I Guess We Weren't The Only Ones

As troublesome high school Spanish students, Reissberg, myself and others used to translate people's names from Spanish to English and vice versa.
We loved the 49ers dynamic passing duo, Esteban Joven a Jerry Arroz (Steve Young to Jerry Rice).
We delighted at soccer player Charles Blackmouth (Carlos Bocanegra).
And our favorite player ever was Seattle Mariners pitcher Joe Breadandwater (Jose Paniagua).
The tradition continues to this day as we lamented the season-ending injury to Vikings quarterback Teddy Puenteagua (Teddy Bridgewater).
Evidently, we are not alone, as another of our translations, this one for Cleveland Indians closer Jose Mesa, is actually listed as his nickname on his baseball reference page, and his Wikipedia entry.

Why the Long Face? You Won

Congratulations to Reissberg on his victory in this year's Tournament Challenge group. His 1440 points put him in the top 2.6% nationally, tied for 166,057th place. He was one of 10 (nearly half our group) to pick the champion correctly. He narrowly edged out Dylan, whose brother Evan would have won if Kansas had pulled off the upset.
In third place is some random entry followed by Mrs. Poop in 4th.
Mrs. Poop is a force in this contest, winning in 2011 & 2009.
2008 was another heart-breaking year for poor Evan, who lost to his father when Kansas (those bastards) pulled off a miracle against Memphis.
In 2007, Michael was the champion. The once great Michael has fallen to embarrassing levels, finished 20th out of 21 this year.
I did not keep accurate records so I don't know who won in 2010. But from now on I will post the list so we can look back at past performance.

The Whole Crew

Two excellent pictures of the Staten Island crew taken at JLeary's wedding.

From left: Nails, The Poop, The Concierge, JLeary, TON, Focks, TallSkott, Reissberg




Photos courtesy of Special K

The Exploratory Committee To Elect Reissberg To Congress

With the troubles of Vito Fossella likely to cost him his career, Reissberg has asked me to gather some polling data to find out how such a run for Congress would be received.

Your Name Here

When I started this blog more than two years ago I never imagined it would grow into the cultural force it has become. I also underestimated how popular this blog would be with Google Searchers.

At beginning, I used a lot of people's real names when talking about them on this blog. When I started getting e-mails from people looking to track down someone I decided to go with nicknames instead of real names for Poopheads. And in most cases I retroactively searched the Poop and made the adjustments.

In one case I did not.

Two years ago on this day I wished Reissberg a happy birthday. He turns 29 today, by the way.

In that post instead of "Reissberg's dad" I used his real name. Almost two years later an old friend of Reissberg's dad googled him and came across the Poop. When he contacted him he asked why when his son was born did he say to the doctor "give me my baby, asshole?"

This made an awkward moment for Reissberg who was confronted by his parents. He eventually explained how we "exaggerated" his father's rudeness and how we end every sentence said by Reissberg's dad with an "asshole," including the Concierge's "I'm enjoying my danish, asshole" at the brunch the morning after Reissberg's wedding.

Anyway, Reissberg's dad laughed off the whole incident but will definitely call me an asshole next time I see him.

Reissberg Reflects

So Reissberg finished the New York City Marathon. And unlike Katie Holmes, he was sweaty, and he was wearing a bra.
And the next day instead of dressing up and walking the red carpet in high heels, Reiss instead got a massage. Sounds like a question for "Which is Gayer?"

I offered Reissberg the floor to talk about his marathon experience and this is what he had to say:

"Just an unforgettable experience, having thousands of people cheer for you on the street. I tried acknowledging every single person with a wave or a fist pump or something -- the first half of the race. By the end I could barely muster the energy to lift an arm.
Nothing can prepare you, no matter how well you trained, for the pain of the last few miles. Basically, my leg muscles just broke, and then my abs started to feel strained for some reason. Somehow, though, looking back after a week or so, all I remember is the thrill of crossing the finish line, and not the pain. Amazing that I finished it, and helped sick kids in the process.

Pretty much recovered now except my right knee hurts when I try to run.

Would I do another one? I wouldn't rule it out, but not next year. The pain is too much to willingly endure again, and it's too much of a time commitment, which isn't fair to Mrs. Reissberg, and time is tight as it is. Nothing could ever duplicate the experience of my first time, but I'd consider doing it again if there was something new -- like a different city, or different people to run with. So if any of you Poopheads want to try to run a marathon some day, I'd gladly train with you."

He Did It!

Our boy Reissberg finished the New York City Marathon in a very impressive 3 hours 47 minutes and 55 seconds. Out of 39,000 runners he finished in 7922nd place. His pace was just under 9 minutes per mile, which over 26 miles is really incredible.
And more importantly he raised $4834.40 (who gave 40 cents?) for charity. You can still donate.

Finishing just 7 seconds ahead of Reissberg was Hans Schmid of California. As impressed as I am with Reissberg, I'd be more impressed if he can do it again in 39 years, when he is Mr. Schmid's age (67). Note: Reissberg is listed as 29 but he is still 28 for 6 more weeks.

Also finishing a few seconds ahead of Reissberg was a woman named Jessica Miller. Life's little coincidences. And Stacey Riccio a 33 year-old woman from Staten Island.

And finishing nearly 2 hours behind Reissberg coming in at 5 hours 29 minutes and 58 seconds was Katie Holmes. Yes, that Katie Holmes.

Grieving Mets Fans

Run Reissberg Run

In one month, Reissberg will be running 26.2 miles, urinating and defacating on himself all for charity. I've posted about this before but I just wanted to remind you all to donate to Reissberg's cause.

Reissberg Reaction

Reissberg's mother said "I can't believe the little boy who used to run around my house just had a baby."

Reissberg's father said "I can't believe that asshole just had a baby."

TON and Special K's Wedding

TON and Special K are now Mr. and Mrs. TON.
It was a nice, quick ceremony full of the requisite retarded/uncomfortable faces by TON.
A kind old judge led them through the paces they hit all the high notes "sickness and health, for richer for poorer," "with this ring I thee wed," and "you may kiss the pride," so TON did and then they were pronounced Mr. and Mrs. TON.





Then we went inside for some drinks and hors d'oeuvres. The best one was a shrimp wrapped in bacon, but it was a little messy. JLeary had a piece of bacon hanging out of his mouth, I had to go in the corner to eat one, but they were delicious. And the first time they came around four of us got them from the waitress and I was the only one to offer it to my wife. Not sure I would have if she weren't pregnant, but she declined. She knows how much I love food wrapped in bacon.

A little while later it was time for the best man's speech. Now, because I know TON from high school, but we also went to college together, I knew pretty much everyone.

It was nice to see good old BC again, RoachSU made it in for the wedding and Briles (formerly known as the Commish) was the 5th person from our floor freshman year at the wedding. I also got to see VinJuiceTang again. And the best part of that was that in a conversation with Vin earlier in the week I said he was going to be mistaken by everyone as a relative of the bride. Then when I was talking to him, someone came up to him and asked "are you related to the bride?"

And another SU alum, who made the trip in from Denmark was the best man P-O'T. He seemed kind of nervous but he was really funny and encapsulated TON and Kelly pretty well. Basically they like do crazy shit like skydiving, ice climbing and getting eaten by animals in Africa together.




One of the cooler parts of the wedding was when the band took a brief intermission and when they came back it was TON's dad on the keyboard along with his band he's been playing with for 40 years. Between the four band members they have ten kids, 6 of them have gotten married, and they've played a few songs and each wedding. They started off with "Pretty Woman" by Roy Orbison, then went to "Gimme Some Lovin" by the Spencer Davis Group and finished with the all-time crowd pleaser, "Sweet Caroline" by Neil Diamond.



TON even tried dancing, something he does reluctantly, and not very well.



But TON's cousins got the dancing genes in the family. When they band played "Play That Funky Music" two of them started getting down on the dance floor, ending with one of them taking off his shirt. Apparently this is a wedding tradition for him.



The second coolest thing at this wedding was one of those little photobooths where you cram in there and the flash goes off and you get a nice strip of 6 pictures of you and your wife/girlfriend making funny faces at each other.

In this case you took 6 photos cut the strip down the middle put three in album for TON & Special K and kept the other three for yourself. Mrs. Poop and I did this twice, we got some nice photos including one with the Concierge's hand behind me.

Focks, TallSkott and I tried to cram into the booth with varying degrees of success. When you have a head as bag as TallSkott's it takes up a lot of room.

But that paled in comparison to the fact that instead of wedding cake, the served cupcakes. They were so delicious I must have had about four...teen of them man.

At first I planned to have two, then RoachSU and I spotted a couple lonely ones, than TallSkott offered me one that was just sitting on our table, and then the Conciergette yelled at me. But they were freakin delicious.





Here's the crew from left to right: Brother of the Bride, TallSkott, Reissberg, TON (how did the groom get sent to the back of this picture?), The Concierge, JLeary, The Poop, Focks and VinJuiceTang.



And the ladies in our lives: Zorf, The Conciergette aka TallJulie, Mrs. TallSkott, MayMay, Special K (the bride), Mrs. Reissberg, Mrs. Poop, Mrs. Nails and Bauer's Mom aka Short Julie.

Reissberg is a Good Person

The following is a message from Reissberg:

"I am training to run the 2007 NYC marathon. In order to try to gain guaranteed entry into the race and to support a cause that is very important to me and my family, I have joined Fred's Team, an organization run by Memorial Sloan Kettering Cancer Center, to raise money for cancer research (in honor of Fred Lebow, the founder of the NYC Marathon, who died of cancer). I have pledged to raise a minimum of $2500 and am hoping to gain one of the limited guaranteed spots in the race for members of the team. (If worst comes to worst and I do not get into the marathon, I will have (hopefully) raised a lot of money for a good cause and I will run the DC marathon as an alternative, which is the week earlier. So either way this is a win-win. You get to contribute money to a good cause, and I get to be in excruciating pain.)
Thank you for your support."

This is the link to Reissberg's fundraising page. There are a lot of affluent Poopheads reading this blog, I hope you will join in and help the long-faced Jew reach his goals, for a good cause. And so his father doesn't yell at him, asshole.

The marathon is months away so I'll post about this again during the summer and right before the race I'm sure.

I Am Not a Mush

When Penn roared back against Texas ATM to take a 39-37 lead after they had been trailing by 13, I sent a cordial text message to Reissberg:
"What a comeback! I picked texas atm to win two games tho. Good luck."

He replied:
"U fuckin jinx."

Texas ATM won the game.

Did I mush the Quakers? Or did Reissberg's rudeness and resulting bad karma cost his team?

Is Jim Nantz Gay?

This was a hot topic of discussion at Nailsfest.
I think Jim Nantz is gay and that it is well known within that community.
Reissberg claims he heard the same thing independently of me.
Juice was shocked when he heard this but quickly came around and started calling him "Jim Nantz-y Boy."
Nantz is married with a daughter but he once said "I'm blessed to have great friends, and there are a lot of men in my life who've been more than just friends."
Outsports.com keeps track of homoerotic comments made by Nantz' partner Phil Simms.
I wish we could get his reaction to the Snickers commercial.

Last Year on the Poop

I showed off the newest addition to my jersey collection.

I brought up an old mistake Vin Juice will never live down.

Carrie Underwood made her first appearance on the Poop.

And of course, it's December 29th, the birthday of Reissberg.

I really like what I said about it last year so I'll just update the text:

The straggler in the group, Jeremy, is finally turning 28 today.
He has spent the last 16 years serving good-naturedly as the butt of jokes from Sobel, Leary and me.
He has run into light poles, thrown house parties, been slapped and even got married.
You can see the size of a man's face, but not the size of a man's heart.
So please join me in celebrating this day 28 years ago when the doctor said to Reissberg's dad, "Congratulations, its a boy."
And he responded "give me my baby, asshole."

The Curse of the Concierge -- Broken

The Mets' Game 6 victory broke the Curse of the Concierge.

Like Dante, I wasn't even supposed to be here today. I got a text from Nails and an e-mail from Reissberg at around 1 saying "Jay Leary is angry, Matt Focks doesn't have a clean blazer, we have an extra ticket, can you go to the game?"

I was conflicted but I decided to go. I took a nap, bought a sandwich from Subway (3-0 when buying a Subway sandwich before the game, 0-1 when not), got to Shea by 5:30, parked in the main lot and went to sleep.

Woke up at 7 to meet Reissberg. But where were Nails and The Concierge? They had train problems and were delayed by 30 minutes. That meant 3 more beers for each of them. The Concierge was out of control screaming.

After Reyes homered, the Concierge knocked a beer out of Nails' hands. The beer cup landed flat, but the beer splashed everywhere.

Things continued at this level of hyperactivity until the 7th inning. I did something I never do, and it set off a chain reaction of events. When Mota was coming in to face Duncan I dashed to the bathroom. I got in and out of the pisser quickly and was in the aisle right when the Mets turned 2. The Concierge was so pumped up he sprinted up the stairs and into our row. For some reason, he decided to run on the seats of the chairs of the row in front of us. He took a bad step on the end of a chair, and it collapsed. His leg was trapped. About five people tried to yank him up but he curled into a little ball. I thought he was really hurt, but he emerged, holding his shoe in one hand.

When we got back to our seats we noticed there was considerable bruisin' and swellin'. The Concierge was so not gellin'. Nails went to get him ice, but was refused by the ice nazis who wanted to make him pay for the cup.

At some point during all this, The Concierge also broke his chair.

When Lo Duca singled in the bottom of the inning I think his pain went away, because we all went nuts. We spent the last two innings on pins and needles until Wagner got the last out. We were huddled together hoping we could somehow help Wagner not suck so much. The crowd on the way out was awesome. People were hugging and high fiving and honking their horns. A great spectacle.

I was proud to be there.

What I Learned in Vegas

Most of what happens in Vegas stays in Vegas. But because I try to learn from my mistakes, and the mistakes of my friends (life is too short to make all the good mistakes yourself) I thought this information would prove useful.

1) Be careful when girls are dancing on the bar. If you lean in real close (like Greenspan did) it will look to her as if you are trying to see what kind of panties she is wearing. She will then grab your head and scream at you, and her bartender friend will do the same.

2) Mrs. Freedo loves to read the Poop. When we ran into the Freeds at the Hard Rock, she at first had no idea why I was giving her a kiss hello. When Freedo subsequently referred to me as Paul, she warmed up, gave me a big hug and declared herself to be a daily reader.

3) Mike/Nails has exacting standards for craps shooters. Though my Friday night roll at the Hard Rock made everyone a considerable amount of money (two points, made the hardway -- the second resulted in $81 for Fox and $90 for Reiss) and the fact that 6 members of our group were rocking the table, he classified my turn with the dice as "excellent," falling one point short of "legendary."

4) Greenspan's ADHD is contagious, and Reissberg caught it. Jeremy's impatience manifested itself towards the craps dealers ("you forgot to pay me on my hardway"), the cocktail waitresses ("where is she with my drink?") and the Arizona Cardinals ("let's go play blackjack.") In the final circumstance, he was so addled while waiting for the game to end, I had to beg him to sit still until the clock read 0:00. He even admitted the problem "I want to do every thing at every moment."

5) Zach Morris scored a 1502 on his SAT. Not 1509.

6) Self-hating Jews are better or luckier gamblers than those with pride in Israel.

7) Don't leave the sportsbook until the game is over. I did a couple of things wrong, that aren't quite rules to live by yet. First of all, I bet against my alma mater Syracuse. Secondly, I bet it the night before the game so when Iowa's starting QB went down, I didn't get the benefit of the line changing 3 points, not that it mattered. Turns out Iowa's backup is worse than Perry Patterson and he threw 4 INTs. Thing is, Iowa was still winning with the ball and less than 2 minutes to play. I said to an Iowa fan "Congratulations, you just beat the worst team in the nation by 3 points." But they hadn't. SU got the ball back, tied it, sent it to OT, and then double OT. It was there that the Orange couldn't get the ball into endzone on 8 plays from inside the 5-yard line and lost by 7. But I didn't find any of that out until much later.
For the curious I split my college games, losing SU and Michigan winning Ohio State and Cal.

8) Take the redeye home...the day before everyone else leaves, not the day after. The redeye is a great way to sleep through a flight, and not lose a day to travel/sleep. I seemed to be the only one who was not dead tired. But don't hang out in the casino all day waiting for your flight. You are just asking to lose money.

9) Do not spill coffee on the roulette table. Ton tried this. It resulted in several very angry dealers who had to clean the felt, and towel off each chip individually. The funniest part was, not a drop got on Ton, but the poor woman at the table got coffee on her pants, and on all her chips.

10) When you see TallSkott making the Triple Threat, and Sobel wearing his Kool-Aid smile, you know they are having a good time.

11) If someone you know gets up from the poker table at 4am and says he's going to meet a friend, he's going to a strip club to see a girl he saw last night. If you see him the next morning and he says he just had breakfast with a friend, he didn't get laid.

12) It's usually gay when two guys share food, but not always. Jerry and Ray split a 40 ribeye, and it looked pretty good.

13) 9 Steakhouse in the best restaurant in the world. So many beautiful women. So many beautiful women with so many guys who don't look like they deserve them. At one table, in the middle of their meal, two gorgeous black women sat down next to two fat white dudes. Paid escorts?

14) Jerry has never seen those Keith Hernandez and Walt Frazier commercials.

15) Simpler is better when it comes to marketing. We stayed at THE Hotel. We opened THE door with THE Key. We shopped at THE Store. What a catchy gimmick. I even bought THE Shirt and THE hat.




16) If you read in the newspaper that a strip club was closed down for serving alcohol despite the suspension of its liquor licence, you can bet The Concierge was there drinking the night before.

17) An unlucky weekend at the tables can lead a man to change his life. Dylan has given up gambling, smoking, drinking, eating, cursing and hating Reiss.

18) Don't antagonize your friends. My luck took a serious turn for the worse when I showed up to watch the Giants-Colts game in a Dwight Freeney jersey. In fact, the number 93 on my jersey would haunt me later when I had aces cracked by 9-3.

And the Verdict is In

Got great reactions to the Bachelor Party Preview, but since none of you chose to use the comments section I thought I would share your thoughts here:

Reissberg: "Funny stuff. I particularly enjoyed Sobel and Matt's weaknesses although I dispute that Dylan's belief that I am a self-hating Jew is a strength."

Jay Leary: "whats up--that was very good. i dont know if you knew--but may-may and i got engaged."

PudgyScat: "Dude, very good!!! I was laughing out loud alot. Awesome"

Dylan: "Dude, this is great. Nice work."

Jay Sobel: "you should have used this picture instead."




Juice: "Unreal dude...still laughing my arse off.....great work...VEGAS BAAAAAABY!!!!
Ssssssssssssssssssick!"

Scott's Bachelor Party Preview

The TallSkott Bachelor Party promises to an event for the ages. We'll be previewing and of course reviewing the action (what we can relate safely). To start, let's introduce the cast of characters.


Name: Scott
Known Aliases: The Groom, TallSkott, FatScat, ObeseScott
Height: 6'5"
Weight: 290 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: New York Yankees
Favorite NFL team: New England Patriots, Indianapolis Colts, Seattle Seahawks, Pittsburgh Steelers
Favorite college football team: Syracuse Orange, Michigan Wolverines
Marital Status: That's why we're here
Affiliation to Scott: Self
Strengths: Height, willing to do anything for a laugh, eats like a normal person
Weaknesses: Impatient gambler, weak drinker, sharp pointer finger


Name: Matthew
Known Aliases: The Organizer, Focks, Dice
Height: 5' 8"
Weight: 155 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: New York Giants
Favorite college football team: Michigan Wolverines
Marital status: Single
Affiliation to Scott: Friends since first day of high school/roommate for 4 years
Strengths: great dice roller, smells nice
Weaknesses: designer wardrobe, quiet


Name: Jason S.
Known Aliases: Jay, Shine
Height: 5' 7"
Weight: 180 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: Miami Dolphins
Favorite college football team: Miami Hurricanes
Marital status: Single, but wants to live by "The Principle"
Affiliation to Scott: Met Scott on a field trip to the Bronx Zoo
Strengths: can talk for hours about nothing, great organizer, brother of Michael, has a way with strippers
Weaknesses: thinks he has none, sweats profusely, sometimes talks too much, arguing with Paul


Name: Michael S.
Known Aliases: Nails
Height: 5'7"
Weight: 190 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: Miami Dolphins
Favorite college football team: Penn State Nittany Lions
Marital status: married
Affiliation to Scott: Grew up on Shaolin
Strengths: Great drinker, all-around nice guy
Weaknesses: brother of Jay Sobel, temper


Name: Justin G.
Known Aliases: Juice
Height: 6' 2 1/2"
Weight: 190 lbs.
Favorite Baseball team: Los Angeles Dodgers
Favorite NFL team: New York Jets
Favorite college football team: Rutgers University
Marital status: Single as a mutha
Affiliation to Scott: His personal trainer
Strengths: Irrepressible optimism, fun to watch
Weaknesses: Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder


Name: Justin L.
Known Aliases: Ton, Big Ton, JusTON
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 200 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: Mets (for the 1.6 games per year that I watch)
Favorite NFL team: Giants (actually a fan)
Favorite college football team: Cuse (by default since I went there)
Marital status: Recently engaged
Affiliation to Scott: I believe I met him freshman yr of H.S., and over the years we've bonded because 1-Whether the rest of you know it or not, all tall guys like each other. 2-Similar tastes in quality cinema...such as Scary Movie 2. We were also roomies for a year in Jersey City, where I gave him lessons on canned vegetables, and The George Foreman Grill.
Strengths: Funny, laid-back, self-deprecating
Weaknesses: very hairy, not much of a sports fan, shares every detail when telling a story


Name: Jeremy
Known Aliases: Richard Collins, Reissberg, Face
Height: 5' 8"
Weight: 150 lbs.
Favorite Baseball Team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: New York Giants
Favorite college football team: Penn Quakers
Marital Status: Married
Affiliation to Scott: Friend since high school
Strengths: likeable and agreeable
Weaknesses: Sometimes says stupid things, s-s-s-s-s-stutter


Name: Jason L.
Known Aliases: Jay
Height: 5'9"
Weight: 145 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: New York Giants
Favorite college football team: Penn State
Marital status: Engaged
Affiliation to Scott: High school friend
Strengths: speed, toughness
Weaknesses: temper


Name: Paul A.
Known Aliases: The Poop, Diddy, Loose Cannon
Height: 6' 2"
Weight: 190 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: Washington Redskins
Favorite college football team: Syracuse Orange
Marital Status: Married
Affiliation to Scott: Known since high school
Strengths: Knowledge of grammar and math, this blog
Weaknesses: Streaky gambler (can light the gas or mush the whole casino), obnoxious, thinks he knows everything, arguing with Jay

Name: Chris
Known Aliases: "C", Chicken Francese
Height: 5' 9"
Weight: 200 lbs.
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: Buffalo Bills
Favorite college football team: If I had to pick one, Syracuse
Marital Status: Single
Affiliation to Scott: Pace University friend
Strengths: Born and raised in Brooklyn, good salesman, can bench 300 pounds, once owned a Camaro
Weaknesses: Now lives on Staten Island, Buffalo Bills fan, actual height it 5'7"


Name: Ray
Known Aliases: Chinese Ray, "Rayz"
Height: 5'8"
Weight: 175 lbs
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: New York Giants
Favorite college football team: The "U"
Marital status: Single as can be
Affiliation to Scott: College mate
Strengths: Been to Vegas many times, definitely not a c-ck block, been to most baseball stadiums in the US, looks like Hideki Matsui
Weaknesses: Not a good gambler, can spend hundreds at strip club


Name: Paul D
Height: 5' 8"
Weight: 185 lbs
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: Oakland Raiders
Favorite college football team: Notre Dame Fighting Irish
Marital status: Single
Affiliation to Scott: Friend
Strengths: Played in a WSOP event in 2005, Very knowledgeable about sports, Fantasy football guru, Can drink like a fish
Weaknesses: Doesn't always double down with 11

Name: Harry
Height: 5' 8"
Weight: 198
Favorite baseball team: New York Mets
Favorite NFL team: New York Jets
Favorite college football team: Notre Dame Fighting Irish
Marital status: Single
Affiliation to Scott: Friend
Strenghts: Great poker player, cashed in 2005 WSOP event, good drinker
Weaknesses: Brazilian women, always late


Name:Dylan
Height: 5'9"
Weight: 180 lbs
Favorite baseball team: New York Yankees
Favorite NFL team: Buffalo Bills
Favorite college football team: Cornell
Marital status: Married
Affiliation to Scott: Met through spouses
Strengths: Excellent blackjack player, holds alcohol well, good debater, good golfer, thinks Reissberg is a self-hating Jew
Weaknesses: Not very sports knowledgeable, Republican

World Cup Weekend

Should be an interesting weekend of World Cup games, now that the action has picked up somewhat, and we're on to 3 and 4 games per day, instead of 2.
So far it's been a disappointing tournament for two reasons.
First the U.S. got smoked. The Poop's soccer expert Reissberg says the team was overrated coming in and doesn't have the talent to match the top European sides. He said the great run in 2002 was the product of a favorable draw. Doesn't mean they were one of the top 8 teams just because they made the quarters. Those same dynamics are unquestionably working against them this time as they are in a very tough group.
The U.S. can still advance with a win over Italy tomorrow at 3pm and a win over Ghana on Thursday. If that happens Italy would have to beat Czech.
So, can the U.S. beat Italy? The first thing to consider is do they have the talent? The answer is probably Italy is a little more talented and a lot more experienced. But I do feel the U.S. can win and here's how: They have to play like they're possessed. They have to use the ass-kicking and the subsequent criticism as fuel for the fire.

The second reason I'm not into the World Cup is because my pre-tournament pick, France, and Brazil played boring opening matches. I watched them both back to back on Tuesday and only one goal was scored. I did enjoy Zinedine Zidane for France. He is a master. You can tell how the game just sort of slows down for him. Brazil knew they were going to win and didn't seem properly motivated.

The teams will play again on Sunday as two-thirds of ABC's tripleheader starting at 9am. Hopefully these matches will provide more excitement.