Now She's Gone Too Far

If Miley Cyrus wants to ride a wrecking ball naked, that's her business. If she wants to scratch her itchy diseased vagina with a foam finger while Alan Thicke's creepy son watches, I understand, it's all in the name of publicity. And if she wants to light up a joint on stage just because she's in Amsterdamn, that is her legal right.
But when she dresses up like a two-bit hooker with the faces of 2Pac and Biggie on her flat disgusting ass, that's when I have to say something.
Real musicians, who achieved success and fame through their talents, not through a ridiculous circus freak show of publicity stunts; real artists who created meaningful music with a story to tell and a lesson to learn, shouldn't have their images desecrated in this way.
I'd say Biggie and 2Pac and rolling over in their graves but I know they are chilling on an island somewhere with no idea who the fuck this dirty little skank even is.

When Can We Expect a Kendall Jenner Sex Tape?

The shameless Kardashian-Jenner family is at it again, showing no compunction about sexualizing their daughters if that's what it takes to keep their entertainment empire rolling.
Next up on the slut list is Kendall Jenner, 17 years old and 3 to 4 years away from making her own sex tape. Look at how she is dressed in the Kardashians' 2012 Christmas Card. She's in a sleeveless dress, exposing a lot of leg.
Everyone else is fairly well covered up, including Kim, the harlot who started it all. As everything in pop culture does, the Kardashians will eventually fade, and that's when they'll pull out the old sex tape card.

Note: In a little box by Kim's feet is Mercy, a cat given to her by Kanye. She had the cat for a couple months, pawned it off on an assistant then euthanized it. She says the cat had cancer, I'm not so sure.

She Swallowed Her G-String

Kanye West once rapped about a girl who has "got an ass that'll swallow up a G-string." He may have found his dream girl. Kanye and Kim Kardashian went out to dinner and she wore a bra, and a see-through skirt.

And her giant ass stretched the skirt out so that you could see she wasn't wearing underwear, except for the unlikely possibility of a g-string completely swallowed by her mammoth ass cheeks.

Scarlett Johansson Naked Cell Phone Pics

The pictures the internet has been awaiting for years have finally surfaced. Topless Scarlett Johansson cell phone pics.



Since Gnitsark tipped me off to the story (and even slid his non-work iPhone under my nose so I wouldn't have to wait until I got home to check out these pictures) I used his face to obscure the nipple and keep the Poop's high standards of decency.

As always with cell phone pics, the question comes up, are they real? This certainly looks like her face. And I have read reports that the pictures have been examined at a very high magnification and no evidence of photoshopping is present.

So if the pictures are real, how about the titties? ScarJo has long been the subject of the "real or fake?" debate and I have to say her cans stand up to close scrutiny. They are a natural shape, and you can't see the implant as you often can with fake boobies. Don't believe me? Look for yourself, BUT NOT AT WORK.

She Needs to Write a Book on Time Management

Elizabeth Berkley is writing a self-help book for teen girls.

After a career filled with roles in which she was forced to go topless and portray a stripper or a hooker she wants to offer self-esteem advice.

The actress will be writing "Ask Elizabeth," a "a self-esteem handbook for teen girls" based on questions she has been asked over the years.

Does This Look Like a Lesbian to You?

One thing I've never understood about the gay and lesbian community is the dichotomy of their tastes. Gay men, who wish to have sex with other men, tend to pick the most effeminate men they can find. Whereas lesbians seem to typically be mannish women.
So it's no surprise that I find Lindsay Lohan's coming out to be a little incongruous with the rest of the lesbian community.
I think we all know that Lohan is a little fucked up in the head so maybe that could explain her turning to lesbianism for the happiness she can't seem to find elsewhere.
She also has an unsatisfying relationship with her father, which can be a major predictor as to which women will turn towards promiscuity or in this case lesbianism.



In this picture of Lindsay Lohan and her girlfriend Samantha Ronson you can see that Ronson looks like a lesbian, and Lohan is all made up with her tits hanging out.
This seems like a look men would like, but women, not so much.
I think Lohan has sucked so much dick in her life that she just got tired of it and decided she'd like something else for a change. I think this carpet-munching phase is just a ruse perpetrated by her management team to make her more attractive to men. In 6 months she'll be back in a major movie role, dump Ronson and do a People magazine cover with the headline "I Like Cock Again!"
Mark my words.

Just What the World Needs

If there needed to be proof that slutty celebrities like Britney Spears are having a deleterious impact on our youth, especially young girls, here it is.



Britney's sister 16-year-old Jamie Lynn Spears is pregnant. The father is 19-year-old Casey Aldridge who supposedly met Jamie Lynn in church.
I'm not going to declare the end of Western Civilization because one teenage slut got knocked up, but I do find it a bit worrisome that the very thing conservative tightasses have been warning about for years has come true.
Young girls who idolize Britney Spears and Paris Hilton are very likely to grow up to be skanky hobags themselves.



I do admire Jamie Lynn's decision to keep the baby whereas a lot of other teens might have taken the "easy" way out.
I also hope that she can be a better mother than her sister has thus far proven to be. Perhaps a good first step is that she plans to raise her child in Louisiana instead of in the media glare that Britney is subjecting her sons to.
Now before you accuse me of being prudish let me say that I would never tell a woman what to do with her vagina, but I would recommend that she wait until she's at least smart enough to use birth control.

If I Were Him I'd Get a Paternity Test

Christina Aguilera appears almost naked on the cover of Marie Claire's Sexy Mama issue to show off her baby bump.
Turns out a pregnant slut is still a slut.
You may remember that Britney Spears pulled this move before, and if there's one person whose parenting you don't want to emulate, it's Britney Spears.

America's Sweettits, I Mean Sweetheart

The star of High School Musical, Vanessa Hudgens is not quite living up to her Disney Channel image. The tawdry teenager who is dating her love interest (Zac Efron) from the movie took a nude photo of herself which of course surfaced on the internet. The picture - NSFW doesn't seem like a professional job, just like she was fooling around with someone who sold her out.
A couple of things I noticed, first, she favors a bush, which goes against what most of Hollywood's hot young sluts are doing -- which is going bare down there. Second she is not even 19 yet so unless this picture was taken very recently, this picture may technically qualify as child porn.

Blewinsky

Monica Lewinsky recently turned 31. Can you believe it? It seems like only yesterday she was crawling around the White House on her hands and knees, putting everything in her mouth. They grow up so fast, don't they?

What Do Paris and Juice Have in Common?

Paris Hilton suffers from extreme Attention Deficit Disorder which may have triggered the Sheriff's decision to spring her from Lynwood Jail last week.

Hilton is taking Adderall for her ADD.

Reports that she was not given her meds and that's responsible for her breakdowns in jail are false. Adderall helps people focus and communicate. It is not a mood stabilizer.

Back to the Hoosegow

A tearful Paris Hilton was dragged from the courtroom and taken back to jail after the judge who sentenced her didn't but the Sheriff's Department excused that she was "reassigned" to house arrest because of "medical reasons." I'm not sure who's dick she sucked, or how much she paid to get out, but the judge says he is the one who decides the sentences. I don't feel bad for Paris, she probably needs to learn this lesson but at this point I think she is getting treated too harshly, and that people are trying to make a name for themselves in this case. According to most sources people with her same offense seldom serve any jail time at all. She'll be headed back to prison to finish her sentence, I think she's still going to do only the 23 days the judge reduced her too. But apparently in prison she had been crying all the time, was in severe depression and was released due to mental health reasons after two extensive visits with a psychologist. I hope she can toughen up and serve her time with dignity and grace like Martha Stewart.

Lindsay Lohan and Vanessa Minillo Play With Knives

Paris Comes Home

Paris Hilton has been released from prison after serving only 3 days of her 23 day (shortened from 45) sentence.
She'll be under house arrest for the next 40 days.
She's been fitted with an ankle bracelet.
Sheriff's Department spokesman says Paris had a medical condition which could not be disclosed to protect her right to privacy.

Paris in Prison

Paris Hilton has checked into an LA County Jail where she will spend the next 22 days (1 down), contemplating ways to improve the world and change the perceptions of her, even though she worked so hard to create those perceptions. Paris was allowed to keep her hair extensions, many inmates are not. Hers fit the jail's description of "tightly wound." Helping create this booking photo. This is her actual booking photo from the LA Sheriff's Department.

What a Difference Ten Years Makes

Roughly ten years ago, a young pop sensation named Britney Spears broke onto the scene with her catchy hit "Hit Me Baby, One More Time." She appealed to men of all ages with her teen angst and naughty schoolgirl attire.




Then Britney went through a phase where she wasn't a girl, but not yet a woman, but she tried to be one, a really slutty one, and it was awesome. Then she became a woman. She became a sloppy mother of two (with the C-section scar to prove it) in torn fishnet stockings.





Then after Britney made it big, a fresh faced newcomer named Christina Aguilera burst onto the scene with her hit song "Genie in a Bottle" that made lots of guys rub themselves the right way.




Then she changed her image and became a dirty whore in assless chaps with jizz in her hair.



Editor's Note: Christina has cleaned up her image recently, after marrying a nice Jewish boy. But she's still a whore.

At the tail end of this pop princess phase, emerged Mandy Moore with the song "Candy." She was only 15 so she was a little young to get too sexually excited about, except for pedophiles, the Concierge and TON who famously said "I was at my computer and I accidentally typed in www.mandymoore.com."



Fast forward several years and Mandy Moore has turned into by the far the hottest of three. Proving that as in life, when it comes to being a hot young pop star, it's not where you start, it's where you finish.

Britney Blogs

Britney Spears fresh out of rehab addresses an open letter to her fans:

"Dear Fans,
I just wanted to reach out to all of you and explain some of the things that I have been faced with recently.
It's so funny how many stories are put out there about people. It's like we all want our side of the story out there as well, but at the end of the day only a few people care to hear what is really going on since the bad is always so much more interesting than the truth. I don't know why, but this is so weird to me. I used to be angry at the tabloids for printing horrible things about me, but now I try to just be numb to what I see. I saw Tyra Banks once get really upset and cry on her show because they made her look fat. We all want a certain image of ourselves out there, and at some point we all do really care what other people think or we wouldn't be here.
Recently, I was sent to a very humbling place called rehab. I truly hit rock bottom. Till this day I don't think that it was alcohol or depression. I was like a bad kid running around with ADD. I had a manager from a long time ago come in and try to direct me and my life after I got my divorce. I was so overwhelmed I think that I was in a little shock too. I didn't know who to go to. I realized how much energy and love I had put into my past relationship when it was gone because I genuinely did not know what to do with myself, and it made me so sad. I confess, I was so lost.
This letter is to not place blame on anyone, although I do see the world with a completely different set of eyes now. Being in that vulnerable state and taken to dinners and parties with friends and finding out later you paid for everything was a huge learning lesson for me. I think the whole problem was letting too many people into my life. You never know another persons intentions or what another person wants. I feel I was too open and looking for answers when I had it all to begin with. I have had to cut so many people out of my life. It is so sad, because if anyone is a family person...it is me. When I was little I remember every night watching movies with my family and feeling so at peace. Dancing and singing all the time just like a little girl should. Now recently I find with my children that I want them to have that feeling all of the time. I am having to face a lot of things right now since I have children of my own. A lot of insecurities from when I was little are coming up again. It is like we are never good enough.
I know everyone thinks that I am playing the victim, but I am not and I hate what is going on right now so much. Maybe this is the reason for this letter...to maybe allow people to look at me differently. It is like when you are a real woman and say what you feel and how you think things are supposed to be, that people just say you are a "bitch."
I feel like some of the people in my life made more of some issues than was necessary. I also feel like they knew I was beginning to use my brain for a change and cut some ties, so they wanted to be in more control of my life than me. I think it is actually normal for a young girl to go out after a huge divorce. I think it was a bigger issue because I had not gone out in such a long time. I am 25 and I do still have a lot to learn, and I am going to make mistakes everyday, and I am sure every mistake I make will probably be on CNN or Good Morning America. I am only human people and I love you for still loving me.
I am sitting here at home and it is 6:25 and both of my sons are asleep. I am truly blessed to have them in my life. Everyday is so surreal. Life in general is so surreal and crazy.
I just hope this letter made some of you think a little bit more of me and where I am coming from. I just want the same things in life that you want...and that is to be happy. It is just so weird because everyone has their own perception of me and how they think I really am. It is so weird how stories are told. There is your side, my side, and the truth. Somebody has to figure it out. I guess we will never really understand or figure out life completely. That's God's job. I can't wait to meet him...or her.
Love, Britney"

Hilton's New Suite

Paris Hilton is going to jail. She violated the terms of her probation for a drunk driving arrest by driving with a suspended license. She claims she didn't understand the terms of her probation and even fired her PR person because of it. She says the punishment is extreme and she is being singled out for being famous.

For years she got everything she wanted because she was famous for being famous. Now she's going to see the downside.

I do believe a normal person who committed the same offenses would have received a lighter punishment but I don't weep for Paris Hilton. I don't buy her ignorance excuse, I have no patience for drunk driving and if she didn't know better, in the words of Vincent Vega she "shoulda fuckin known better."

She's going to be in a prison for low level criminals but I still hope her cellmate is some big bitch who wants to reenact Paris' most well-known moment, every night for 45 nights.

Britney is Back! And She's Hot Again!

Britney Spears gave an unpublicized concert at the House of Blues in San Diego Tuesday night. Word got out that it would be her, in her first concert since 2004. Even though the concert was billed as "The M&Ms" (I love M&Ms, especially those that are nuts, like Britney), many fans decided to buy tickets from scalpers.
Including this lucky guy who got a lapdance from Britney and her four slutty friends.

Does this remind anyone else of Janet Jackson's incredible performance during her HBO special from Hawaii?

Antonella is a Liar

In a recent interview Antontella said she did not want to be known for her racy pictures, which were taken and expected to remain private.
She also said if Playboy offers she will not pose. Liar!