Thursday, September 29, 2016
An idiot Yankees fan (sorry for the redundancy) tried to propose to his girlfriend, but couldn't find the ring. The entire section was looking for it. Eventually they found it, seemingly in the cuff of her pants. Despite him being a complete moron, she said yes and they will live happily ever after. Now I don't want to insult the couple too badly, but they are the typical Yankees couple. He's a dead-eyed douchebag and she's cute but trashy. I wish them well.
Wednesday, September 28, 2016
Tuesday, September 27, 2016
Arnold Palmer passed away at age 87, after living a full life in which he had a drink named after him. Nails puts a little shot of vodka in his Arnold Palmer and calls in a John Daly. Andy Samberg joked that he wanted take the music from Beyonce's "Lemonade" album, and put Ice-T lyrics over it to create a new album called "Arnold Palmer."
Sunday, September 25, 2016
Talent prima donna Odell Beckham Jr had a fit on the sidelines after Eli Manning didn't throw him the ball, and he attacked the field goal kicker's practice net. The net fought back. I suppose it's much funnier if you are not a Giants fan.
Zero points. That seems about right. I'll do better this week. oakland -1 TENNESSEE Titans are a bad team that won last week. I don't see them making it two in a row. TAMPA BAY -5 los angeles. The Rams are a bad team that won last week. I don't see them making it two in a row. GREEN BAY -7 detroit Something is wrong with Aaron Rodgers. But something has been wrong with him many times before and he's always rebounded. I expect more of the same, especially against the woeful Lions. arizona -4 BUFFALO I like the Cardinals, the Bills, not so much. BEST BET pittsburgh -4 PHILADELPHIA The Eagles and Carson Wentz played probably the two worst teams in the NFL so far. They will get a rude awakening. I expect the Steelers to win by 30. Last week: 1-4 (0 points) Season: 1-4 (0 points) Best Bets: 0-1
Wednesday, September 21, 2016
Trey Mancini hit his first Major League home run for the Baltimore Orioles, and his mom Beth was there to see it. She was shocked, amazed and tearful, the exact reaction I would expect a mother to have. It was very similar to the reaction of Grandpa Matz when Steven had 3 hits in his Major League debut. I promise you if any of my kids ever homer, majors, minors, high school or Little League, I will make her reaction look subdued in comparison.
Sunday, September 18, 2016
Three years ago I was lucky enough to attend a Mets game and spend pre-game on the field, and take one of my favorite pictures ever, with Mr. and Mrs. Met. The experience I had before Friday's game against the Twins was even better. Thanks to the dogged persistence of a friend we were invited for a behind-the-scenes tour of the stadium by the Mets PR team. We entered at the Hodges gate, where right through that door is the press room where we often see Terry Collins discussing Mets injuries.
So I forgot Week 1. I probably would have started off with a -1 so good thing I didn't. We'll start and Week 2 and see what develops. NEW ENGLAND -6 1/2 miami This is dangerous because the Patriots looked good in a nationally televised game, but that doesn't mean all their worries are gone. Plus the Dolphins sucked. And as you know, all that could change very quickly in the NFL, which in case you forgot stands for Not For Long. tampa bay +7 ARIZONA Again I am going against my opposites theory but I just think this is a heck of a lot of points to give to Jameis Winston. indianapolis +7 DENVER Another big road dog, but I really wasn't impressed with Denver last week and Luck should be good for a backdoor cover. OAKLAND 4 1/2 atlanta The Falcons suck and the Raiders are a fun bandwagon team. BEST BET green bay -1 1/2 MINNESOTA I think Aaron Rodgers will pull this one out.
Friday, September 16, 2016
The Mets signed Tim Tebow to a minor league contract in a completely irrelevant, inconsequential and strictly PR move. He will never make the major league roster and it would be a shock if he was even good enough this year and in the Arizona Fall League, to get a spring training invite. That is unless, of course, he gets help hitting a curveball. "Are you trying to say Jesus Christ can't hit a curveball. Let's not start a holy war Harris."