3000 Words

The $18.3M first prize for the million-dollar buy-in tournament at the World Series of Poker, won by Antonio Esfandiari.

Half Pooh, Half Poop



Coors Light uses a famous Seinfeld quote ("they're real and they're spectacular") in an ad. Jerry Seinfeld must have gotten paid for it because he looks pleased.

I Think I Would Have to Agree

"Albert Pooh Holes is really, really good."
-Adam Wainwright, St. Louis Cardinals pitcher

Ok, so I took that a little out of context for humor. Here's Wainwright's full quote: "I don't know how anybody could ever be better than he is. Ever. No offense to Henry Aaron and all those guys. I'm sorry, Hank. But Albert Pujols is really, really good."

The Fantastic Pooh Holes is having a transcendant season, challenging for the Triple Crown. Excluding known steroid users his 2009 numbers may go down as the best year in the past 50 seasons.

Albert the Destroyer

The Devastating Pooh Holes knocks out two Padres in one inning.

Brandon Backe Must Be Crazy

Astros pitcher Brandon Backe and Cardinals first baseman Albert Pooh Holes exchanged words on the field prior to Wednesday's game at Minute Maid Park and had to be separated by Astros manager Cecil Cooper.



At issue was a play in the eighth inning of Tuesday's game, when Pooh Holes collided with Astros rookie catcher J.R. Towles at home plate in a 5-3 victory over the Astros.



Pooh Holes called the Astros' clubhouse 30 minutes following the game to apologize to Towles.

"It's apparent that we don't like each other," Backe said Wednesday. "That's OK. There are plenty of other people I don't like in this game. The competition between he and I just escalated."

As the Astros were completing batting practice, Backe said Pooh Holes approached him coming off the field. The two were seen near first base having an exchange before Cooper intervened.



Backe said he did not have a problem with Pooh Holes' apology, but took offense to being confronted on the field. According to Backe, Pooh Holes was upset that he "kept pressing on" about the situation.

"I felt violated. I felt he confronted me at the wrong time," said Backe, who did not pitch in the three-game series. "I don't think it was very professional on his part. Cooper was there and heard everything. He had to say his peace to me, and I said my peace to him and that's it."

When approached after taking batting practice, Pooh Holes first declined to discuss the incident before saying it was a non-issue.

"I already apologized and it's over with," said Pooh Holes , who hit two home runs against the Astros on Wednesday in a 6-4 Cardinals win. "He had a problem with me calling over there (to the clubhouse). You guys don't need to make this bigger than it is."

Towles said he was told by several people that the collision "looked deliberate" but otherwise had no problem with Pooh Holes' slide.

"He apologized to me and I accepted his apology," Towles said. "It's all said and done and over with. I thought it was a little bit more than he needed to do, but then I thought I might have lost sight of where the plate was and maybe I was too much in front blocking the plate."

Cooper declined to discuss the incident. But Cardinals manager Tony La Russa issued a warning to Towles earlier in the day before the incident between Pooh Holes and Backe. In Monday's game, Towles was involved in a home-plate collision with Troy Glaus in the ninth inning.

"I thought Albert did a fantastic job sliding to take his legs out," La Russa said. "The kid is not giving anybody room to slide, so that's what we teach. He's going to get blasted one of these days."

Fun With Numbers

San Diego Padres relief pitcher Scott Linebrink, appearances:

2004: 73
2005: 73
2006: 73

Through 90 games, he's pitched in 41 games, which puts him on pace for 73 games (I rounded down because he can't pitch in 4/5 of a game).

St. Louis Cardinals first baseman The Fantabulous Pooh Holes, batting average:
2004: .331
2005: .330
2006: .331

He's only batting .315 so far this year, but has plenty of time for improvement.

This blog, page views last week:
Tuesday: 150
Wednesday: 150
Thursday: 137
Friday: 137
Saturday: 85
Sunday: 87

So close.

The Most Amazing Stat I've Ever Seen

Of all the wonderful things to love about the Magnificent Pooh Holes his consistency is one of them. For me, who loves numbers, almost as much as I love the Amazing Pooh Holes, the sheer impossibility of this stat confounds me. Before getting hurt last year and missing about 20 games these were the at bat totals for Pooh Holes for his first 5 years in the major leagues:

2001 - 590
2002 - 590
2003 - 591
2004 - 592
2005 - 591

I swear this is true, you can look it up.



Update: I completely forgot that I actually wrote about this statistical anomaly last year.

Karma Smacks Pooh Holes

In Monday's game against the Brewers Pooh Holes was up against Jeff Suppan.
Suppan got ahead of Pujols 0-2 before Pujols fouled off a pitch, took two balls and fouled off another. After the next pitch he was awarded first base by home plate umpire Dan Iassogna.
No one noticed the mistake.
Pooh Holes was promptly erased on a double play by Scott Rolen to end the inning.

Perfect

Albert Pooh Holes scored a perfect 100 on his U.S. citizenship test.
The St. Louis Cardinals' star became a U.S. citizen during a ceremony at the Courthouse. Pujols' wife Diedre arranged to have about two dozen relatives and friends watch U.S. District Judge E. Richard Webber swear in Pujols.
Chester Moyer, the officer in charge of the U.S. Citizen and Immigration Service office in St. Louis, said Thursday that Diedre Pujols served as her husband's tutor. Moyer said Pujols spent about a year preparing for the citizenship exam.
"He even answered a bunch of additional questions and gave us more answers than we asked," Moyer said. "He clenched his fist and said, 'I got 100 percent!'
"He just had a grin from ear to ear," Moyer said. "He was thrilled to become a citizen."
The ceremony was open to the public, but there was no publicity about Pujols' participation. He was the only person sworn in.
Pujols grew up in the Dominican Republic, moved with his father to the Kansas City area when he was 16, was graduated from Fort Osage High School in Independence, Mo., in 1998. He was selected by the Cardinals in the 13th round of the 1999 amateur draft after playing baseball at Maple Woods College in Kansas City.
In six major league seasons, Pujols has 250 homers, 758 RBIs and a .332 batting average. He was the 2005 NL MVP and has finished second three times
Soon after the citizenship ceremony, Pujols flew to Florida to prepare for the opening of spring training.

Nemesis

Albert Pooh Holes hit a 2 run walk off single last night to give the Cardinals a 6-5 win. That extends his dominance of Brad Lidge whose career he seems to have ruined. Pooh Holes won Game 5 of the NLCS with a monster home run off Lidge. Lidge is 1-5 this season with 6 blown saves and a 5.21 ERA.

Pooh Holes now has 4 walkoff hits this year and 10 in the past 4 years, trailing only David Ortiz in both categories.

He's Hurt, The Big Russian is Hurt

Ok, he's not Russian but this proves that he's not a machine, he's a man. A potentially historic season by Albert Pooh Holes was thwarted by an oblique injury. One third of the way through the season he had 25 homer and 65 RBI (pace for 75 and 195). He definitely won't approach those magic numbers, even if he is only out for two weeks (he could miss as much as a month and a half). It may also hinder his pursuit of a more amazing but more insignificant statistical achivement.
Check out his at bat totals for his career so far:
2001: 590
2002: 590
2003: 591
2004: 592
2005: 591

I could not make this up, but the odds of something like that are astronomical.

Good Day for People With Cool Names

Last night Albert Pujols hit a home run and drove in three runs, bringing his season totals to 17 and 41. That puts him on pace for 81 homers and 195 RBI. Check out how ESPN suggests pronouncing his name.
Joffrey Lupul (spell it backwards) scored 4 goals in the Anaheim Mighty Ducks 4-3 victory over the Colorado Avalanche.