Saturday, June 26, 2010
Patriotism Pays
On the way out of Vegas for the Conch's bachelor party I stopped by the sportsbook to pick up some long-term wagers to make this summer's sporting events more fun. My bet-with-your-heart wager on the USA to win group C pays off to the tune of 2.5 to 1. Not bad.
Landon Donovan Wants His Hot Wife Back
Pretty much the only reason a man does anything is because he hopes it will impress a girl. A hot girl he hopes to sleep with.
Such was surely the case for Landon Donovan who is a talented soccer player but kind of dorky in appearance and especially voice.
It should come as no surprise then than as soon as Donovan buried that shot in the back of the net to beat Algeria, he began thinking of a way to use it to get his hot wife back.
It especially came as no surprise to me because I didn't even know that he had split with Bianca Kajlich, the hottie from Rules of Engagement.
As Reissberg was informing me that they split (married in 2006, split in 2009, but divorce is not official), Donovan was on TV giving an interview, skip forward to see how it ends.
"Hi Bianca"
And now there are reports that this ploy worked. Bianca was so impressed that he was thinking of her at this important moment that she wants him back.
I hope these two kids rekindle their lost love.
Such was surely the case for Landon Donovan who is a talented soccer player but kind of dorky in appearance and especially voice.
It should come as no surprise then than as soon as Donovan buried that shot in the back of the net to beat Algeria, he began thinking of a way to use it to get his hot wife back.
It especially came as no surprise to me because I didn't even know that he had split with Bianca Kajlich, the hottie from Rules of Engagement.
As Reissberg was informing me that they split (married in 2006, split in 2009, but divorce is not official), Donovan was on TV giving an interview, skip forward to see how it ends.
"Hi Bianca"
And now there are reports that this ploy worked. Bianca was so impressed that he was thinking of her at this important moment that she wants him back.
I hope these two kids rekindle their lost love.
Friday, June 25, 2010
Where Did I Leave My Phone?
A Paraguay fan nervously watches the game while everyone else watches her.
Thursday, June 24, 2010
Why Adolf Hitler is a Hot Topic Today
I was more than a little distressed this morning when I saw the trending topics on yahoo.com. There in the number two spot was Adolf Hitler.
Turns out there is Hitler news. How does a guy who died 65 years ago make news?
Adolf Hitler, while in jail, asked Mercedes-Benz for a loan to buy one of their limousines until his royalties for "Mein Kampf" came through, a letter shows.
Hitler wrote the letter in 1924 while imprisoned for his role in Nazi party's failed attempt to seize power in Munich, Germany.
While in jail, Hitler wrote "Mein Kampf," his blueprint for eventually taking power in Germany. In a letter to a Munich Mercedes-Benz dealer, he requested a loan against expected royalties from the book.
"But the hardest thing for me at the moment lies in the fact that the biggest payment for my work is not expected until the middle of December," the September 1924 letter said.
"So I am compelled to ask for a loan or an advance. Naturally something in the order of several thousand marks would be a big help."
Hitler was released in December 1924. It is unknown whether the Munich dealership did any business with him.
The letter was found at a flea market and authenticated by the Bavarian State Archive in Munich.
It is expected to bring several thousand dollars when it is auctioned in July.
And isn't that the most disturbing part? Someone is going to pay thousands of dollars for this. I think the Holocaust Museum in DC should buy it then charge $5 to watch the bonfire in which they burn it.
Turns out there is Hitler news. How does a guy who died 65 years ago make news?
Adolf Hitler, while in jail, asked Mercedes-Benz for a loan to buy one of their limousines until his royalties for "Mein Kampf" came through, a letter shows.
Hitler wrote the letter in 1924 while imprisoned for his role in Nazi party's failed attempt to seize power in Munich, Germany.
While in jail, Hitler wrote "Mein Kampf," his blueprint for eventually taking power in Germany. In a letter to a Munich Mercedes-Benz dealer, he requested a loan against expected royalties from the book.
"But the hardest thing for me at the moment lies in the fact that the biggest payment for my work is not expected until the middle of December," the September 1924 letter said.
"So I am compelled to ask for a loan or an advance. Naturally something in the order of several thousand marks would be a big help."
Hitler was released in December 1924. It is unknown whether the Munich dealership did any business with him.
The letter was found at a flea market and authenticated by the Bavarian State Archive in Munich.
It is expected to bring several thousand dollars when it is auctioned in July.
And isn't that the most disturbing part? Someone is going to pay thousands of dollars for this. I think the Holocaust Museum in DC should buy it then charge $5 to watch the bonfire in which they burn it.
Sue Everybody
Lauren Rosenberg is suing Google for more than $100,000 because she was hit by a car.
What does this have to do with Google?
Rosenberg is from Los Angeles, while visiting Utah she used Google maps for walking directions. She says Google provided unsafe directions.
Google Maps led her to walk on a busy road without sidewalks that was "not reasonably safe for pedestrians."
She claims she was led onto a busy highway and hit by a car "as a direct and proximate cause of defendant Google's careless, reckless and negligent providing of unsafe directions.”
Rosenberg is seeking compensation for unspecified "severe" injuries and lost wages in addition to punitive damages.
The court papers didn't explain why Rosenberg walked along state Route 224 instead of choosing streets with sidewalks.
On its version for computers, Google Maps suggests one alternative for Rosenberg's route. It also highlights a disclaimer: "Use caution -- This route may be missing sidewalks or pedestrian paths."
The mobile version of Google Maps, however, does not come with that warning.
What does this have to do with Google?
Rosenberg is from Los Angeles, while visiting Utah she used Google maps for walking directions. She says Google provided unsafe directions.
Google Maps led her to walk on a busy road without sidewalks that was "not reasonably safe for pedestrians."
She claims she was led onto a busy highway and hit by a car "as a direct and proximate cause of defendant Google's careless, reckless and negligent providing of unsafe directions.”
Rosenberg is seeking compensation for unspecified "severe" injuries and lost wages in addition to punitive damages.
The court papers didn't explain why Rosenberg walked along state Route 224 instead of choosing streets with sidewalks.
On its version for computers, Google Maps suggests one alternative for Rosenberg's route. It also highlights a disclaimer: "Use caution -- This route may be missing sidewalks or pedestrian paths."
The mobile version of Google Maps, however, does not come with that warning.
Wednesday, June 23, 2010
Tuesday, June 22, 2010
What's the Capital of Thailand?
A new form of bullying is sweeping playgrounds across this great nation: sack-tapping.
That’s right, kids are hitting each other in the plums and calling it a game.
14-year-old David Gibbons of Crosby, Minn., had to have his right testicle amputated from being sack tapped in the hallway between classes.
The main reason this game continues, what teen boy wants to fess up to being a victim of a prank involving their genitals?
Once a few aggressive or deviant individuals start engaging in a practice like sack tapping, it can quickly come to seem normal, drawing in other boys who want to feel like part of the majority.
That’s right, kids are hitting each other in the plums and calling it a game.
14-year-old David Gibbons of Crosby, Minn., had to have his right testicle amputated from being sack tapped in the hallway between classes.
The main reason this game continues, what teen boy wants to fess up to being a victim of a prank involving their genitals?
Once a few aggressive or deviant individuals start engaging in a practice like sack tapping, it can quickly come to seem normal, drawing in other boys who want to feel like part of the majority.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Shit My Dad Says
A few months ago the Concierge directed me to a somewhat entertaining Twitter user, @shitmydadsays.
The premise: a guy’s dad says funny things.
I looked at it, laughed and never thought about it again because I didn’t think there was a legitimate father behind these remarks.
But shit my dad says has now become an phenomenon. It’s a best-selling book, and come this fall it will be a sitcom on CBS with William Shatner playing my dad.
And even though it will be spelled “$#*! My Dad Says” and pronounced “(bleep) my dad says” the Parents Television Council is threatening to challenge the broadcast licenses of CBS affiliates over the name.
Tim Winter, president of the Los Angeles-based organization, said he was aware that CBS was developing a series based on the Twitter sensation, but "we couldn't imagine that a network would actually name a program either with an expletive or with the expletive ostensibly bleeped out.
He said he was concerned about parents confronted by promotions for the series when they are watching television with their children.
"It will in no way be indecent and will adhere to all CBS standards," spokesman Phil Gonzales said. "Parents who choose to do so will find the show can easily be blocked using their V Chip."
My dad even responded to the controversy in a tweet:
The premise: a guy’s dad says funny things.
I looked at it, laughed and never thought about it again because I didn’t think there was a legitimate father behind these remarks.
But shit my dad says has now become an phenomenon. It’s a best-selling book, and come this fall it will be a sitcom on CBS with William Shatner playing my dad.
And even though it will be spelled “$#*! My Dad Says” and pronounced “(bleep) my dad says” the Parents Television Council is threatening to challenge the broadcast licenses of CBS affiliates over the name.
Tim Winter, president of the Los Angeles-based organization, said he was aware that CBS was developing a series based on the Twitter sensation, but "we couldn't imagine that a network would actually name a program either with an expletive or with the expletive ostensibly bleeped out.
He said he was concerned about parents confronted by promotions for the series when they are watching television with their children.
"It will in no way be indecent and will adhere to all CBS standards," spokesman Phil Gonzales said. "Parents who choose to do so will find the show can easily be blocked using their V Chip."
My dad even responded to the controversy in a tweet:
Friday, June 18, 2010
I Am a Fashion Trendsetter
For years I have pioneered the socks and sandals trend thanks to my unusually sweaty feet. Now the fashion glitterati are catching on. Celebrities have been seen donning the fashionable, yet sensible look and models even rock the socks at runway shows.
The New York Post had two of its fashion editors go toe-to-toe on the issue.
The New York Post had two of its fashion editors go toe-to-toe on the issue.
Thursday, June 17, 2010
Graveyards Are Where Dead People Live
Coca-Cola is introducing a new high-tech soda fountain that will let users mix up 104 different drinks, creating inventions such as Caffeine-Free Diet Raspberry Coke.
Coke's new Freestyle machine is housed in a curved metal shell created by the designers of Ferrari race cars, and features a touch-screen menu. Inside, technology common in measuring tiny doses of chemotherapy drugs is used to release digitally-controlled amounts of concentrate flavor from dozens of plastic cartridges.
Here's how it works: A regular soda fountain combines carbonated water and flavored syrup in a mixing chamber, and pours the mixed drink out through a designated spigot. But the Freestyle has just one nozzle. The machine pours carbonated water through the center of the nozzle, then shoots streams of flavor into the falling water, such as lime oil and Diet Coke syrup, so that the drink is mixed in the air.
Coke has filed for 34 patents on the Freestyle (that's for you Conch), but says the most important was for its so-called Perfect Pour technology, the spout that keeps one customer's Sprite with Grape from tasting like the last person's Pibb Xtra.
But the Freestyle's complicated technology and expense — Coke charges 30% more for it than traditional fountains — have slowed its way into stores. Five years after the company began developing the Freestyle, it's still only in tests in a handful of stores.
Coke's new Freestyle machine is housed in a curved metal shell created by the designers of Ferrari race cars, and features a touch-screen menu. Inside, technology common in measuring tiny doses of chemotherapy drugs is used to release digitally-controlled amounts of concentrate flavor from dozens of plastic cartridges.
Here's how it works: A regular soda fountain combines carbonated water and flavored syrup in a mixing chamber, and pours the mixed drink out through a designated spigot. But the Freestyle has just one nozzle. The machine pours carbonated water through the center of the nozzle, then shoots streams of flavor into the falling water, such as lime oil and Diet Coke syrup, so that the drink is mixed in the air.
Coke has filed for 34 patents on the Freestyle (that's for you Conch), but says the most important was for its so-called Perfect Pour technology, the spout that keeps one customer's Sprite with Grape from tasting like the last person's Pibb Xtra.
But the Freestyle's complicated technology and expense — Coke charges 30% more for it than traditional fountains — have slowed its way into stores. Five years after the company began developing the Freestyle, it's still only in tests in a handful of stores.
Wednesday, June 16, 2010
Song of the Week
"California Gurls" - Katy Perry featuring Snoop Dogg
So many reasons to hate this song
1) It's by Katy Perry
2) It's another attempt by her to get her songs in ads by the local tourism board. She got Vegas, now California, next a horrible song about the "concrete jungle where dreams are made of." Oh wait, that horrible song is already out there.
3) Girls is spelled with an U instead of an I, further contributing to popular music's deleterious effect on grammar in our society.
4) For those of you who thought MTV doesn't show music videos anymore, on my on-screen program guide 8:00 to 8:04 last night was carved out to show this video. They show one video and it's this one? (Note: it was the premiere because I don't see the video on youtube yet.)
5) Snoop's horrible verse which includes a line stolen from Vince's Slap Chop commercial (2:30 in)
6) A crude reference to the premature evacuation. "Sun-kissed skin so hot, will melt your popsicle"
So many reasons to hate this song
1) It's by Katy Perry
2) It's another attempt by her to get her songs in ads by the local tourism board. She got Vegas, now California, next a horrible song about the "concrete jungle where dreams are made of." Oh wait, that horrible song is already out there.
3) Girls is spelled with an U instead of an I, further contributing to popular music's deleterious effect on grammar in our society.
4) For those of you who thought MTV doesn't show music videos anymore, on my on-screen program guide 8:00 to 8:04 last night was carved out to show this video. They show one video and it's this one? (Note: it was the premiere because I don't see the video on youtube yet.)
5) Snoop's horrible verse which includes a line stolen from Vince's Slap Chop commercial (2:30 in)
6) A crude reference to the premature evacuation. "Sun-kissed skin so hot, will melt your popsicle"
What Do You Give Me For? Rick Levanthal and Carl Spackler
What do you give me for Fox News Correspondent Rich Levanthal (reporting from Afghanistan) and Carl Spackler (Bill Murray in "Caddyshack")?
Tuesday, June 15, 2010
No More BackYarns for Chase
Toddlers who watch too much TV may struggle in school later, with measurably lower scores in math, and they may get bullied more than other children.
And those children who watch more TV at age 2 weigh more by the time they were 10 and they eat more snacks and soft drinks.
Children who spend more time watching TV and less time playing with other kids may lose valuable chances to learn social skills.
The researchers started with more than 2,000 children taking part in a larger study. Their parents reported how much TV the children watched at 2-1/2 and later at 4-1/2 year old.
They checked with the children's teachers and doctors when the subjects were 10.
Every additional weekly hour of television at 29 months corresponded to a 7 percent drop in classroom attention and a 6 percent drop in math skills, the researchers found.
An hour more TV a week as a toddler meant a child was 10 percent more likely to be bullied, exercised 13 percent less, weighed 5 percent more and ate 10 percent more snacks, they found.
As always with these studies I think they discover a false cause-and-effect. It's not the television watching that leads to these things. Whatever is leading to the high rate of television watching is also leading to the weight gain, the bullying, etc. It's parents who aren't as invovled as they should be.
And I know how tempting it is to just plop the kid in front of the TV all day. Chase will not sit still for 10 seconds, but somehow he can watch Cars for 2 hours without moving. At least with The Backyardigans he gets up and runs around the room during "Racing Day."
And those children who watch more TV at age 2 weigh more by the time they were 10 and they eat more snacks and soft drinks.
Children who spend more time watching TV and less time playing with other kids may lose valuable chances to learn social skills.
The researchers started with more than 2,000 children taking part in a larger study. Their parents reported how much TV the children watched at 2-1/2 and later at 4-1/2 year old.
They checked with the children's teachers and doctors when the subjects were 10.
Every additional weekly hour of television at 29 months corresponded to a 7 percent drop in classroom attention and a 6 percent drop in math skills, the researchers found.
An hour more TV a week as a toddler meant a child was 10 percent more likely to be bullied, exercised 13 percent less, weighed 5 percent more and ate 10 percent more snacks, they found.
As always with these studies I think they discover a false cause-and-effect. It's not the television watching that leads to these things. Whatever is leading to the high rate of television watching is also leading to the weight gain, the bullying, etc. It's parents who aren't as invovled as they should be.
And I know how tempting it is to just plop the kid in front of the TV all day. Chase will not sit still for 10 seconds, but somehow he can watch Cars for 2 hours without moving. At least with The Backyardigans he gets up and runs around the room during "Racing Day."
Monday, June 14, 2010
What Really Happened
Here’s what really happened the night Ben Roethlisberger had his bathroom encounter with a 20-year-old college girl. Thanks to evidence released by the prosecutor we now have a better understanding. But first you have to understand the mindset of the two individuals involved.
First is a professional athlete who is rich, successful and obviously feels like he can have any woman at any time.
Then you have a 20-year-old college student, perhaps a little insecure about her weight (140 lbs) and totally starstruck by the big NFL star visiting her tiny little college town. She might also have been a little slutty, based on the nametag she was wearing when she first met Roethlisberger.
It said “DTF,” which stands for “Down to Fuck.” Roethlisberger told her “I’m into fucking girls” when he saw her name tag.
There was obviously a mutual interest because the two groups ended up at three different bars together, I think she followed him to the second one and thinking he was going to get some, he followed her friends to the third.
At the last bar, The Capital, Roethiseberger got a back VIP room and invited the girls. He bought them a bunch of shots and said “All my bitches, take some shots.”
After she was sufficiently drunk Roethlisberger’s bodyguard escorted her by the arm to a hallway and told her to sit on a stool and wait there.
When Roethlisberger approached her (with his penis already out of his pants) she bolted for the first door she saw. Unfortunately this was the bathroom. Roethisberger might have taken this as a sign she was inviting him in, and he followed her.
Here’s where the accuser’s story gets a little fuzzy, and the reason prosecutors didn’t press charges. Her story is pretty detailed up until this point when she abruptly says “and then he had sex with me.” She says he penetrated her (no condom) but she can’t recall what position they were in. Was she bent over, or forced up against the wall? And the cop didn’t ask what happened to her underwear, though I’m sure she didn’t know.
She says she told him the entire time “this isn’t ok, we can’t do this” but she never fought him off, never screamed and was so drunk and flustered she couldn’t even recount enough of the assault to convince the police to press charges.
But to me it’s clear Roethlisberger raped her, but she did so many things to put herself in a dangerous position, which allowed her rapist to get away with it.
First is a professional athlete who is rich, successful and obviously feels like he can have any woman at any time.
Then you have a 20-year-old college student, perhaps a little insecure about her weight (140 lbs) and totally starstruck by the big NFL star visiting her tiny little college town. She might also have been a little slutty, based on the nametag she was wearing when she first met Roethlisberger.
It said “DTF,” which stands for “Down to Fuck.” Roethlisberger told her “I’m into fucking girls” when he saw her name tag.
There was obviously a mutual interest because the two groups ended up at three different bars together, I think she followed him to the second one and thinking he was going to get some, he followed her friends to the third.
At the last bar, The Capital, Roethiseberger got a back VIP room and invited the girls. He bought them a bunch of shots and said “All my bitches, take some shots.”
After she was sufficiently drunk Roethlisberger’s bodyguard escorted her by the arm to a hallway and told her to sit on a stool and wait there.
When Roethlisberger approached her (with his penis already out of his pants) she bolted for the first door she saw. Unfortunately this was the bathroom. Roethisberger might have taken this as a sign she was inviting him in, and he followed her.
Here’s where the accuser’s story gets a little fuzzy, and the reason prosecutors didn’t press charges. Her story is pretty detailed up until this point when she abruptly says “and then he had sex with me.” She says he penetrated her (no condom) but she can’t recall what position they were in. Was she bent over, or forced up against the wall? And the cop didn’t ask what happened to her underwear, though I’m sure she didn’t know.
She says she told him the entire time “this isn’t ok, we can’t do this” but she never fought him off, never screamed and was so drunk and flustered she couldn’t even recount enough of the assault to convince the police to press charges.
But to me it’s clear Roethlisberger raped her, but she did so many things to put herself in a dangerous position, which allowed her rapist to get away with it.
Better Goring?
Which gore photo is better (more stomach-turning)?
Bullfighter Julio Aparicio getting gored in the mouth
Or some guy running with the bulls and getting gored in the leg?
Bullfighter Julio Aparicio getting gored in the mouth
Or some guy running with the bulls and getting gored in the leg?
Sunday, June 13, 2010
Friday, June 11, 2010
Word You Need To Know For the World Cup
This is a vuvuzela (voo-voo-zell-uh).
It's a plastic horn common in South Africa. If you want to know what one sounds like turn on any World Cup game at any time. The fans are blowing them constantly. It sounds like swarm of angry bees is coming out of your TV and into your ear.
It's a plastic horn common in South Africa. If you want to know what one sounds like turn on any World Cup game at any time. The fans are blowing them constantly. It sounds like swarm of angry bees is coming out of your TV and into your ear.
Another Angry Mets Fan
Frustrated with the lack of run support for Johan Santana Lady Gaga -- who took in the game while swilling beer and wearing a bikini -- gives the Mets offense the finger during the first game of the doubleheader against the San Diego Padres.
Thursday, June 10, 2010
Deja Vu All Over Again
In honor of Mrs. Poop's birthday, I present to you Mona, a beagle mix who earlier this year was the Adoptable Pet of the Game at a minor league Northwest Arkansas Naturals game.
That reminds me of another famous poop on the field incident.
At least those dogs were housebroken. They saw an open patch of grass and did their business. This dog on Regis and Kelly with special guest Beth Ostrosky Stern sees simulated grass and watch what happens:
That reminds me of another famous poop on the field incident.
At least those dogs were housebroken. They saw an open patch of grass and did their business. This dog on Regis and Kelly with special guest Beth Ostrosky Stern sees simulated grass and watch what happens:
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