When It's Not OK to Use Initials

Calling people by their initials is a game as old as time (remember BC for Brian Cohen and BD for Brian Damiano?)
But this trend is going a bit overboard.
T.O. is good for Terrell Owens. LT is good for LaDanian Tomlinson and LJ is good for Larry Johnson (though a different LT and a different LJ came first).
And my favorite is AK, for Alex Kaplan and Andrei Kirilenko. That works on so many levels because he's number 47 and he's a Russian assault weapon, like the AK-47.
But VY for Vince Young? I don't like it.
Here are some others I don't like.
I really don't think San Francisco fans should call their rookie tight end VD (Vernon Davis).
And Bo Outlaw is goofy enough without being called BO.
I doubt Tony Parker likes to be called TP, especially when followed by "for my bunghole."
And I imgaine that Kevin Youkilis prefers "Greek God of Walks" (even though he's not Greek) to KY, but maybe "Jelly" would be allowed.

Sportsman of the Year

I try not to get too worked up over SI Sportsman of the Year, because like the Grammys, Oscars and Emmys (which I ignore) the awards are not selected on an objective basis. SI chooses the Sportsman of the Year woh they think is deserving, but they also want the guy who will sell the most magazines.
Therefore Roger Federer is out. No one cares about tennis or him in the U.S. even though performance-wise, he 2006 was better than anyone's.
Except for maybe Tiger, but he already won twice.
It can't go to Floyd Landis for obvious reasons.
It can't go to Tony LaRussa because even though some are lauding him for his sportsmanship is not going after Kenny Rogers for cheating because Jim Leyland is his friend. He also buried his head in the sand on the steroids stuff.
Vince Young would have been an intriguing choice but his story is already almost 365 days old (though he is writing new chapters every Sunday).
George Mason as a team was a good story, but limited impact, also old and been told and probably has limited appeal at this point.
Barbaro is a horse.
That leaves Jason McElwain. I think he deserved it but his story is also almost a year old and it's already been told a million times. And they probably would catch some heat for choosing an amateur athlete like that.
So that only leaves Dwyane Wade, by default. Your SI Sportsman of the year.

A Good Jew

Senator Arlen Specter is going after the NFL and DirecTV over their exclusivity deal that prevents any competitor from carrying the NFL Sunday ticket. Clearly this practice is anti-competitive and should be prevented. The one thing I can't understand is why the NFL thinks the money they are getting from DirecTV would be more than they would get from giving the Ticket broader distribution.

Great Game

The Nets-Suns game was one of the most fun in NBA history. I actually listened to the end of regulation and the first OT while going to bed. The Suns eventually won 161-157 in double overtime.

Some highlights:
Tied for fourth highest point total in NBA history.
Steve Nash had a career high 42 points including a huge 3 to tie the game with 2 seconds left in regulation.
Jason Kidd had a triple double, 38 points, 14 and 14.
There were 224 shots, 27 three-pointers, 57 fouls and only 29 turnovers.
13 players scored double figures, 7 had more than 20.

Fighting the Russians

Diesel and I got into a brief tussle with two Russians in the park. We were headed home after our third loop (two of which we ran) around the park, so he was in no mood to bother anyone. Still this lady pressed herself up against the fence in terror. Diesel and I walked by casually. When he turned to look at her (didn't jump or even pull) she gave me a dirty look, wagged a finger at me and said "that's not fair." Then I stopped and her stupid husband made some remarks and I said "what do you want me to do?" He said "hold the dog." I said "I was holding him." And I did have a good grip on him. Then he said "But I don't know that." As we're having this conversation Diesel is sniffing and leaning and pulling at them. And I can tell they'd rather I just go. But I refused and stood there arguing with them. Once they gave up fighting back I just walked away.

Two more additions to this story:
1) Diesel didn't do anything wrong at all. These people were paranoid, and I refused to give in to them but hustling past them.
2) In dog years they were a combined age of at least 1000.

A Bit Too Far

Britney Spears admits she may have gone too far with the partying on the night she ended up showing her naked vagina to the paparazzi.

In a post on her website she says, "It's been so long since I've been out on the town with friends. It's also been 2 years since I've even celebrated my birthday. Every move I make at this point has been magnified more than I expected, and I probably did take my newfound freedom a little too far. Anyway, thank God for Victoria's Secrets' new underwear line!"

Abstinence

Ohio State Coach Jim Tressel abstained from voting in the coach's poll that would help determine his team's opponent in the national title game. Many are criticizing him for being chickenshit, but he said he had a conflict of interest. He clearly did have a conflict of interest (his interest to win the national title against his interest to vote for the best team). And I don't have a problem with his abstention. Whomever he votes for, it's assumed he only voted for them because he didn't want to play the other team. But a lot of critics are saying he didn't vote because he knows Michigan is the better team but he wanted to play Florida without looking like a coward or a traitor to his conference.

A Show TON Must Watch

Saturday at 9 on ESPN, Ali Rap. It's going to be a rap (somehow) tribute to Ali and all his great quotes.

Two of TON's favorites:
I'm a baaaaaaaaaaaaad man.

(while holding child) Did you know your daddy could whup everybody?

NFL is Poop - Week 13

Playoff Picture - AFC
New England, Baltimore, Indianapolis and San Diego will win their divisions. Cincinnati, Jacksonville, New York Jets, Denver and Kansas City all have 7-5 records and two will end up making the playoffs. The Jets will definitely make it because they have the easiest schedule. Jacksonville won't because they have the hardest. The winner of week 16's Cincinnati-Denver game will be the other.

Playoff Picture - NFC
Dallas, Chicago, New Orleans and Seattle will win their divisions. Philadelphia, New York, Atlanta and Carolina all have 6-6 records and two will end up making the playoffs. The Giants and Carolina will be those two because they have the best players. The teams play each other a lot these few weeks, which Philly having games against all three (including Monday's win over Carolina) in the last month.

Urlacher or Briggs?
I used to think Brian Urlacher was the most overrated player in the NFL. I thought that because Lance Briggs is so awesome that Urlacher is able to roam the field and make plays. But I read an article in Sports Illustrated that basically said Urlacher is so good, he changes the way offenses play, and makes all 10 other players much better than they are. Namely, he's one middle linebacker who can keep up with any receiver, back or tight end in the middle of the field, the one weak area of the Cover 2 defense the Bears employ. Because of him, offenses have to look for other ways to attack the Bears, meaning the run into Briggs. Also, opposing QBs have to hold the ball longer because of the good coverage, leading to more sacks by the front line. Then I watched the Bears a couple weeks and saw Briggs make some sick plays. Now I realize both their linebackers are awesome. If you are like me you like Briggs because he is tough. If you are like Bill, you like Urlacher because he is cute and you are gay.

Game of the Week
Dallas Cowboys 23 New York Giants 20
For the second straight week the Giants self-destructed. This time I do blame Kiwanuka. I thought his mistake against the tirans was a result of bad calls by officials affecting him, but this time he fumbled the ball away when the Giants could have taken a comfortable lead. The Giants were also hurt by stupid play-calling, especially in the red zone and undisciplined cheap shots that resulted in 15 yard penalties.

Game to Watch
Baltimore at Kansas City
Both teams are coming off tough losses. The Ravens hold on the division is slipping if they lose this game, while the Chiefs need a win to keep up with the other 7-5 AFC teams. Also an interesting contrast in styles, Baltimore's tough D against Kansas City's running game.

A Brief Rant About the Redskins
The Redskins took a 14-0 lead, then gave up 24 straight points to a team that has a quarterback who can't throw. Jason Campbell hasn't played poorly but he hasn't set the world on fire like some other first year quarterbacks (Young, Rivers & Romo).

Cheerleader of the Week
JoAnna of the SeaGals. I really like the squad name but their website is horrible. No info on the individual girls. Shameful! But I chose her anyway because the Seahawks beat the Pizza Parlor Dereks this week and masturbating over one of their Gals will be his best chance at revenge.




If The Super Bowl Were Played Today
Dallas 31 San Diego 28
San Diego was winning the whole time until Martyball took over and Dallas scored 2 late TDs to win. But finally some change in this category. The Colts are still good but can't or won't put it all together. This might be the first year they don't peak in the regular season. An impressive win over the Giants gives the Cowboys this spot despite being 2 games behind in the standings. Rex Grossman is killing the Bears.

Make Money Off Kids' Broken Necks

The company that makes those ridiculous shoes with wheels in the heels (Heely's) is going pulic tomorrow. This could be the next Crox or Under Armor.

The World's Most Perfect Food

Mrs. Poop went to her holiday party and sent me this text message "scallops wrapped in bacon."
I was so jealous, but she refused to put some in her purse for me.

What's Forever For?

The true love of Vince Vaughn and Jennifer Aniston could not withstand the hot glare of the nation's eyes. They broke up. No more motorboating for Vince. At least not with her. But if you motorboat with Aniston you could lose an eye.

And even young high profile couples don't survive. While Seth and Summer are going through trying times, things have gotten too tough for Adam Brody and Rachel Bilson.



If these loves can't last forever then tell me, what's forever for?

Don't Give Up, Don't Ever Give Up

The Syracuse-Oklahoma State game was played for a good cause, the V Foundation for Cancer Research.
The Foundation started the night Jim Valvano gave his famous speech at the ESPYs. The speech is not available on YouTube, but you can watch a small clip of it on the above site. You can get a copy of it on DVD with a donation of $30. I just did that because I felt bad that I never did anything productive with the money I receive from the charitable soda machine.

Mike and I are the only two people in the world who make fun of this speech. We always joke about Rocco and Angelina Valvano. "I can't help it. That's being the son of Rocco and Angelina Valvano. It comes with the territory. We hug, we kiss, we love."

Song of the Week

Confessions Part III by Weird Al Yankovic.
The second hit off his newest album "Straight Outta Linwood," it follows on the success of "White and Nerdy."
No video for this yet, so just click the link hit play, then listen while you read the rest of the blog.



"Once I blew my nose and then I wiped it on your cat,
I lied yes that dress makes you look fat,
anyway, I shouldn't say anymore until I give you part four of my confessions."

Do These Chips Have Nacho Cheese in Them?

The best part of Syracuse's loss to Oklahoma State came at the very end. A Cowboy dove into the stands for a loose ball and came up with an armful of nacho cheese. They showed the little kid whose chips were violated on ESPN and he was teary-eyed (and wearing an SU hat). They showed him again a few seconds later and his spirits had lifted as he was drinkinga 55-gallon drum of Coke with his dad. Say hello to child obesity.

Syracuse Proves Me Wrong

I really thought the Orange would bounce back from the Wichita State loss with a better performance against Oklahoma State.
SU played pretty well and kept it close for most of the game until a long scoring drought in the second half.
SU went 6:53 without scoring a point, over the course of that time, OSU was credited with 6 steals, most of them on horrible passes by Paul Harris or Josh Wright. And they only took 3 shots. Nearly 7 minutes, and only 3 shot attempts, because they couldn't hold on to the ball long enough to get a shot up.
That said, I was really impressed with the improvements made by Terrence Roberts and Darryl "Mookie" Watkins. Watkins still fouled everybody, and SU still got killed on the boards, but I blame the zone, more than I blame them.
As for Demetris Nichols, he played a great game, but I felt he forced a couple 3 point shots after he made one to cut the lead to 58-52.
Devendorf was sick, and Wright and Harris were terrible. Gorman and Rautins are useless and should never play. Who's Mike Jones?
Btw, Louie McCroskey transferred to Marist. I thought he would lose a year of eligibility and since he'd already played 3 years he'd have none left, but I guess I was wrong.

Anyway, I am disappointed the team lost but I don't think the season is lost. I think SU will be on the fringes of the Top 25 the whole season and depending on late season play could get a middle of the road seed for the tournament.

Tonight's Prediction

I'm not going to make a habit of this but I am going to offer a prediction for tonight's Syracuse - Oklahoma State game. A lot of you say I just predict the Orange to lose every game, then brag when I'm right. Well, actually I predicted all 8 games so far this season correctly. I predicted SU to beat Holy Cross, Knishes and the rest of the patsies. But I expect them to win again tonight. But I fear that Oklahoma State will have a bad season finish 5-11 in the Big XII and not count as a valuable non-conference win for the Orange later in the season.
Is it just me or does it seem like this SU-OSU matchup happens quite often. I remember losing to them in an 8-9 game in the tournament in my junior year (1999), when they had Desmond Mason.
And of course in 2003 we beat them in the second round in the Jeremy McNeil game, when he had 4 blocks (seemingly in a row) to bring SU back from a 25-8 deficit.
The two teams met two years ago in the same Jimmy V Classic and OSU won.
Evidently the two teams played one other time, but I don't remember it.

Taco Hell

Twenty-five cases of E. coli have now been confirmed by the Middlesex County Health Department in New Jersey, and health officials say more are under investigation.
Twenty of the victims fell ill after eating at Taco Bell restaurants in South Plainfield, Edison and Easton.
Officials linked the E. coli outbreak to the Taco Bell franchises after conducting food history studies on 22 of the victims, 20 of whom were confirmed to have eaten at one of those three locations.
On Long Island, eight Taco Bell franchises shut down voluntarily Monday after health officials determined that two of the 14 people sickened there had also recently eaten at Taco Bell.

Why Do We Play?

Staten Island Screwed

International Speedway Corp. scrapped plans Monday to build a track on Staten Island, stalling NASCAR's dream to bring a race to the New York area.
"While we are disappointed that we could not complete the speedway development on Staten Island, our enthusiasm for the metropolitan New York market is in no way dampened," ISC president Lesa France Kennedy said. "We continue to view the region as a prime location for a major motorsports facility."
They badly want to expand NASCAR into the New York metropolitan area, and moved toward that goal in 2004 when a subsidiary of ISC paid about $100 million for a 440-acre former oil tank farm on Staten Island. The company later bought another 236 acres to gain the necessary land for a race track.
The goal was to build a .8-mile state-of-the-art track that would have accommodated 80,000 fans and had the New York City skyline as its backdrop.
But the proposal has been met by severe resistance, including a a hotly contested April public meeting in which tempers reached dangerous levels -- forcing police to end the meeting over safety concerns.
Residents complained of traffic tie-ups and argued that the two major roads leading into the property would likely need major renovations to handle the increased loads.
Environmental concerns were also cited by opponents of the plan.
ISC cited an "inability to secure the critical local political support that is necessary to secure the required land-use change approvals" in ending the Staten Island project. In all, the company said spent about $150 million on the project.
ISC said it may now sell the land, which it believes will be worth more than $100 million and described as the largest undeveloped acreage in the five boroughs of New York City.

I'm very disappointed. I was looking forward to going to my first NASCAR race. And because I believe that New York should be the center for everything good, I regret that this huge sport will still have no presence here. Maybe I'll visit Pizza Parlor Derek and hit the race in Loudon.

Looking for Balance

After years of struggling with blisters, sore red toes and even bleeding toes, I've left my Adidas, Nike and Asics running shoes in the past and decided to go with my first pair of New Balance.
These shoes served me well in their maiden voyage and I hope they will provide me many years of blister free comfort through hundreds of runs in the park with my new shoes and my best friend (not Vabilla, not The Concierge, Diesel!)
I decided that New Balance would be the best for me when I heard the "Fat Man Walking" say New Balance were the most comfortable of all the sneakers he tried.
But I think some of you Poopheads have testified to the comfort of New Balance as well.

Decorations for Our New Sun Porch

Mrs. Poop and I haven't quite figured out how we are going to decorate our newly remodeled sun porch (some of you know this as the beer pong room). Thanks to the fine folks at Fathead, we have our answer. Fathead is featuring 3 Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders, including last week's Cheerleader of the week, Becca. For only $149 we will have a 5 foot 2 inch Becca watching us play beer pong next year.

Focks is Furious

Needless to say, Michigan alum Focks, is furious today. He feels his Wolverines deserved another crack at Ohio State in the BCS National Championship game, instead of Florida.
I told him during the SEC Championship that he needed Arkansas to win because if Florida won, they would leapfrog UMich in the BCS standings. He said "I will go back to the hospital if that happens. Put that in the blog."
Well it happened, and here's how:
1) Florida did play a tougher schedule. LSU, Tennessee and Arkansas were all better than anyone UMich beat except for Notre Dame.
2) The SEC has been screwed before, undeservedly. The conference usually has 3 or 4 top teams that knock each other down.
3) The BCS computers had nothing to do with it. The computer rankings for Florida and Michigan were an exact tie.
4) Florida won the coaches' poll. One jerk in the Harris Poll gave Florida a #1 vote over Ohio State. But apparently several voters had Florida #5.
5) Ohio State already beat Michigan. Under my theory of one and done, Florida was more deserving seeing as how they hadn't already lost to OSU.

BUT, I think Michigan is the better team. The one thing we never consider when deciding these things, is which team has the better players. We look at wins, losses, momentum, history, coaches and strength of schedule. But we never say "this team has better players than that team." But that is a subjective measure so we have to rely on which team is more deserving based on resume during the season. And that team is Florida.

I'll leave you with this quote from Focks "Bullshit. Michigan is better than Florida. Vegas had michigan 6 point favorites over Florida if they played. I'm done with college football. It's too shady for me."