Saturday, November 08, 2008

Drive Fast Speed Turns Me On

Nicole Scherzinger, the incredibly hot lead singer of the Pussycat Dolls, is part Hawaiian, part Russian, part Filipino and was raised by a German stepfather (hence the last name).
Evidently she felt like she needed a little black in her.
She is dating Formula 1 racing champ Lewis Hamilton.













The End of the Media As We Know It?

Many people have hailed this clip of Steve Osunsami crying on Election Night as proof of the liberal media bias, and the end of the impartial news media.



I don't mind his show of emotion. I think in this day and age we are too media savvy to buy the myth of impartial observer. We all have our biases. And many of us can do our jobs well and fairly despite them. And now that we know where Osunsami stands we can judge for ourselves how he handles future stories about Obama.

Friday, November 07, 2008

Barney Does Not Want To Leave the White House

President Bush's dog Barney realizes he's going to have to give up his home. But he isn't going to leave the White House without fight.



That was Reuters reporter Jon Decker.

I can't wait for Barney to urinate all over the White House to mark his territory for that new puppy the Obama girls are bringing.

LeBron James Likes Grease?

I find it hard to believe but evidently LeBron James is a fan of "Grease." He dressed up as Danny Zuko for Halloween and even had a custom leather jacket.



I think I speak for all Knicks fans when I say "you're the one I want, one that I want, ooh, ooh, ooh."

What Do You Say?

I recently got into a heated argument with my Canadian-speaking mother. She insists pour and poor are pronounced differently.

Some of His Ex-Teammates Probably Didn't Appreciate That

Texas coach Mack Brown dismissed backup offensive lineman Buck Burnette from the team after an offensive status update on Burnette's Facebook profile.
It said “All the hunters gather up, we have a n-word in the White House.” Except he actually used the n-word.
Burnette claims he got it in a text message from a friend and decided to make it his status update without thinking.
In college football guys beat their girlfriends, drive drunk, steal and get only a game suspension, but using a bad word gets you kicked off the team.
While that might seem incongrous I can imagine that many of his black teammates would be unhappy with Burnette and might take action against him.
But I wonder what would have happened if he had been a better player?

Another Great Thing I Learned From Erin Andrews

Erin Andrews is now the spokesgirl for a website offering cool photos for college sports fans.



Replayphotos.com offers pictures not just of sports but also shots from around campus.
For Syracuse there's this memorable picture of Jim Boeheim cutting down the net after winning the national title...

Jim Boeheim cuts down the net

and this great shot of a snow covered quad in front of Hendricks Chapel...



But I still prefer this picture.

Chase and Mrs. Poop in front of Hendricks Chapel

Bacon or Fries?

Some Colorado voters had the chance to vote with their stomachs instead of their heads or hearts.
A seat on the State Senate was won by Bob Bacon, vanquishing his greasy foe, Matt Fries.
The puns came fast and furious ("Bacon cooks up a victory," "sounds like a diner order" from the media.
It should be noted though that Fries is actually pronounced "freeze."
But you know the media, never let the facts get in the way of a good story.

Free Agent Free-for-All

MLB.com has a pretty fascinating, and very difficult game, called Free Agent Frenzy.
They give you 15 top free agents and you have to predict where they will end up, and assign a confidence number to each selection.
We can't compete against each other in a group but it should be cool to see how you do.
Picks are finalized on November 12th, and the game ends on March 1.

Thursday, November 06, 2008

The Curse Continues

Everything I like goes downhill. Usually this only involves sports, but now it seems to have extended to music.
After hearing his smash hit "Never Never Land" I checked out a few more Lyfe Jennings songs and loved them all.
Then I read about his backstory. In 1992 he went to prison for 10 years on an arson charge. When he got out, he said his time in jail forced him to get his life together.
He appeared at the Apollo Theater and won 5 straight amateur nights.
That launched his singing career, and he released albums in 2004, 2006 and again in 2008, each one getting more success than the previous one.
But all that success is at risk now as Lyfe might be headed back to jail for a long time.
Jennings's baby-mama, Joy Bounds, reports that at different times he threatend to kill her, threatened to kill her male friend, reported the car she was driving as stolen, turned off the electricity, changed the locks when she was out of town and destroyed her personal belongings. She said “90 percent of my clothes, shoes, panties, socks, jackets, etc.” were cut up, bleached and thrown in the woods and a lake.
The last incident happened in late October, and later that day Jennings came to her house, kicked the door down, and fired a warning shot into the street.
That's when Bounds called police.
When the cops arrived Jennings drove away in his 2005 Corvette, leading police on a high-speed chase which ended when Jennings crashed into a tree.
He refused a sobriety test and cops reported smelling the odor of alcohol on him.

Melo Supports Obama

Carmelo Anthony was so motivated by the election of Barack Obama that he told reporters during the shootaround that he would try to score 44 points against the Golden State Warriors.
Barack Obama is of course the 44th president, and 44 is also a special number in Syracuse history.
Unfortunately Melo only put up a Woodrow Wilson.
He did however heed Barack Obama's call for change, recently cutting off his trademark braids in favor of a more close-cropped look.


Carmelo Anthony doesn't score 44 points in honor of Obama, but he does believe in change, going with a new shorter haircut

Hard Work Produces Results

The numbers are in, and CNN's election coverage broke records across every platform.

On-air, CNN beat every broadcast and cable network Tuesday night from 8-12:30 a.m. ET with an average of 13.3 million total viewers, according to Nielsen Media Research.

ABC trailed with 12.5 million, NBC had 11.9 million, Fox News Channel posted 8.1 million, CBS averaged 7.5 million, MSBNC had 6.4 million, and FOX posted 4.7 million. In all, close to 80 million viewers tuned in to watch election night coverage.

CNN's 2008 Election Night coverage also resulted in the highest primetime ratings in the network's 28-year history. With an average of 12.3 million total viewers tuning in during primetime (8-11p), CNN had 36 percent advance over Fox News (9 million) and an impressive 109 percent over MSNBC (5.9 million). CNN also easily won the 25-34 and 18-34 demos. Compare to 2004, CNN also had the largest gains in prime time for ages 25-54, doubling its audience, up 102 percent, while FNC only increased 4 percent and MSNBC was up 87 percent.

On Election Day, CNN.com delivered the largest audience in its history with 282.5 million page views and 30 million unique visitors.

Patriots Fire Jew-Hating Sharpie-Loving Cheerleader

The Patriots kicked Caitlin Davis off the cheerleading squad after two photos of her appeared on Facebook. In the pictures Caitlin is drawing on the face and body of a pass-out friend. Mostly she drew penises and wrote the word penis on the guy's face. But the swastikas and the words "I'm Jewish" went a little too far.
Patriots owner Robert Kraft is a prominent Jew and active in the Anti-Defamation League.
I'm not all that upset about this, it's probably just a stupid prank, but Davis should have known better. She represents the Patriots and as a company they can't afford to offend part of their fan base like this over some stupid 18-year old slut.






Allen Iverson Practice Redux

At his introductory to the press conference with the Detroit Pistons, Allen Iverson vows to do whatever the coach asks him to do. And then Joe Dumars says the magic word:



Funny, and good he can kind of laugh about it, but sad in that the most memorable moment of his great NBA career is the original practice speech.

Go Ahead Take That Paper Out of There

The ad for LeBron's new After Six sneakersis absolutely hysterical in an understated, porno-spoof kind of way. It's made even better by the presence of Nicole Scherzinger, of the Pussycat Dolls and my Top 10 Hottest Women Alive List.
It's pretty long, but enjoyable.

Wednesday, November 05, 2008

We Need a Good Jew in the White House

It didn't take long but Barack Obama asked Congressman Rahm Emanuel as his chief of staff. Emanuel would have to sacrifice his own promising political career, and move his 3 young kids, but he is expected to accept.
This assauges some of my fears about how Obama's ties to radical Muslims would affect American policy towards Israel.
Emanuel is not one of those "in name only" Jews (as many Poopheads are). He went to a conservative Jewish Day School and he and his wife (she converted) send their kids to the same one.

Rahm Emanuel, exactly the type of Jew we need in Obama's Administration

Rahm was reportedly the inspiration for the Josh Lyman character on the "West Wing." His brother, Ari, is a Hollywood agent and the inspiration for Ari Gold on "Entourage."

Please JoePa, Hang It Up

Penn State Coach Joe Paterno proves once again that he should be sitting at home in a rocking chair, not coaching a college football team.
JoePa is going to need surgery to fix his leg and hip, injuries he suffered while kicking a football during practice.
We all know that Paterno is no longer running the team (during games, he sits in the press box drooling on his shirt and shitting in a bag) but he seems intent to hang on to his coaching title until he can beat out Bobby Bowden for most career wins.



At his weekly press conference he said "I haven't got the slightest idea what the BCS is. Is it the BCS or the BSC? I don't know."
I find it hard to believe he doesn't know what the BCS is. I bet he just forgot.

Interesting Election Tidbits

Obama won Manhattan 85% to 14%, he got 490,000 votes.
He won D.C. 93 to 7, getting 210,000 votes.
And he got 243,000 in LA county but only won 60 to 38. I wonder how many of those were Hollywood actors and actreesses. I saw where Kim Kardashian voted.

New England is very blue. Barack Obama won every single county in Vermont, New Hampshire, Massachusets, Rhode Island and Connecticut.

Never have Alaska and Hawaii been so important to a presidential election. A Vice Presidential candidate from Alaska (McCain won 62 to 36) and the new President raised in Hawaii (he won 72-27).

Voters 18 to 29 went for Obama more than 2 to 1.
95% of African-Americans voted for Barack Obama. They also made up 13% of those who voted, roughly their percentage in the population at large.

People who earn $200,000 or more made up 6% of the voters, even though Obama says they make up 2% of the total population. They went for Obama 52 to 46, meaning they don't seem to care if he raises their taxes.

Democrats made up 39% of the voters, compared to 32% who were Republicans, meaning a surprisingly high number (at least to me), 29%, were registered independents.

Nearly 80% of Jews went for Barack Obama, even better than John Kerry's number. And proof those e-mail campaign scare tactics did not work.

Gay marriage lost in Alabama, Florida and California. And gay couples were barred from adopting in Arkansas. The fact is gay marriage never wins when it's put to a vote of the people. Now I don't believe gay marriage should be illegal, but nor do I want to live in a country where activist judges can push an agenda and go against the will of the people. If it happens with gay marriage it will happen with something else. The will of the people should rule, for better or worse.

Michigan approved medical marijuana, and Washington voted in favor of doctor assisted suicide.

In San Francisco, they voted down a measure to rename the Oceanside Water Pollution Control Plant to the George W. Bush Sewage Plant. San Franciscans also voted down a measure to decriminalize prostitution. Those idiots.

The NFL is Poop - Week 9

Halfway There
The Tennessee Titans are halfway to a perfect regular season. They aren't getting nearly as much attention as the Patriots did last year. And I have feeling that they won't pursue perfection with as much zeal as the Pats did last year. When the Titans wrap up everything (if they're still undefeated), I expect them to shut it down.
But even without a perfect season, I still think they have the stuff to win the Super Bowl. They have a great aggressive defense, a bruising running game and a QB who won't make mistakes.
They beat a game Green Bay Packers team by doing just enough.

Rob Bironas kicks the game-winning field to keep the Titans perfect

Off the Schneid
The Cincinnati Bengals finally won a game, beating the Jacksonville Jaguars. The nearly blew a 21-3 lead, but held on by breaking up a 2-point conversion with a little more than a minute left.
Quarterback Ryan Fitzpatrick who looked inept in his first Bengals start, actually looked pretty good completing 21 of 31 passes and throwing 2 touchdowns including one to Chad Ocho Cinco.



First Half MVP
Kurt Warner already has 2 MVP awards and he could be on his way to a third. With 16 TDs and only 6 INTs Warner is having a great statistical season, and he's leading the perennially disappointing Cardinals to a 5-3 record and a division lead.

Kurt Warner could get his third MVP award

Putrid
The Oakland Raiders turned in one of the worst offensive performances in history in a 24-0 loss to the Atlanta Falcons. 77 total yards is the fewest in the NFL in nearly 4 years. 3 first downs is the fewest since the merger in 1970. They punted 6 times, and turned it over twice. Their longest drive was 36 yards and it came late in the fourth quarter after the Falcons went to prevent defense. But that drive ended in an interception.
The Falcons first 3 drives resulted in touchdowns, their fourth a field goal. After that they basically shut it down and cruised to victory.

Jamarcus Russell went 6 for 19 for 31 yards

Brett Favre is Not To Be Trusted
The Jets unveiled a new game plan, and it led them to victory over the Buffalo Bills. I think it was called "Don't Let Favre Fuck It Up." After a series of games in which Favre's foolish mistakes, the Jets reined in the old gunslinger and got a huge division victory (on the road) out of it. Thanks to great defense, even though Favre threw one of his patented off the back foot interceptions for a touchdown, the Jets prevailed nonetheless.

Jets coaches put the shackles on Brett Favre

Game of the Week
Tampa Bay Buccaneers 30 Kansas City Chiefs 27

The Chiefs jumped out to a big lead thanks to a long TD pass by their wide receiver Mark Bradley to their quarterback Tyler Thigpen. But they did what losing teams do, and they blew the lead. And other than some conservative play-calling (every time they called runs on first and second down they missed on third) it wasn't really Herman Edwards's fault. They just did what losing teams do. They committed a penalty on 3rd and 1 and came up short on another. But the big play was the fumble by Jamal Charles. It came deep in Bucs territory, set up a touchdown on the next play, and came the play right after the Chiefs defense got what should have been a game-clinching turnover.

I don't think this one was Herm's fault

Game of Next Week
Indianapolis at Pittsburgh

If the Pittsburgh defense plays the way they did against the Redskins, we're going to see Jim Sorgi in this one. If the Colts lose, they'll be nearly eliminated from division contention, and their wildcard hopes will be very slim as well.

Cheerleader of the Week
Aisha El-Amin of the Cincinnati Ben-Gals
Aisha has also cheered for the Miami Dolphins and Atlanta Hawks. She has a rottweiler, now that's a real cheerleader's dog. "The Notebook" is one of her favorite movies. And her personal quote is from the Koran.







A Brief Rant About the Redskins
One of the most disappointing games I can remember. That was one of the worst offensive displays I've ever seen. The game starting so promisingly and then Jim Zorn folded his tent and decided to play field position. When you have so many chances and fail to take advantage of them, eventually the other team hits back. I have no idea why an offensive line that had been so good, all of the sudden went so bad. But I think a lot of it had to do with the coverage. Every time Jason Campbell dropped back he looked downfield and had no one to throw to. This game really exposed the Redskins as a second-tier contender.

If The Super Bowl Were Played Today
Tennessee Titans 17 New York Giants 16

The Giants played great in dispatching the Cowboys, but the Titans have yet to have that letdown. Seeing how aggressive Tennessee is in pass coverage, I think this would make a great game if it were to happen down the road.

I Couldn't Resist

I know this came out about three weeks ago and a lot of you have probably seen it, but I'm sure there are some of you who haven't.
I originally decided not to post the story about Swedish hockey player Jan Huokko because it was so lascivious and it happened overseas where so much crazy shit happens, but I changed my mind because the story is just too damn good.
Fans of AIK pelted the ice with dildos to taunt Leksand's defenseman Huokko.



This was all in reference to a sex tape Huokko recorded on his cell phone that got leaked out on the internet. In the tape Huokko can be seen with a dildo in his mouth, and in his ass.
WARNING!!!!!!!!!!! Link is very not safe for work.

Song of the Week

"A Change is Gonna Come" - Sam Cooke
45 years after Sam Cooke died the change he prophesied has finally come.

Tuesday, November 04, 2008

Palin in 2040

For all the attacks on Sarah Palin during this campaign and on her family (aimed at her pregnant daughter and son with Down's Syndrome), nobody dared level an attack and her 7-year-old daughter.
Piper was undeniably the star waving and smiling and looking cute all the while. She quickly became my favorite and Mrs. Poop's favorite of the many kids of candidates. Even liberals would have to admit this is one adorable little girl.

Piper Palin shares a laugh with John McCain
Piper pets her future brother-in-law Levin
Piper waves to her adoring fans
Piper takes the mic
Piper is tired of being on the road
Piper raked in the dough from the tooth fairy
Piper in a St. Louis Blues jersey
bye Piper, we'll miss you

But the best Piper moment is also her first moment on the national stage.



Mrs. Poop loves that lick, pat down the baby's hair move.

Are We Ready Yet?

2Pac (who is not living on a tropical island with Biggie, nor is he living under the stairs at TON's parents house wearing clothes made out of TallSkott's discarded socks) is probably enjoying this presidential election, wherever he is. In a song 2Pac said we weren't ready for what we may be about to see:

"Even though it seems heaven sent
We ain't ready, to see a black president."

And the name of the song that carried this prophesy? Changes



I know the above lyric was initially recorded for another song, but it was first released on "Changes."

Why Pizza Parlor Derek is Voting for Obama

This sign flew over Invesco Field in Denver before the Broncos game against the Dolphins.

McCain is a Raiders fan sign flies over Invesco Field

As PPD always says "I hate the Raiders, but I especially hate the Raiders fans."

The McCain Face

Will John McCain be making this face later today (or tomorrow) when election results are announced?