Pour Out a Little Iced Tea, and a Little Lemonade

Arnold Palmer passed away at age 87, after living a full life in which he had a drink named after him.



Nails puts a little shot of vodka in his Arnold Palmer and calls in a John Daly.

Andy Samberg joked that he wanted take the music from Beyonce's "Lemonade" album, and put Ice-T lyrics over it to create a new album called "Arnold Palmer."

Somebody Get Her a Fendi Bag

I have been in love with Britt McHenry for a long time, ever since the first time I saw her covering the Redskins.
If Erin Andrews can get a huge mainstream career off being press-box hot, what could McHenry do with much better looks, much better reporting, and a better personality?
Andrews is so wooden and cheesy, McHenry can actually have a real chat, without a script and be funny and charming. When her and Lindsay Czarniak get together it's totes adorbs dorbs.
But any chance McHenry had of someday hosting Dancing with the Stars or filling in for Kelly Ripa probably went out the window when she was caught on camera berating a tow company employee.



It seems like Britt was eating at a Chinese restaurant and her car was towed.
Anyone would be upset in that circumstance. Many of us have been victims of overzealous towing. A huge fight broke out between IHOP and McDonald's in Fair Lawn over this. We also don't know if the woman was rude to her first or what else might have been said.
Obviously, she should not have acted this way. It's not acceptable to treat people like this, under any circumstances. But there are a lot of mitigating factors here that make it less bad, in my opinion. I don't think a suspension was necessary, as this had nothing to do with her employer, except for maybe some minor embarrassment.
While doing research for this post (google image search), I notice a lot of glam pictures of here, which kind of makes me believe she is one of these women who just wants the attention, the dresses, the hair, the accolades, she doesn't care about sports or the news or anything more than being famous. I have met a lot of women, and some men, like this in my time.
And of course, because she is so gorgeous, she probably gets everything she wants all the time so she never learned how to react in adverse situations with combative people, because she's never been in them before.

By the way, the headline is a reference to the LL Cool J song "Around the Way Girl" when he says a "Fendi bag and a bad attitude" puts him in a good mood. Since she puts me in a good mood, and she has a bad attitude, Britt is just a Fendi bag away from perfection.

Booyah!

I did not like Stuart Scott. I met him once, he seemed like a nice guy but I didn't really know him. All I knew of him was his on-air persona, which I hated.
I hated his ridiculous catchphrases and his jock-sniffing. And I almost never watched him.
I didn't watch the ESPYs and although I knew he had cancer, I didn't realize how close to death he was.
I was genuinely shocked and saddened by the news when I heard it.
The more I read and saw about it, I do admire the way he handled his battle and I respect him as a man.
And he was very nice and cool and funny when I met him during my Stump the Schwab appearance.
But as a SportsCenter anchor he sucked.

Jim Boeheim Acts Like a Dick

This isn't exactly breaking news because Jim Boeheim has been doing this for years. Because of his success and his position at the University he feels he can say and do anything he wants with no repercussions. He can make a knee-jerk statement about child molestation accusations and get away with it, and now he insulted a reporter, ESPN's Andy Katz, after Syracuse's loss to Connecticut.



It's not 100% clear what Boeheim was angry about. It's possible this dates back to Katz's reporting on the Bernie Fine scandal. But here's a theory I tend to believe. It comes from Katz's report on James Southerland's suspension.
In the first half Katz reported that Southerland's academic issue was regarding "two paragraphs" in a paper. At the time I discussed this with Billy, and we both thought it seemed implausible that an issue that minor could have taken 6 weeks to resolve.
Maybe Southerland lied to Katz, knowing the University would likely not refute his statement (to protect his privacy), maybe someone else did, or maybe Katz's source told him the truth. Either way, it's possible Boeheim did not wish Katz to share that information. Maybe he didn't think Katz should have been pumping JaySouth for info, maybe he thought the conversation was off the record. Not sure exactly how that might have played out, but it seems third most likely reason for him to be angry, with the first two being they lost and that Boeheim is just a dick.

There Will Be No Beano

ESPN college football analyst Beano Cook passed away. His former partner Chris Fowler did a touching tribute to him, but unfortunately it only included a small snippet of Beano's most famous moment: "I can hear him!" (at about 2:05 of this video)

We've All Had These Moments, Not on TV Though

We've all had moments of uncontrollable laughter, where you just can't stop laughing no matter what. Most of us aren't on TV when it happens to us though. A recent incident at work (which I can't post video of due to google alerts) reminded me of the king of the on-air meltdown, Charley Steiner.



Notice how he touched his right ear every time? What was he doing? Signaling to his wife and kids? Telling the director to go to break?

Btw, I'm pretty sure the reason he was laughing at Mitch Green is because they played the soundbite of him saying of Mike Tyson "like a sissy, a homo, he ran."

He Calls Em Like He Sees Em

ESPN has suspended host Tony Kornheiser from his television talk show "Pardon the Interruption" for two weeks because of comments he made on the radio last week about SportsCenter anchor Hannah Storm's clothing.

Kornheiser announced the suspension on his Washington D.C. radio show Tuesday morning, calling his remarks about Storm intemperate and stupid.

"As the result of this, I have been sent to the sidelines of PTI for a while," Kornheiser said.

What Kornheiser said, on his weekday local radio show on ESPN's Washington, D.C. affiliate Friday, was that Storm was on-air in a "horrifying outfit" with "red go-go boots" and a skirt "way too short for somebody her age." And her shirt was too tight and looked "like she has sausage casing wrapping around her upper body." He added the kicker: "She's what I would call a Holden Caulfield fantasy at this point."

Kornheiser said he had called Storm to personally apologize for the remarks.

"If you put a live microphone in front of somebody, eventually that person will say something wrong," Kornheiser said on his show Tuesday. "This was one of the times I said something wrong."



I can see the point that Storm is Kornheiser's colleague (even if only in name) and one should not comment about the physical appearance or dress of a colleague, especially in a derogatory way. But everything Kornheiser said is true. Storm consistently dresses like she's a hot young thing.
Let me tell you something Hannah Storm, I've googled Erin Andrews, I've studied pictures of Erin Andrews, I've seen Erin Andrews naked, and you are no Erin Andrews.

I'm sure Storm didn't like the comments but she could have prevented this by looking in the mirror before she left the house, then looking at her driver's license and realizing she's 47 years-old.

I ask you lady Poopheads (and gay Poopheads) don't you pretty much agree with everything Kornheiser said? Which is possible even if you think he probably shouldn't have said it.

Bob Knight Breaks Down the 2-3 Zone

The thing that got Bob Knight fired from Indiana is the same thing that makes him a great color analyst for college basketball games. In the words of Butch McRae’s mother, Bob Knight “don’t take no shit.”

Knight is no-nonsense. He’s not interested in making himself the show or selling books and coining catchphrases. He just wants to wear sweatshirts and talk about the game. And the way he breaks down the game is better than anyone else ESPN has.

Here’s Knight breaking down Syracuse’s 2-3 Zone:

They Got Syracuse Downpat

So ESPN was casting for a new series of college basketball commercials. The premise: "students" from a bunch of schools were cold-calling people getting them to watch more college basketball. The casting director issued a list of requirements for each school, hoping to capture the essence of that university. Here's a few of the better ones:

[ DUKE UNIVERSITY ]
MALE. Our guy for Duke UNIVERSITY is a smart, with it, young WHITE male. He's handsome. He's from money. He is, in short, the kind of guy, everyone can't stand. He is the kind of guy everyone wants to be.

[ CONNECTICUT ]
MALE. Connecticut is all things Connecticut. He's a little bit older.
He's a little bit thicker around the waist. He's WHITE. He's also competitive. Very. Waspy, blue blood.

[ TENNESSEE ]
FEMALE. Tennessee is orange crazy. The ice tray in her orange fridge, that freezes the water she dyes orange, is that orange. The party girl cowboy hat she wears is a white and orange zebra print. The tattoo on her lower back is Pantone 3 for that Tennessee orange. The only thing that's not orange is her dog, which is the20mascot Smokey. Did we mention she's crazy? A slutty girl who would hang out at the cowgirl hall of fame.

[ GEORGETOWN ]
FEMALE. Georgetown, a 4.36 GPA who's lived in 9 world-class cities, but all the time in her sister's shadow (her GPA is 4.37). She's sort of the female Duke, except most people like her. Think Reese Witherspoon.

[ MEMPHIS ]
MALE. What can we say about Memphis? He's a southern BLACK kid, really culinary and polite. He's artistic, and draws comic books really well.

[ OHIO STATE ]
MALE. He looks like Jim Tressle (head coach of Ohio State football) in the dress code. Red sweater vest. Always. Doesn't care for swearing either — of course we never really test this out as they are commercial advertisements and no one swears in them, but it's true nevertheless.
A Republican.

[ OKLAHOMA STATE ]
FEMALE. She's a fun loving girl, Oklahoma born and bred. Decided not to travel out of State so she should be closer to home. She's a flirt.
She's a hot chick.

[ SYRACUSE ]
MALE. Jewish kid from Long Island that is loving the college experience. It has opened up a world he never knew existed. All you can eat buffets in the cafeteria — who knew? To Syracuse, everything is a party.

ESPN decided not to go with the ad campaign, evidently not approving the racial and school stereotyping of the casting director.

The full list.