. I think Shirley Baldwin might be hot, but the footage is grainy. The head’s up part, just the head’s up match between Bobby Baldwin and Crandall Addington lasted about four hours. Even with a straight Baldwin wouldn’t push all in. He would have won too because the river card that gave him the straight gave Addington trip 3s. Baldwin won with queens over 9s.

Syracuse Has a Women's Basketball Team?

Syracuse University forward Fantasia Goodwin gave birth last week.
That's two months after the end of the basketball season.
A season in which she played 28 games.
All of them except for the last one.
Because she finally told the coaching staff she was pregnant before the final game.
7 months pregnant.
How did people not notice?

Forbidden Kiss

An arrest warrant is out for Richard Gere in India for this kiss on Bollywood sexpot Shilpa Shetty. India's strict laws forbid kissing in public. And this wasn't a kiss, more like a sexual assault. Look how touchy he is with her, and how uncomfortable she gets.

Can't blame a guy for trying.

1973 World Series of Poker

I think we've all seen the World Series of Poker from 2003 - 2006 a million times. Thanks to youtube a lot of old Main Events are also available. I'm going to watch most of them (I've seen the mid-90s ones on ESPN Classic) and I encourage you do to do the same. I'll embed the clips then post my analysis at the end.

Part I:

Part II:

Part III:

Part IV:

Part V:

Hosted by Jimmy “The Greek.” Still $10,000 buy-in, but only 13 players. Largest field ever. Jimmy The Greek refers to it as an “extra-large” field. Amarillo Slim and Puggy Pearson are both smoking at the table. The Greek said it was three hours before the first meaningful encounter (Slim caught Jack Strauss on a bluff). The first knockout took about five hours. It was an amateur, the only one in the field. They actually made book on the event and he was listed as a 50 to 1 underdog. Defending champ Amarillo Slim got knocked out by runner-runner flush cards. Some things never change. Doyle went out 10th. He used to be a high school principal and has a master’s degree in education. The young prospect in the field was 33 years old, ancient by today’s standards. This had to have been the first feature ever done on chip tricks. The whole thing was shot more as a documentary than a card tournament. We know they didn’t have pocket cams but they didn’t even have a good overhead cam to show the board. Puggy Pearson beat Johnny Moss when his ace held up against Moss’ up and down straight draw.

Big Brother is Watching

Thanks to SCZA, I signed up for sitemeter, which gives me extensive information about traffic on this site.

I see where people are logging in from and when. It tells me how long people spend at the site, and what pages they click on.

Most important I see how people get here. Less than half of you type the address or use a bookmark. But those are my regular Poop readers. A lot of hits come from referrals, mostly from Google image searches. For instance if you google Michelle Damon or Elsa Benitez the first picture that comes up on the main google search page is from my blog. Those two sexy women drove a lot of traffic to the site.

I think most websites get this information but it only means something to me because I know where most of you live and work. TallSkott and Greco logged on from their work servers. I saw only one visit from Denver, Colorado yesterday so I wonder if one of the Freeds was too busy, or if the Poop is something they share together. Step On Me was a little distressed that I knew she logged on at 7:45, stayed on for 8 minutes and clicked on a picture of a very cute little girl.

But I promise the novelty of having this info at my fingertips will wear off very quickly.

Plus I have to find out who my readers in India, China, Kuwait, Israel, Australia, Belgium and Italy are. I got hits from all those countries yesterday.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Draft Gurus Unite!

I have created a group (called Paul's Poop, no password required) for ESPN.com's NFL Draft forecast.

The game is simple. Pick the first 15 guys in the correct order (regardless of team), and win a nice prize.
The grand prize is a Hummer. Not a hummer, PPD, capital H.

C'Mon Tim, You Should Know This

This reminds me of the time when none of us remembered that Jerome Bettis had asthma during a game of Taboo. Juice was furious and scolded us afterwards. I bet Russert got much worse from Brian Williams.

A Little Like a Bar Mitzvah Down Here

Papa Poop, Master Bates and I all love Ian Eagle, or as we call him Mr. EE-ahg-lay. But this video of him during a commercial of the Wizards-Cavs game, when he clearly didn't expect to be on camera, is quite amusing. Althought maybe Ian needs to loosen up a little. And Dr. Jack needs to wake up.

The Painted Sock?

Former Mets broadcaster, Gary Thorne, who currently works for the Orioles, said on air that Curt Schilling's famous bloody sock from the 2004 postseason was a PR stunt. And the redness on the sock was paint, not blood.

Gary Thorne: "It was painted. Doug Mirabelli confessed up to it after. It was all for PR."

Doug Mirabelli: "I never said that. I know it was blood. Everybody knows it was blood."

The Hall of Fame has the sock from the World Series says Schilling delivered it himself and they think it's real because the stain is now brown, as blood stains normally change color over time.

The New Adventures of Old Mike/New Christine

LA Times Columnist makes a stunning announcement in today's column.

He starts it like this:

"During my 23 years with The Times' sports department, I have held a wide variety of roles and titles. Tennis writer. Angels beat reporter. Olympics writer. Essayist. Sports media critic. NFL columnist. Recent keeper of the Morning Briefing flame.

Today I leave for a few weeks' vacation, and when I return, I will come back in yet another incarnation.

As Christine."

Very interesting. Good thing he doesn't have to interview Tim Hardaway. I really don't know much about transsexuals but I hope this change makes Mike, I mean Christine, a happier person.

Who the Fuck Drives a Maserati?

Billy asked me that very question last week.
Now I have his answer: every thug's dream wife, Eve aka e-v-e.
She crashed her gold Maserati and then got arrested for DUI.

I Guess He Doesn't Want Gay Men Looking At Him

from NY Post's Page6:

YOU can't be too careful, especially when you're high-profile anchorman Anderson Cooper. Cyber gossip Janet Charlton reports the white-haired CNN star regularly works out at the Equinox gym in the Time Warner Center, where he attracts a lot of attention from hard bodies of both genders. "So he takes precautions," Charlton reports. "Everyone knows camera phones are easy to smuggle anywhere, so sensible Anderson reportedly showers in his underwear. Boxer briefs, to be exact."

Pittsburgh: A Great Place to Live, But I Wouldn't Want to Live There

Pittsburgh was ranked the nation's "most livable city" by Rand McNally.
379 metropolitan areas were ranked in 9 categories and the lowest score won.
Basically Pittsburgh was average in every category which was good enough.
New York could never win because it's so unaffordable.

The President Dances Like David Green

This was at a Malaria Awareness Day event.

I Was Mad When My Dad Spanked Me

This guy makes Alec Baldwin look like Ward Cleaver.
Byron Perkins convinced a judge, by crying, to let him out of jail so he could donate his kidney to his ailing son, Destin.
Before the last test, he took off with his girlfriend. Last night, after more than a year they caught this son of a bitch in Mexico.
I'd like all Poopheads to call their dads today and thank them for not being this guy.

A New Planet?

European astronomers have found a planet that looks similar to Earth.
They are still looking for a planet that looks like Uranus.

Many of you might suggest that I am stealing the Uranus joke gimmick from PTI's Tony Kornheiser. But that's not so. I have been making Uranus jokes ever since one night, probably more than 20 years ago, when trying to avoid going to sleep, Master Bates said to me "Hey Paul, you think anyone will ever land on Uranus?"

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Growing Old

Be wary of birthdays that end in 9 because one beginning with a new number is right around the corner.
This year I turn 29, and a few months after that I’ll become a daddy.
I’ve already started to think like a dad a little bit.
I see a guy in my neighborhood walking his dog with one hand and holding onto his little girl with the other, as she is learning to roller skate.
I talked to a friend the other day about the beauty of baseball. He mentions that baseball is a game best enjoyed by fathers and sons. The first thought that comes to mind is not that of my own father, even though he’s part of the reason why I love baseball so much. The ball rolling through Buckner’s legs is a much bigger part, but thanks anyway dad. The first thought that comes to my mind is of someday taking my own son to Shea Stadium, I mean CitiField.
Buying him a hot dog, teaching him how to score; explaining the subtleties like the difference between a stolen base and a defensive indifference; or a wild pitch versus a passed ball.
Maybe I’ll have a little girl. And I’ll have to comb her hair. Buy her pink clothes. I hope Mrs. Poop can deal with the puberty related issues like training bras and menstruation.
I can’t wait to teach my kid to love my dog. To refer to a lick on the face as a kiss. To watch with wonder as our super dog flies through his hoop. To refer to him as “my big brother Diesel.” I wonder if “woof” will be the baby’s first word.
When I walk around the neighborhood I check out houses and think to myself “that would be a nice yard for kids to play in.”
But sometimes I worry. What if my kid were in that classroom in Virginia Tech. You spend your whole life saving for college and some dickwad ends your kid’s dreams and his life.
And I don’t have to worry about that for at least another 14 years. Even if our child inherits my precocious intelligence I doubt Mrs. Poop will let him/her go to college before age 14. Maybe we’ll all be living in bulletproof bubbles by then. Or colleges we be abolished because of the impending threat and everyone will have class on the internet.
You know you’re in love when someone else’s happiness is more important than your own. When not only do you sit through a concert by a children’s singer, but you enjoy watching the kids dance and jump around.
And someday I’ll be watching with pride as it’s my kid buzzing like a bumblebee at the Laurie Berkner concert.
Or my kid will be going to the first day of school.
Or striking out with two men on in the bottom of the 6th in Little League, or the Pony Tail league.
And going off to college.
And getting married.
And eventually my kid will be having kids.
I’ll be a grandfather.
I’m growing old.

Dwyane Wade's House

If you liked LeBron's, Carmelo's and Steve Alford's, you are going to love Dwyane Wade's house. He built the Miami area house only two years ago and he's already selling it, completely with memorabilia, for the bargain price of only $8.9 million.

The aerial view