I'm A Douche

My company is celebrating an anniversary this week so they gave everyone small bottles of champagne to celebrate. Someone came to talk to me and asked why mine was still on my desk. I said I don't really drink champagne, so she said she would take it if I didn't want it.
I said "no, [Mrs. Poop] wants to do this stupid thing. When we buy our house she wants to go there and sit on the floor and drink champagne in a totally empty house. I know it's stupid, but that's what she wants to do."
My colleague replied "that's what my husband and I did when we bought our house."

Oops.

But I'm not as big a douche as this student at Davenport University who tried to do a backflip on stage after getting his diploma.