Lead By Example

The Sochi Olympics start in 3 weeks and so far all we know is that Russia doesn't want gay people acting gay on its streets. In response to that the U.S. (President Obama) named a delegation of gay athletes, chief among them Billie Jean King and figure skater Brian Boitano. King never played in the Olympics (she did coach) and Boitano wasn't even out until last week when he did so in order to accept this honor.
You see the selection of King, Boitano et al, was based on one factor, they're gay.
And that's what prompted Mario Pescante, an IOC member from Italy to say "it's absurd that a country like that sends four lesbians to Russia just to demonstrate that in their country gay rights have (been established)."
And if I had to choose sides in this debate, I would side with Pescante, but allow me to state his point a little more delicately. If the U.S. is trying to prove that gay people are equal on all counts, including and especially sporting prowess, and therefore we shouldn't judge people or select people for honors based on the sexuality.
Wouldn't it be an outrage to give such an honor only to heterosexuals? So why is it ok to give the honor to only homosexuals?
I know the counterarguments to what I am saying: we have to make an issue of this and bring attention to the harsh policies in Russia and elsewhere. Basically the pendulum is pulled to one side, that we have to pull it to the other side, past the center, if we ever want it to rest in the middle.
That seems completely logical, but I disagree. I don't see how violating the very thing you're fighting for (people and athletes should not be judged by the sexual preference) helps further your point.
In my experience, the best way to influence the behavior of others is to be the person you want them to be.
So the U.S. should have named Boitano, and the usual raft of dignitaries and brown nosers, and made its point all the same, with a little less hypocrisy.

A Few Comments About the Gay Marriage Ruling

1) Good, great, grand! I really don't see any reason why gay people shouldn't be allowed to get married.

2) I really don't see any reason why the government has any say in anyone's marriage. The government should get out of the marriage business but not recognizing anyone's unions and by not giving any kind of tax or benefit advantages to married people over single ones.

3) It's disgusting how President Obama is trying to act like he is on the winning side of this one. He ran for President twice, both times on anti-gay marriage platform. In 5 years he didn't make a single actual effort to get DOMA overturned. He did what he always does, took the easiest position at the outset and then took credit at the conclusion.

4) Hopefully this will be the day when all the closeted gay celebrities, athletes and whomever else comes out of the closet. If being gay is not a big deal, then stop making it a big deal. Stop making it a secret for years and only coming out when you get a magazine cover out of it. If you really want to help all the poor gay teenagers who are getting picked on and bullied in schools, just come out already. The more prominent gay people who show no embarrassment about being gay, the easier it will be for society to come to accept gay people.

I've Always Wondered About This

Even if you are not gay you might often wonder how male/male relationships work, sexually. How do they decide who gets to put it in whose ass and when? Do they each get a turn? Or does one guy get one night, and the other gets the next?

Thanks to your tax dollars we now have the answers. The National Institutes of Health subsidized a study on gay mens' penis size.

Here's what they found out:

Gay men who felt they had small or inadequate penis sizes were more likely to become “bottoms,” or anal receptive, while gay men with larger penises were more likely to identify themselves as “tops,” or anal insertive.

That seems a little counterintuitive to me. But what do I know about gay sex?

Chas Bono is an Ingrate

I know Chas Bono has his issues. He was born a woman, became a lesbian and recently went through gender reassignment surgery to become a man.
I don't have a problem with any of that. Here's what I contest: when asked recently to name 5 favorite songs, Bono refused. How could the only child of Sonny and Cher not say "I Got You Babe" is his favorite song.



The greatest love song of all-time and your parents sing it and you won't even admit to liking it. I know Sonny and Cher weren't always understanding about Chas's lifestyle, but come on, even if you hate the song, just be a good kid and say "I Got You Babe."

Btw, if anyone could ever possibly explain why Mrs. Poop loves me, this is it "when I'm sad, you're a clown, and if I get scared, you're always around."

He Was Much Funnier When He Was Doing Hot-Foots

Former Mets pitcher Roger McDowell was always known as the team prankster for his jokes, including his famous hot foot demonstration on the 86 Mets video, "A Year to Remember."

At a game in San Francisco last week McDowell shouted at 3 male fans (they may have been hecklers) "Are you guys a homo couple or a threesome?"

Then he made a circle with his thumb and index finger and shoved the bat through it. He also simulated sex with the bat and asked the three men if they were "giving it to each other up the ass."

That's when a conscientious man with two 9-year-old daughters yelled "hey there are kids out here."

Then he approached Quinn with the bat and asked "how much are your teeth worth?"

McDowell earned a two week suspension for that little joke. Which is better than being fired, and I'm actually surprised he didn't get axed for that.

I've Become What I Despise

Nearly three years after deriding the Diaper Dude, calling it gay and saying I would rather carry a pink flowery diaper bag than a Diaper Dude, I now carry one.




A very generous friend decided I needed one, and even though I pleaded with her (she gave me advance notice) she ignored my wishes and foisted upon me an insecure man's diaper bag.

I must admit the bag is pretty cool, has some modern conveniences, like a hold for your phone on the strap and carrying it as a backpack is much easier than the shoulder strap. So even though I would never buy one for myself, I guess it is a pretty cool gift. But I still think it makes me gay.

More Incontrovertible Photographic Evidence Proving Elena Kagan is a Lesbian

You see the way Elena Kagan is sitting? More proof she's a lesbian. As if we need more proof. Young, straight women sit with their legs crossed. Older straight women sit with their ankles crossed. You know who sits with their legs open? Lesbians, that's who!

Carpet Muncher, Clam Digger, Softball Player

The Wall Street Journal published a picture on its front page of Supreme Court Nominee Elena Kagan playing softball. The picture was taken in 1993, and became a front-page story in 2010. Some have claimed the Journal did this to raise questions about Kagan’s sexuality. She is rumored to be a lesbian but the White House angrily denies these “charges.” Kagan has said nothing.



And that’s the problem. All the liberals and gays out there long for the day when someone’s sexual preference doesn’t matter, especially for a Supreme Court Justice when lots of other issues are way more important when determining competency for the role. But instead of blaming the evil people who keep asking the questions, I think it’s the people who constantly evade the issue who make sexuality important.
Ricky Martin, Johnny Weir, Adam Lambert, Rosie O’Donnell and Ellen DeGeneres are just some of the celebrities who at least initially lied or hid their sexuality. Do they think that brings us closer to the day when no one will care? What if they simply said, “yes I am gay.” Wouldn’t that minimize it, if that is indeed their goal?
Which brings us back to the Wall Street Journal, of course their goal was to raise questions about her sexuality. Combine the rumors, with the stereotype of softball players and you can reach no other conclusion. But maybe the Journal was doing more for the cause than all the closeted celebrities and public figures. Don’t we have to have the conversation before we can end the conversation?
Not sure, but I’d like to ask Jennie Finch about it.

Quick Questions

An Ad You Won't See During the Super Bowl

A gay dating website, mancrunch.com, had its ad rejected by CBS.



CBS said its standards and practices department rejected the ad. Gay groups are claiming discrimination but CBS also says it has very few ad slots left and it couldn't verify Mancrunch's financial status.

While I disagree with this decision because it seems like it was made because the ad shows two guys kissing, I also doubt Mancrunch's motives. I know a lot of gay men will watch the Super Bowl, but for the relative dollars it seems like Mancrunch would be better off advertising on the Oscars. I think they knew this ad would get rejected which allowed them to claim discrimination and get their ad out there without paying a dime.

Adam Lambert Goes Down

In the most shocking upset in American Idol history (though Jordin over Blake was surprising) Kris Allen prevailed over Adam Lambert.

This morning people grasp at straws for answers and invariably come up with what I predicted months ago: America just isn't ready for a drag queen idol. A gay idol maybe, but not a drag queen.

There may be a certain element of revenge here. The gays getting their comeuppance for what they did to insanely hot Carrie Prejean, Miss California.

Actually, in truth I think Lambert lost because he absolutely sucked and people were tired of listening to his awful screeching.

Many times over the years I have wished Sam Cooke would rise from the dead, but none more so than when Lambert turned his most famous song (A Change is Gonna Come) into a gay anthem full of high pitched squeals, so he could reach in Lambert's throat and rip his vocal cords out.

I predict no long-term success for either Lambert or Kris Allen and I think the biggest star from this season might be Katrina Darrell thanks to her brand new fake titties.

Why Miss California Should Have Won

She's the only one in the pageant who knows how to wear a sash.

Picture is small, but best I could find, she's third from the left first row.



I'm not going to go on a rant about this pageant this because Mrs. Poop will yell at me but there's no way a gay guy should be judging a pageant in which tits are a major factor. And no way any judge should decide who wins based on her political views. We're sorry, nobody wants gay marriage legalized, but don't penalize the hot bitch with the nice tits.

Even Mrs. Poop Would Have Done This

Two nurses at Mercy Walworth Medical Center in Lake Geneva, Wisconsin have been fired for taking a picture of a patient's X-ray and posting it on Facebook.
The patient was admitted to the emergency room with something lodged in his rectum. The nurses took pictures of the X-rays when they realized it was a sex device.

Now let me say that Mrs. Poop is the nicest, sweetest person I know. She's also the best nurse. She's very loving, caring and nurturing. She takes her job very seriously and cares for her patients, their well-being and their privacy.

But if she ever saw an X-ray of a guy with a dildo stuck up his ass, damn right she'd take a camera phone picture of his X-ray.
I'd be furious with her if she didn't.
But this is where Mrs. Poop would have been smarter than these women. You don't put it on Facebook.

And if it's just an X-ray, without a guy's name or face, you're not really compromising his privacy.

Now, I'm not saying this is the right thing to do (even though it isn't illegal it technically violates hospital policy) but it's akin to finding a bag full of money. Very few of us would actually turn it in to the police.

Nope, when you find a treasure, you take it home, share it with your loved ones and closest friends and you keep your mouth shut.

Eddy Curry Accused of Gay Sexual Harrassment

From the NY Post:

Knicks center Eddy Curry was slapped with a shocking sex-harassment suit Monday by his former driver, who claims the 6-foot-11 hoopster tried to solicit gay sex from him.
The stunning court papers claim Curry, a married father of three, repeatedly approached chauffeur David Kuchinsky "in the nude," allegedly telling him, "Look at me, Dave, look" and "Come and touch it, Dave."
Curry also made Kuchinsky perform "humiliating tasks outside the scope of his employment, such as cleaning up and removing dirty towels [Curry had ejaculated into] so that his wife would not see them," the Manhattan federal court suit says.
Kuchinsky, who is straight and Jewish, also alleges racial discrimination, saying that Curry hurled slurs at him including "f---ing Jew," "cracker," "white slave," "white devil" and "grandmaster of the KKK."

And in a disturbing episode reminiscent of some of the evidence in the manslaughter case against former Nets star Jayson Williams, Kuchinsky further claims in his suit that Curry pointed a "fully loaded" gun at him on at least two separate occasions to keep him from complaining about his treatment.
"Look, I have one in the chamber," Curry allegedly said.
Kuchinsky, who worked for Curry from October 2005 through October 2008, says he was initially hired as an around-the-clock chauffeur for Curry and his family at their Burr Ridge, Ill., mansion.
But shortly after starting work, he soon found his duties fell well outside his job description and "progressively became Curry's "house-boy,'" his suit says. He is seeking $98,000 plus compensatory damages from the injured Knick, whose contract pays him $9.4 million this year.
Kuchinsky says he is owed $68,000 in unpaid wages, as well as $25,000 in expenses for which Curry never repaid him.
"Instead of paying him, they discriminated against him, figuring that it would keep him there," said Kuchinsky's lawyer, Matthew Blit. "Imagine going into your boss's office ... and he stands up and drops his pants and he asks you take care of him. Those actions are unacceptable whether it's in a corporate office or a private home."

Story suggested by SCZA who is too busy laundering dirty towels before his wife gets home to post it himself

Why Nails Didn't Go To Work Today

Nails has been well known to use some unusual excuses for not going to work. There was the time he called in "crazy" when he thought he hallucinated people knocking on his door several times throughout the night (it was actually a neighborhood-wide search for a missing girl). One time he called in "madness" to watch the NCAA tournament with me.
Today, he called in "gay."
A gay couple from Hollywood organized "A Day Without a Gay." The protest asked people to call in "gay" from work in support of gay marriage.
Nails was happy to do his part and spent the day staring at the Visanthe Shiancoe post. Look at the comments section.

Jim Nantz Shaves His Beard

I have long suspected that Jim Nantz was gay (not that there's anything wrong with that) and was always told that he was married (as if that was proof).
Well, not anymore.
Nantz filed for divorce, claiming his marriage with Anne-Lorraine Carlsen has broken down irretrievably.

Why is Mrs. Carder Marrying a Lady?

A group of first graders at a school in San Francisco took a trip to City Hall to watch their teacher get married.
First of all, I think it's kind of strange for students to be at any teacher's wedding but in this case Erin Carder married a woman, Kerri McCoy.
Now I am not against gay marriage and I'm not against teaching kids about the gay lifestyle, so if all the parents of all the kids approved, then that's fine.
But there are a couple things here that make me a little uncomfortable with this circumstance.
I think a lot of people wouldn't mind if people were gay in their own personal lives, but there is a perception gay people are more open with their sexuality than heterosexuals. The word "flamboyant" comes to mind. And some even feel some gay people try to shove homosexuality down everyone else's throats.
Since I can't imagine a straight teacher having 18 kids at her wedding (even one at City Hall), this seems like a bit much to me.
Also, this was an official school field trip, that's totally wrong.
And more fodder for those who think a gay agenda is being pushed on our kids.

Does This Look Like a Lesbian to You?

One thing I've never understood about the gay and lesbian community is the dichotomy of their tastes. Gay men, who wish to have sex with other men, tend to pick the most effeminate men they can find. Whereas lesbians seem to typically be mannish women.
So it's no surprise that I find Lindsay Lohan's coming out to be a little incongruous with the rest of the lesbian community.
I think we all know that Lohan is a little fucked up in the head so maybe that could explain her turning to lesbianism for the happiness she can't seem to find elsewhere.
She also has an unsatisfying relationship with her father, which can be a major predictor as to which women will turn towards promiscuity or in this case lesbianism.



In this picture of Lindsay Lohan and her girlfriend Samantha Ronson you can see that Ronson looks like a lesbian, and Lohan is all made up with her tits hanging out.
This seems like a look men would like, but women, not so much.
I think Lohan has sucked so much dick in her life that she just got tired of it and decided she'd like something else for a change. I think this carpet-munching phase is just a ruse perpetrated by her management team to make her more attractive to men. In 6 months she'll be back in a major movie role, dump Ronson and do a People magazine cover with the headline "I Like Cock Again!"
Mark my words.

Clay is Gay

I guess Kelly Ripa knew what she was talking about when she objected to Clay Aiken placing his hand over her mouth.
Aiken has finally come out of the closet, tired of keeping the world's worst-kept secret.
He tells People Magazine "I cannot raise a child to lie or hide things."



In case you didn't know Aiken had a child with a female friend by artificial insemination.

The aforementioned Kelly Ripa situation is an example of how poorly this secret was kept. When Ripa said "I don't know where your hands have been," she obviously meant they were wrapped around some dude's cock, or worse, up some dude's ass. Noted lesbian Rosie O'Donnell understood the subtext of those remarks and called Kelly a homophobe. And when she and Kelly debated the issue on "The View" they both ignored the fact that Aiken was still pretending to be a straight man.

And although I have no particular fondness for Aiken, I have no reason to dislike him either. And since my stated objective in life is to "live and let live" I hope Aiken's admission will grant him some peace of mind and make him a happier person and a better father to his child.

Two Dudes Pantomime Making Out