The Most Wonderful Post of the Year

Diesel in Maine in 2007:



Diesel in Maine in 2008:


Diesel in Maine in 2009:


Diesel in Maine in 2010:


Diesel in Maine in 2011:

Diesel in Maine in 2012

Diesel in Maine in 2013

Once in a Lifetime

I was blessed this year with the opportunity to attend the All-Star Game Home Run Derby at CitiField. A good friend of mine has connections throughout Major League Baseball and was able to hook me up with tickets. At first he offered me a pair of standing room only tickets but because of Papa Poop's advanced age I elected for a pair of seats. He warned me the seats would be high, but I graciously told him I was just going to be happy to be there. And I was. I was thrilled to be going, until I got to the parking gate.

$35 to park! An outrage! But I was too late to get a spot under the overpass, I didn't want to use Nails's trick and drive into downtown Flushing, so I paid my money and took my spot.

The first thing I discovered was a huge popup Modell's store in a tent in the parking lot. They really did a good job with merchandising, thinking of everything, including an All-Star Game case for your iPhone.

Of course they had All-Star game jerseys and t-shirt jerseys for the local players (Harvey, Wright, Cano, Rivera) and a few other stars (Harper, Cabrera, Davis and surprisingly, Domonic Brown).

I bought the Matt Harvey ($25) shir-zey and immediately changed into it.

On the way out of the store I saw Cecil Fielder signing autographs, but elected not to wait on the long line that was developing.

Eventually I took my seat in the 500 level, midway down the left field line and had a pretty good view of the entire field.

Because I wanted to get there early, I ended up sitting for a while, we saw some players take batting practice, but mostly nothing was going on, so by 7:55 we were anxious for the Derby to get started. But for some reason we had to listen to Pitbull perform. First he did "Don't Stop the Party" and then after 8:00 PM, when we were expecting to get started he performed "Feel This Moment," better known as the song with the "Take On Me" sample.

This is how his stage and pyrotechnics looked from my seat.

And he sounded even worse. It was as if his microphone wasn't hooked up to the speakers, couldn't hear the lyrics, just the pre-taped music they were pumping in.

Finally the Derby started and it was awesome. Sure, it would have been cool to be in the outfield with a chance to catch some homers, but our seats were actually pretty good. It seemed like every homer by a righty was flying right past us. We had a great view of each one of the bombs blasted by Yoenis Cespedes in his amazing first round performance.

I will admit that the Derby did drag on a little in the middle especially because it is a made-for-TV event and the commercial breaks were very long. Also adding to the lull, Cespedes had to hit in the second round (to raise money for charity) even though his first round total was higher than anyone else combined number.

Luckily they did have cool entertainment like a Home Run Derby between two top high school players. These kids were jacking bombs. And aided by their aluminum bats they were pulling more than the Major Leaguers with the wood, the kids were ripping shots high, and straight down the lines. They also had other diversions including Frisbee-catching dogs.

Other than the mid-Derby lull, and the parking fee, there was one more negative to the Derby (and not the heat, which actually wasn't much of a factor after 6pm), the in-stadium announcers, Mike (Greenberg) [corrected] and Mike (Golic). I agree that it's hard to say something interesting about 100+ home runs, but though I dislike their daily schtick, it was turned up even more for this event, with these two saying the dumbest cheesiest shit, including imploring the crowd to cheer at least three times during each player's round.

So we had a transcendent performance in round one, doldrums in round two and then a stirring finale. Bryce Harper put up a decent 8 in his turn then Cespedes blew right through, saving the best for last, with a monster shot to center to clinch the victory.

Though I doubt anything could top Cespedes's performance, I enjoyed the event so much I would gladly go again, even if I have to wait until I'm 85 for it to be back in CitiField.

The Universe's Favorite 80s Sitcom

Another crazy Universe moment occurred recently. I'm lying in bed reading a Sports Illustrated article about Bob Uecker and Mrs. Poop is watching King of Queens. The article included a picture of the cast of "Mr. Belvedere" so of course I started singing the theme song, "streaks on the china..."
Within 15 minutes this scene appeared on King of Queens:



Now I know I talk about Mr Belvedere a lot, and sing the theme song frequently, but not so often, that I wouldn't be amazed by the Universe's ability to deliver it to me within a few minutes of asking for it.

Chase Really Wants This

Maybe the coolest product ever goes on sale today.

I'm not sure if I have the entire story correct but it seems there is a site where you make your own original Lego creations, and if enough people like it (10,000) Lego will review it and potentially start selling as a boxed set. And the designer gets 1% of the net sales, which may seem small but it really doesn't take a genius to figure out how cool the DeLorean will be. In this case the designer is going to donate his cut to the Michael J Fox Foundation. Obviously Lego needed to strike a licensing deal with the owners of the rights to Back to the Future, but with that out of the way how long before we see another Back to the Future themed set on display in my living room.

Save the clock tower!

Note: It may be a few weeks before Lego stores actually have it. But it should be on sale in time for Chase's birthday, because like I said, he really wants this.

Song of the Week

"Safety Dance" - Men Without Hats
30 years ago this song was a big hit. And there still hasn't been another song to use the word "imbecile" as effectively.

Maybe They Should Have Spent a Little More Time Looking at His Face

Jimmy Fallon (underrated show by the way) thought it would be funny to send Mets pitcher Matt Harvey around the city to ask people questions about Matt Harvey.



I know for 100% certainty that I would be able to spot Matt Harvey on a street, even in a crowd. How these people, even the ones who saw the naked ESPN pictures, couldn't recognize him is beyond me. Maybe, like JLeary, they spent too much time look at other parts of the pictures, and not Harvey's face.

Release Point, Maybe?

Here at the Poop we love first pitches, interesting ones, celebrity ones, good ones, bad ones. Especially the bad ones. And this one by pop sensation Carley Rae Jepsen may be the best (worst) I've ever seen.



I love "Call Me Maybe" (SOTW, 5/30/12) and I'm willing to forgive her since she's Canadian, but I would happily instruct her on the mechanics of throwing so she can learn the proper release point.

Half Right

Every year I say I am not going to pay attention to the All-Star game, and every year I still get sucked into the selection process. This year I had a good excuse because two very deserving players, with great backstories were on the ballot for the fans to select as the final addition to the roster. Fans got it half right.

Blue Jays relief pitcher Steve Delabar is 5-1 with a 1.71 ERA. He has some impressive advanced stats as well, striking out 12.43 batters per 9 innings and allowing only 1 homer in 41 innings (could be an element of luck there). But forget his stats, look at his story. He spent 6 years in the minor leagues and in 2009 he fractured his elbow.

It was repaired with a steel plate and 9 screws. He pretty much gave up on his baseball dream at became a substitute teacher at baseball coach at a high school in Kentucky. As the arm recovered he realized he was throwing harder than ever before. He got signed to a minor league deal with the Mariners in 2011 and by the end of the year he made his debut in the majors. Hard not to root for a guy who has been through that.



And then there's Puig who absolutely set the world on fire since his debut in June. He's batting .391 with 8 homers and 19 RBI in what amounts to basically a quarter of the season. His OPS of 1038 is incredibly and would be even higher if he ever walked. And his offense is the least exciting part of his game.



I have always had a fascination with strong-armed outfielders and throws like that make me want to watch Puig everyday. So why didn't the fans vote him in? There are some stuffy old people who hate young guys, and think they need to earn their spot, and 40 games is not enough to do so. Well, I say the all-star game is supposed to be fun and if you think watching Freddie Freeman would be more fun than watching Puig, then you are a strange and sick individual.

What makes me angrier about this is that the Blue Jays and Braves formed some unholy alliance to combine votes and get Delabar and Freeman into the game, and it seems to have worked.

The Best Prank in TV History

Whenever there's a disaster someone tries to call a local station and yell out BabaBooey or something similar. It happened during the OJ chase, it's happened to Ali Velshi, it's happened millions of times, but never this spectacularly.



KTVU in San Francisco got duped into reporting the "names" of the four pilots involved in the Asiana 214 Crash

Sum Ting Wong (Something Wrong)
Wi Tu Lo (We Too Low)
Ho Lee Fuk (Holy Fuck)
Bang Ding Ow (Bang Ding Ow)

I'm still holding out hope that this didn't really happened and we've all been duped by an elaborate hoax.

I Told You That Bitch Crazy

Everyone thought it was funny when Kris Benson and his then hot young wife Anna told Penthouse Magazine that they like to have sex at stadia and in parking lots. Except Pirates manager Llyod McClendon who said he doesn't care what his players do between the sheets, only what they do between the lines.

Most people found it amusing when Anna told Howard Stern that if Kris ever cheated on her she would fuck the whole team as revenge.

Fewer people were laughing when she showed up at the Mets Christmas party for underprivileged kids with her boobs hanging out.

Almost no one is laughing now, as Anna Benson is accused of barging into Kris's house with a gun and a metal baton, wearing a bullet-proof vest and making threats. You can listen to the 911 call he made while she was in his house.

The couple is going through a difficult divorce right now and she says she doesn't have any money and he says she was demanding he pay her $30,000.

All I know is, like Anna Benson herself, this story is only going to get uglier.

Matt Harvey Naked

Mets pitcher Matt Harvey agreed to appear in ESPN Magazine's The Body Issue, which every year features naked athletes, their bodies obscured only by the tools of their trade.
I really have no opinion on it, I think it's a desperate ploy to get attention for their magazine, not an artistic statement about the beauty of the human form. I don't think looking at the dudes for say three seconds automatically makes you gay. And I don't think the chicks they've had in here have even looked that great, even though many of them are very hot in other contexts.
So here it is Matt Harvey fans, our ace for the next 10 years, with no clothes on:

Maybe they should have had him pose with his girlfriend Anne V.

She's done some similar modeling

Song of the Week

"That Lady" - Isley Brothers
Probably the Isleys best known song, hit #6 on the U.S. chart in 1973. Lot of other good contenders from this year but I love this one because it was an early forebear of the great disco funk music to come. It's also one of Chase's favorites because it's in Swiffer commercials.

I Have an Eye For Talent

Very early on in the career of Jon Bones Jones, after I knew he had two brothers at Syracuse, and after I'd seen him fight a couple times, I knew he was destined for greatness. Jones has fulfilled his promise so now I'm on to a new prodigy.
Just hours after I wrote about the great World Series of Poker Loni Harwood was having, the Staten Island native took her seat in the final $1500 No Limit Hold Em event of the summer.
Two days later, Harwood took down the bracelet and the $609,000 first prize, pushing her total winnings for the summer to roughly $875,000.

Thanks to her victory in this event, I was able to learn a little more about her through this WSOP interview. She is born and raised in Staten Island but after college moved to Miami (that explains the Heat hat). But I still don't know why Staten Island Advance hasn't done a story on her yet. Maybe this (plus my e-mails and tweets) will get their attention).

Here's Harwood's winner interview with the very lovely Lynn Gilmartin.



Maybe she was just nervous but girls from Staten Island usually talk a lot more than this.

Just for the record, Harwood did get very lucky to win this event. She was all in with 7 players left holding AK against her opponent's pocket aces. But she caught a queen and a jack on the flop and a 10 on a river. She didn't mention that particular hand in the interview but did acknowledge "a lot of rungood." But in this event and in the previous one when she finished 4th, I noticed excellent, aggressive play from her.

Very impressed with her play and happy to call her my homegirl.

Baddest Bitch in Poker

I've been following this year's World Series of Poker very closely and one player who caught my eye is 23-year-old Loni Harwood. Though she didn't win a bracelet she did make 2 Final Tables taking 6th in a $1,500 Pot Limit Omaha-8 for $39,000 and then a 4th in a $1,500 No Limit Hold Em for $210,000.
Most interesting to me is that Harwood is from Staten Island. And though she wears a Miami Heat hat all the time (though not the same one), she certainly plays like someone from Staten Island. She has pulled off several daring bluffs which would be impressive for any player, but are especially noteworthy because she is a woman, who for lack of a better term, plays like a man.
I have been trying to find out more info on Harwood, such as what neighborhood she's from and what high school she went to, but information on the internet is scarce, and the Staten Island Advance doesn't seem to be aware of her existence. I did e-mail the sports editor there to try to get an article written about her, so we will see if that happens.
If not, we'll just have to hope she wins the Main Event so we can get some positive coverage about our wonderful island.

Song of the Week

"Denise" - Randy and the Rainbows
This was one of the toughest decisions I've ever had. I chose this because I love the doo-wop sound and I think this song though great, is probably unknown to most Poopheads. Mama and Papa Poop say they have friends who named their daughter Denise because of this song.

What Do You Give Me For Rob Kardashian and George Zimmerman?

Kim Kardashian's brother and Trayvon Martin's killer sure have gained a lot of weight since we first met them. Now they look like fat-faced twins.
What do you give me for Rob Kardashian and George Zimmerman?

You Are What Your Record Says You Are

Bill Parcells famously said "you are what your record says you are" and I believe it to be true. The Dodgers are a last place team, and the Pirates are a first place team. Things could change, but for right now the Pirates are great and the Dodgers stink.
The Mets record by month so far this year:
April 10-15
May 12-15
June 11-15

That pretty much means the Mets are exactly what they seem to be, a bad team. A consistent team, but still bad.

A Few Comments About the Gay Marriage Ruling

1) Good, great, grand! I really don't see any reason why gay people shouldn't be allowed to get married.

2) I really don't see any reason why the government has any say in anyone's marriage. The government should get out of the marriage business but not recognizing anyone's unions and by not giving any kind of tax or benefit advantages to married people over single ones.

3) It's disgusting how President Obama is trying to act like he is on the winning side of this one. He ran for President twice, both times on anti-gay marriage platform. In 5 years he didn't make a single actual effort to get DOMA overturned. He did what he always does, took the easiest position at the outset and then took credit at the conclusion.

4) Hopefully this will be the day when all the closeted gay celebrities, athletes and whomever else comes out of the closet. If being gay is not a big deal, then stop making it a big deal. Stop making it a secret for years and only coming out when you get a magazine cover out of it. If you really want to help all the poor gay teenagers who are getting picked on and bullied in schools, just come out already. The more prominent gay people who show no embarrassment about being gay, the easier it will be for society to come to accept gay people.

Song of the Week

"Your Cheatin Heart" - Hank Williams

It's time for everybody's favorite part of the year, when I got back into the archives and find songs from 10, 20, 30, 40 and 50 years ago. But this time I'm taking it 60 years, because 1953, and especially 1954 were the beginnings of the modern era of music.

What Do You Say?

What do you call this woman who is best known for her roles as Stacey Carosi on Saved By the Bell and Carrie Heffernan on King of Queens?

The Universe Wished Me a Happy Birthday

When I was much younger I let my birthday be known to co-workers. They made a huge deal out of it, embarrassingly me terribly, on TV. It was then that I decided it would be better to keep my birthday under wraps and avoid the unwanted attention in the form of people making stupid comments about my age.
But that means no cake. And because last year we bought a Fudgie the Whale cake at home and I ended up eating 19 of the 22 servings (as per the box), I decided I didn't want a cake this year.
As I left for work that morning I reminded Mrs. Poop that I was serious, a cake was not necessary.
Mrs. Poop was ok with that, the Universe wasn't. At work I have a birthday twin. She is not as bashful as I am. Her desk was decorated with about 20 mylar balloons, she was wearing a birthday tiara, and cutting a Fudgie the Whale cake.
So she got the attention she wanted.
And I got the ice cream cake I wanted.

The Only Rule of Parenting

There are many different parenting methods and approaches that can lead to raising happy, healthy, successful, well-adjusted children. And there are many good parents who try hard and the kids still come out screwed up. There is no right way to do it, and even if there were, it wouldn't be a guarantee of success.
But I do have one ruling of parenting everyone must follow: love your kids more than you love yourself.
Put their needs ahead of your own.
That's it, that's the rule. Do that and you've got a good shot. Don't do that and you are pretty much Kim Kardashian and Kanye West naming your baby girl North because you think it's funny or because it will attract more tabloid attention.
I'm still holding out hope that this North West thing is a joke and they actually went with something more normal like Kaydeins. But for a girl who did a sex tape, got pregnant by a gay rapper and wore a tiny bikini while 8 months pregnant, nothing she does will surprise me.

3000 Words

Free Bill Posters!

The Suns center-court logo is perfectly symmetrical so that it appears to be right-side up when viewed from either side of the court.

Say what you want about New Jersey but we do have some beautiful sunsets.

Chemistry Lesson

Pardon the Interruption, PTI, is the best show on television. It's well-produced, they always pick the best topics of the day and discuss them in interesting ways. The format is great, the topics never get stale or boring. And they are not afraid to break format and talk about some ridiculous internet video, or a men's hairstyle. They talk about the same things you and your friends talk about it, in the same way.

Billy sent me this video, sort of an outtake as Mike and Tony were getting ready to do an interview with Brad Keselowski. It demonstrates the main reason PTI works, the amazing chemistry between Michael Wilbon and Tony Kornheiser.

Song of the Week

"I Go To Extremes" - Billy Joel
"I don't know why I go to extremes
Too high or too low, there ain't no in betweens"
Sound like someone you know?

Who Should Go?

Zack Wheeler will make his first major league start today which will force one pitcher from the rotation. Matt Harvey, Dillon Gee and Jon Niese have their spots wrapped up, so it comes down to Shaun Marcum vs. Jeremy Hefner.
By traditional measures you would think Marcum should be demoted to the bullpen or the minors because of his 5.43 ERA, his 0-8 record and his poor performance in his last start against the Cubs, when he could have been said to be fighting to keep his spot.
Meanwhile Hefner while nearly as bad in won-loss record at 1-6, his ERA is 3.96, and he gave up only 1 earned run in each of his last three starts. So clearly Hefner deserves to stay right? Wrong!
Here's why: Marcum's WAR is 1.4 (and he missed at least 4 early season starts), while Hefner is only 0.2, barely above replacement level.
I know some of you distrust WAR, but there are some very good reasons WAR is telling us what it is. There are 2 main things a pitcher has total control over, strikeouts and walks.
Strikeouts per 9 innings:
Marcum 7.74
Hefner 6.72


Walks per 9 innings:
Marcum 1.81
Hefner 2.76

So Marcum strikes out an extra batter per 9, and walks one fewer. It's those pesky things he can't control that are hurting him.

BABIP (batting average on balls in play)
Marcum .329
Hefner .271

So the Mets defense is turning batted balls into outs at a much higher rate for Hefner than they are with Marcum, which causes this:

FIP (Fielding-Independent Pitching)
Marcum 3.06
Hefner 4.69

So basically, because Marcum strikes out more batters, walks fewer and has been victimized by bad defense, his ERA should be close to 3, not five and a half.

Eventually you would expect those things to normalize which means Marcum is more promising for the last three months than Hefner. Especially if you consider that Marcum had four horrible starts to being the season after his injury, and has improved since.

Also throw in the fact that Hefner would likely be a more effective reliever, and Marcum would be more likely trade bait, it's almost a no-brainer to keep Marcum in the rotation and to demote Hefner to the bullpen.

The Mets Really Want David Wright to Be the Starting Third Baseman in the All-Star Game

David Wright is the best third baseman in the National League. It would be a real shame if he didn't get voted into the game as the starter, especially because this year's game is at CitiField.
The Mets have been actively trying to drum up support for Wright, and according to the New York Post they ever reached out to the website cougarlife.com. Apparently the cougars on that site voted David their hottest cub.
A low-level Mets marketing employee allegedly sent this e-mail to someone at cougarlife:

"Wondering if you would be able to blog/post a story asking your users (who apparently admire David and would love seeing him play in the All-Star Game) to go to the below link to vote David and #VoteWrightNow as he needs their help."

The Mets however decided teaming up with the Cougars wasn't in the best interest of the franchise but they did acknowledge a little harmless flirting.
David is engaged to model Molly Beers, clearly no relation to Pa Beers.

Song of the Week

"Keep on Pushing" - The Impressions
I heard this song in a LeBron commercial and couldn't get it out my head.
That great falsetto is the voice of Curtis Mayfield, whom I believe is in the back of this picture.

Michael Douglas Recants, Says Catherine Zeta-Jones's Pussy Didn't Cause His Cancer

Michael Douglas caused a shitstorm around the world, and most likely in his own bedroom when he said, of his throat cancer "this particular cancer is caused by something called HPV, which actually comes about from cunnilingus."
Douglas was forced, presumably by his wife, Catherine Zeta-Jones to retract that statement. Now he says he meant that other people get throat cancer this way. His was caused by something completely different.
Except that's not what the statistics say. According to the CDC, Each year in the U.S., HPV is thought to cause an estimated

2,100 vulvar cancers,
500 vaginal cancers,
600 penile cancers,
2,800 anal cancers in women,
1,500 anal cancers in men,
1,700 oropharyngeal cancers in women,*
6,700 oropharyngeal cancers in men.*

*Note: Other factors, notably tobacco and alcohol use, may also play a role with HPV to cause these cancers.

So even the CDC says thousands of men get exactly this type of cancer from HPV every year.



You may remember that Farrah Fawcett died of anal cancer, likely from HPV, almost assuredly from the diseased cock of Ryan O'Neal.

The lesson as always kids: be careful out there.

A Gr-ate Day

Today is an amazing day, two incredibly beautiful women who share my love, also share a first name, a birthday and a cup size.
Happy birthday to Mrs. Poop and Kate Upton.



And by the way, this is not a nipslip. It's not even an areola slip. It got close, but I really think it's irresponsible of the tabloids to use that term for a false alarm/near miss. If the cat daddy video didn't do it, there's no way some frolicking on the beach will.

What Do You Give Me For? Magic Johnson's Gay Son, EJ and Roz from Monster's University

What do you give me for Magic Johnson's Gay Son, EJ and Roz from Monster's University?

Should the Mets Call Up Zack Wheeler?

Given the incredible success of Matt Harvey, and the complete lack of success of every other player the Mets have called up from the minor leagues in the past 5 years, Mets fans are dying for Zack Wheeler, the player acquired for Carlos Beltran, to come up and dominate like Matt Harvey is doing.
But they should wait. Just a couple more months. Three reasons why the Mets should wait to bring him up.



1) Performance
Wheeler is not dominating in the minor leagues. He's 4-1 with a 3.86 ERA in 58 1/3 innings. His FIP is even higher meaning he's benefiting slightly from good defense. He's striking out 9.1 batters per 9 innings which is excellent. He's allowing 1.23 homers per 9 innings which is horrible. But the smaller ballparks and thinner air of the Pacific Coast League are certainly contributing to that and he would surely find CitiField to be a friendlier place to pitch. But his walk rate of 3.76/9 innings is also too high and that has been consistently high his entire minor league career no matter where he's pitched. It's pretty likely he will always be that way, but the point is, he is not dominating the minor leagues to the point where an immediate call-up is necessary.
2) Reality
The Mets stink. There is no reason to rush a player to the major leagues in the middle of another disastrously bad season. No reason to subject him to the bad defense and anemic offense that is holding Matt Harvey's win total at 5, despite the excellent season he is having.

Since Wheeler can't help the Mets win (enough), and he's not blowing away the competition in the minors, the Mets should wait to bring him up.

Wait until when?

July 6th.

3) Money
If the Mets bring up Zack Wheeler now, after his second full season in the majors (2015) he would likely be eligible for arbitration under a rule called "Super-2." Most players aren't arbitration eligible until after their third full season, except for Super-2s. How do you become a Super-2? By being in the top 22% of players in your class, but you must also have at last 86 days of service, which he couldn't get if he's called up on July 6th.

I know some of you are turning up your noses at my suggestion that the Mets use the tactics favored by small-market teams like the Rays and the A's, when they play in the largest market in the country.

Look at it this way, if the Mets bring him up in the next 30 days, they will likely have to pay him a much higher salary in 2016 than they would if they keep him down. So they would be trading whatever performance he's going to deliver in 5 or 6 starts in the middle of this dreadful season for millions of dollars down the line, if he has the career we hope he will.

If you would still call him up now, you are thinking with your heart and not your head. And that type of thinking dug the hole the Mets are still trying to escape from.

I think we can wait one more month to get Zack Wheeler and Matt Harvey back together at CitiField

Song of the Week

"Turn on the Lights" - Future
You may not like this song but at least the cat has a different style, which I find interesting.

Good Boychick Wins the Spelling Bee

I don't think Arvind Mahankali is Jewish. I doubt he's ever been to a kosher deli. But thanks to his knowledge of traditional Jewish cuisine, Arvind is the 2013 Scripps National Spelling Bee Champion.



"May I have the language of origin please?
German-derived Yiddish"

I don't know why the audience found that so funny. But did you notice the example sentence? "Max hoped to find at least one more knaidel in his soup bowl but all he discovered was his missing lower denture." Who is the smartass who writes these things?



Story suggested by Master Bates

What Do You Give Me For? J.C. Penney Teapot and Hitler

What do you give me for J.C. Penney Teapot and Hitler?
Before you dismiss this as the insane rantings of an angry Jew, take a good look. The teapot was featured on a billboard and drivers kept stopping to take pictures of it because it does bear some resemblance to Hitler. It's a little abstract but the handle is the hair. The knob on the lid is the mustache. The spout is the Hitler salute. It may not be a 10 but it's closer than you think.

Song of the Week

"What's My Name" - Snoop Doggy Dogg
"Nine-trizzy's the yizzy
for me to fuck up shit."
Can't believe this song is 20 years old already. This whole era of "Nuthin But a G Thang" and "Dre Day" plus this song are what got me interested in rap music as a teenager.

A Misplaced Space

I don't really need to write too much about this one. The person who writes the scroll from MLB Network pressed the space bar at the wrong time and instead of "players hitting" it displayed "player shitting." And it ran during "Bad News Bears Breaking Training."