Friday, October 28, 2011

Nothing to Apologize For

Rob Gronkowski has nothing to be sorry about. The Patriots tight end was pictured with porn star BiBi Jones. She was wearing his jersey, he was not.



This created quite a fitrestorm and eventually led to Gronk apologizing to Robert Kraft. Apparently, they think he sullied the Patriots image by allowing a porn star to wear the precious jersey.

The only good part of this fiasco is that the world was introduced to BiBi Jones, who is apparently a major groupie. She says she did not fuck Gronkowski, but she did sleep with Phoenix Coyotes player Paul Bissonette and Dan Uggla (that should get him into the Hall of Fame). She also claims she was used as a recruiting tool for an agent. He took her to spring training in Arizona in 2010 and would take her out to bars at night.

"You know, baseball players would come and I’d introduce myself. And then I got to hook up with baseball players and have fun. It was like a dream come true because I love athletes and baseball’s my favorite sport."

Jones claimed that she slept with "more than 10" players.

But Jones says she didn't fuck Gronkowski even though she wanted to.

Gronkowski should feel remorse about that.

porn star Bibi jones also seems to like the Yankees


Wednesday, October 26, 2011

The NFL is Poop - Week 7

It's Tebow Time
The debate over Tim Tebow is reaching a boiling point with each side gaining more ammunition based on his performance in the Broncos 18-15 over the Miami Dolphins. The Tebow supporters were heartened by him pulling victory from the jaws of defeat, the first ever comeback of more than 14 points in less than 3 minutes. "He's a winner," they say.
The Tebow detractors point to his performance in the first 55 minutes when he was absolutely dreadful, 4 for 14 for 40 yards. "He'll never have a comeback like that against a real team."
I'm firmly in the second camp, with one exception. I really, really, really, really like Tim Tebow. I think he is a hell of a guy and I love him as a player. But not as a quarterback. I do think there is a large psychological component to the position. I think it does take a special kind of person to make the big play when the game is on the line.
Unfortunately, I also think throwing arm and accuracy are way more important traits. And I don't believe he has them, or can learn them.



Old-Fashioned Ass-Whupping
The Saints put a hurt on the Colts, the worst beating in the history of the modern NFL. 62 points tied a post-merger record, as did the 55-point margin of victory. They scored every single time they had the ball until the very last drive, 5 touchdowns, 2 field goals, then three more touchdowns, the last of which came on an interception return. Just a complete and total domination.

How Much Does a Quarterback Really Matter?
Last year the Colts were 10-6 and made the playoffs. This year they are 0-7. The biggest difference. Peyton Manning is not playing.

How Much Does a Quarterback Really Matter? II
The Raiders were 4-2 with the good, not great, Jason Campbell running the team. He got hurt and Kyle Boller and Carson Palmer combined to throw 6 interceptions in a 28-0 loss to the Chiefs, who were averaging 30 points per game entering this game.

Suck for Luck
Dolphins fans didn't even seem too upset by their historic collapse against the Broncos. They are hoping the Fins can "Suck for Luck" and get the first draft pick, which will allow them to take Stanford quarterback Andrew Luck. Problem is, they may not be the only winless team tanking. The Colts and Rams are equally atrocious, but neither of those two teams is as desperate for a QB as Miami. The Rams have Bradford, and unless Manning is too hurt to ever play again, the Colts will give him a few more years, since they paid him so much money. It'll be interesting to see if the Dolphins blatantly start dumping games in order to draft him.

I Have Seen the Light
I wasn't convinced before the season started, but now I am sure, Cam Newton is going to be a big star in this league for a very long time. He is not the White Tim Tebow or the Sane Vince Young. He's more like a better Daunte Culpepper. He is a great running quarterback as shown on a ridiculous run he had early in the first quarter against the Redskins, while evading about 5 tacklers. But Newton doesn't run at the first sign of trouble, he doesn't need to, he's a great passer. He's not in the Brady, Brees, Rodgers class of guy who throw the ball to open spots with perfect accuracy to let their receivers catch it, but he's close. He nailed so many perfect throws, especially to Steve Smith. It was very impressive to watch.



A Brief Rant About the Redskins
All the hope I had after the 3-1 start is gone. The offense stinks and now it's being run by John Beck who is not as good as Rex Grossman, but for some reason the Shanahans like him better. Now Chris Cooley and Tim Hightower are out for the season and Santana Moss is out until December. The offense looks even worse. And the defense which had been great couldn't tackle Cam Newton or defend Steve Smith.

If the Super Bowl Were Played Today
Green Bay Packers 31 New England Patriots 14

The Packers got a scare from Christian Ponder but held on. The Patriots will solidify their spot if they can beat the Steelers this week.

Song of the Week

"Real Love remix" - Mary J Blige featuring Notorious B.I.G.
One of the funniest moments in my life occurred during this song. We're at a crowded bar and TON's friend KayTee points his finger straight up in the air. He gives us just enough time to look around and act confused because we have no idea what he is pointing at. Then we hear "Look up in the sky..." Genius



Note: That awesome beat is a sample from Betty Wright's "Clean Up Woman"

Tuesday, October 25, 2011

Stand Up for Gary Carter

25 years ago today Gary Carter stepped to the plate with no one on, two men out and his team trailing by 2 runs.
Carter singled to center field to start the most amazing rally in the history of baseball (stakes included).
Now Carter faces a much tougher opponent, cancer. Carter is battling brain cancer with chemotherapy and other treatments.
His former batterymate Ron Darling "stands up" for Carter in a new ad.

The Greatest Day of My Life

There was a time in life when I was young and innocent. I always believed. And why not? I rooted for the Mets, the 1986 Mets in particular.
Those Mets were one of the greatest teams in the history of baseball. And it wasn't just that they won, it was the way the won.
Like July 3rd, when they trailed 5-3 in the 10th inning and then Darryl Strawberry homered to tie it and Ray Knight who had already struck out 4 times, homered in his 5th at bat to win it.
Or July 22nd, when the Mets beat the Reds in 14 innings while shuffling relievers between the mound and the outfield after several players got ejected during a bench-clearing brawl. I have described this game as one of my favorite games ever.
Or the entire NLCS against the Astros. The Mets constantly had their backs to the wall but they always won. They always believed and so did I.

25 years ago today, the Mets staged their greatest comeback.

Trailing by two runs, with two out and nobody on Gary Carter singled.

I don't remember exactly how I felt at the moment, but I know I hadn't given up the way I would have now.

Kevin Mitchell singled.

I remember watching this game with my entire family. We were crammed onto my parents bed.

Ray Knight singled. Gary Carter scored. Kevin Mitchell advanced to third.



At some point my mom admitted this game was "a little exciting."

Bob Stanley throws a wild pitch. Kevin Mitchell scores to tie the game. Ray Knight advances to second.



"Here comes Mitchell! Here comes Mitchell!"

And then it happened. The moment of pure joy and happiness that has stayed with me for 25 years.

Mookie Wilson hits a slow roller down the first base line.

Then Bob Murphy utters the 3 greatest words in the English language:

"Gets By Buckner!"

And in that moment we all started jumping on my parents' bed, as I am sure young kids all over New York did the same.



I'm getting chills while writing this. It was 25 years ago.

What an incredible moment. Proof that anything can happen, as long as you keep trying to make it happen.

The ensuing 25 years have not been kind to those Mets. Two days later (there was a rainout), they won the World Series. Three days later Dwight Gooden missed the victory parade because he was snorting coke in a hotel room. A confession he made only recently, though everyone knew it for years. Gooden served a suspension for drugs at the beginning of 1987 and the rest of the pitching staff was wracked by injuries. Then in 1988 the Mets lost in the NLCS to an inferior Dodgers team. By 1989 Carter and Hernandez and Mookie were too old and this amazing team only won one World Series.

Gooden and Strawberry were drug addicts. Kevin Mitchell was crazy too, reportedly killing a cat. Jesse Orosco, Doug Sisk and Danny Heep were the "Scum Bunch" who used to sit on the back of and drink and act like assholes. Gary Carter was media-obsessed and unpopular with his teammates.

But none of that mattered on October 25, 1986. All I know is the Mets won in the most impossible, unbelievable, exhilarating, thrilling and memorable fashion.

So memorable that it was turned into one of the greatest season highlight videos ever: "1986 Mets: A Year to Remember."

Note: that video uses the radio broadcast which is why I use Bob Murphy's "gets by Buckner" as opposed to Vin Scully's "gets through Buckner" even though I was watching on TV and listening to Scully at the time.

Over the years I have watched that video so many times and each time it brings me back to that moment on my parents' bed, with my family, jumping, screaming, hugging, and enjoying a moment the likes of which I have never seen in the 25 years since, and will likely never see again.

Monday, October 24, 2011

Say Yes to the Excess

I recently noticed an increase of hits for a very old post about a creepy cop, which was being prosecuted by fellow Susan Wagner High School alumnus Autumn Levine.
After I did some sleuthing I deduced the interest in Autumn stems from her recent appearance on TLC's wedding show "Say Yes to the Dress."



This video is only a minute long. But we can learn a few things. She still talks like a Staten Islander. She loves dark eye makeup. Her future husband is very rich. And she probably did get fake tits since high school, as rumored.