Saturday, October 09, 2010

Weekly Picks

First solid week of the season. As long as I keep nailing my best bets I'll be ok.

CAROLINA -1 1/2 chicago
There are four winless teams in the NFL this year. All four of them are favored. No way that will ever happen again in week 5.

philadelphia +3 SAN FRANCISCO
If one of the winless teams is going to win, at least one of them is going to lose. For some reason people don't think they 49ers are as putrid as the others (Bills, Lions) but people are writing off the Eagles without Vick. I think Kolb will do enough to win this game.

green bay -2 1/2 WASHINGTON
I've been searching all over the internet and I still can't find the story about Aaron Rodgers's right arm being severed. So if that's not the case I do not understand how the Packers are not bigger favorites over the team with the 31st ranked defense.

atlanta -3 CLEVELAND
This spread also seems low to me. I really like the Falcons and the Browns won last week. I love to pick against bad teams coming off a win.

INDIANAPOLIS -7 kansas city

I've had some success so far this season picking a desperate team against a team off to a surprisingly good start (Cowboys over Texans and Giants over Bears) even laying points. This time the spread is half a point too big but I'm rolling the dice with it anyway.

Last week: 3-2 (4 points)
Season: 8-12 (10 points)
Best Bets: 1-0 (3-1)
Home Favorites: 1-2 (1-4)
Home Underdogs: 0-0 (1-0)
Road Favorites: 1-0 (3-6)
Road Underdogs: 1-0 (3-2)

Friday, October 08, 2010

Josh Hamilton Watches the Fox Business Network

Josh Hamilton was already one of my favorite players in baseball before he started watching Fox Business Network in the locker room.

Josh Hamilton enjoys Neil Cavuto and the Fox Business Network

Thursday, October 07, 2010

One of the Most Historic Nights in Baseball History...and I Missed It

While Roy Halladay was making baseball history by pitching a no-hitter in his first playoff start, I was at Chase's preschool listening to Miss Rosanne prattle on about her methods of teaching children to play with toys.
While she was pointing at us with her crooked finger (so freaky) Roy Halladay was joining Don Larsen as the only two pitchers to pitch no-hitters in a the playoffs.

Note: Larsen had two big things over Halladay: his was a perfect game, and it came in the World Series.

Halladay also becomes only the 5th pitcher in history to pitch two no-hitters in the same year. He joins Nolan Ryan, Virgil Truck and Johnny Vander Meer.

Note: Vander Meer pitched his no-hitters in consecutive games. That's the most unbreakable record in all of sports. No way anyone ever pitches three no-hitters in a row.

2010 could go down as the best year ever for no-hitters. Halladay's no-no was only the 6th this year (1990 & 1991 both had 7, including two on the same day) but this season had two perfect games and a playoff no-hitter. And it comes in a hitter's era.

This reminds me of something that happened 24 years ago. Master Bates and I were at Back to School Night and Wagner High School for Poop On Me during Game 6 of the 1986 NLCS, often called the best game ever played. The principal, Ralph Musco was giving updates, and eventually we went home with a neighbor to catch the game starting in the 14th.

Wednesday, October 06, 2010

Even Her Family Couldn't Clap and Say "Good Answer, Good Answer!" For This One

Best Family Feud answer ever. Steve Harvey was dumbfounded. I love how he stayed quiet for like a minute, and as soon as she broke the silence he yelled at her. Penis! Hilarious. I think this lady may have been taking the attention away from her awful family member. What the fuck is a para-educator? Paralegal, parallel, even para-Olympics is better than para-educator. So this lady knew they weren't going to win (she needed 177 points) so she just thought she'd have a funny moment and yell out "penis" when asked to name a body part men say is bigger than when they were 16.

2010 Baseball Playoff Predictions

Phillies over Reds in 4
Giants over Braves in 5

Yankees over Twins in 3
Rays over Rangers in 4

Phillies over Giants in 5

Yankees over Rays in 7

World Series
Phillies over Yankees in 6

World Series MVP
Roy Halladay

Please post your picks in the comments section

Song of the Week

"Waist Down" - Rome
One of the most obscure songs ever. I have been looking for it for years and never found it on youtube. Just a magnificent smooth, sexy R&B song. Love it.

Note: I accidentally posted this dated 9/2 but I'm not sure if anyone actually saw it. If you did, listen again.

Tuesday, October 05, 2010

Is There a Lot of Dry Air in Chicago?

Check out this story on bed bugs from CBS 2 in Chicago.

I can sympathize with this women. I really can. I know what it's like to have dry, hard boogers in your nose. You need to clean house but there is a TV camera and a person talking to it a few feet away. I understand all that. But eating it is where she lost me. She needed to flick it onto the floor and pretend nothing happened.

But good for CBS for exercising their copyright and removing this video from youtube. If you're going to stand in the way of content sharing, doing it to protect an employee from worldwide embarrassment is a pretty good reason.

The NFL is Poop - Week 4

Revenge is Sweet
The big story in the NFL this week is unquestionably the return of Donovan McNabb to Philadelphia. McNabb got a warm greeting from the fans at first which was nice, but got booed once the game started, which was expected. McNabb completed only 8 passes, but two of those were big ones, a 31-yarder TD to Chris Cooley, and a 56-yarder to Anthony Armstrong which would have been a TD had it been better thrown and Armstrong didn't fall down. He did get one more cheer from the crowd, when he overthrew a wide open Fred Davis. All week McNabb tried to downplay how badly he wanted revenge. Even in the postgame interview he told Pam Oliver it was all about team. But FOX had cameras in the locker room. He got the game ball and he did talk about the team, but he did let this slip "everybody makes mistakes, and they made a big one last year." Glad he's angry, I wish he had played better but I'm thrilled we won.

Karma Bites
Very seldom does anything I wish to happen actually happen. So seeing Michael Vick walk off the field with an injury and not return was a welcome sight for me. I just wish Jeffrey Lurie would have come down from the owner's box and done to Vick what Vick used to do to injured dogs. Pick him up and slam him into the ground, or against a wall until he died.

A Long Way To Go
The Redskins are tied for first place, and with a 2-0 division record they have a leg up on the Eagles and Giants. But there are still a lot of problems with this team. Once again, they built a big lead and couldn't add to it. Forget about scoring more points, they couldn't even make a first down to keep the Eagles off the field. And the defense was atrocious. Kolb was killing them with screens to McCoy and Celek and stupid Jim Haslett stuck with his zone defense which was getting picked apart. If Vick hadn't been hurt the Redskins lose. If the Eagles avoided a few other mistakes, penalties (dumb one at the end of the first half) and the like, the Redskins lose that game. And now we have an even bigger problem, the schedule gets tougher.

Next Week's Revenge
The Redskins play the Green Bay Packers and I hope we continue to avenge the mistreatment of animals by getting revenge on the owner of this dog for forcing it to wear a ridiculous cheesehead.

Great Fuckin Play By Roddy White
For years Don Beebe has been praised (rightfully so) for his play in the Super Bowl where he chased Leon Lett and stripped the ball right before Lett scored. That was a nice play, but it meant the Bills lost by 35 instead of 42. Roddy White made a similar play (click here to watch) but this one actually saved a game.
Nate Clements intercepted a pass with a minute-30 left in the game and the 49ers up by 1. He decided to run the ball back and was stripped. An incredible play by White is the difference between being 3-1 and 2-2.

Giants and Jets Bring the Pain
A good day for the New York teams as the Jets destroyed the Buffalo Bills 38-17. The Giants dominated the Bears 17-3, sacking Jay Cutler 9 times in the first half alone before knocking him out with a concussion. The Giants still look weak in spots, but the Jets are dominating and they should have beaten the Ravens and Week 1 and be undefeated right now.

The Last Unbeaten
Raise your hands if you had the Kansas City Chiefs being the last team with a zero in the loss column. The Bears and Steelers losing gives the idle Chiefs that title which they will lose next week on the road against the Colts.

Three Late Field Goals
The Jaguars, Saints and Falcons all kicked late field goals to win games. All of these results are puzzling to me. Shouldn't the Falcons and Saints have done more than eke out victories over the 49ers and Panthers? And what the hell is wrong with the Colts. They can't stop anyone, especially not on the ground. The Saints and Colts have a lot of work to do before they get back to the Super Bowl.

Picture of the Week
Interesting celebration between Correll Buckhalter and Daniel Graham. Looks like Buckhalter is sucking his dick, and Graham is gently guiding the back of his head.

looks like Correll Buckhalter is giving Daniel Graham a blow job

Monday, October 04, 2010

Asian Flight Attendants Dance to the Music of Lady Gaga and Katy Perry

Watch the flight attendants aboard Cebu Airlines spice up the pre-flight safety announcements with a little dance number.

I actually wasn't too impressed with the video but since 6 million people watched it in the past week I figured it was worth passing along.
These chicks don't hold a candle to my man Dave the Rapping flight attendant.

Baseball is Poop

The Dangers of Hitting Home Runs in the Steroid Era
Poor Jose Bautista. The guy hits 54 home runs, more than triple his previous season high and no one believes him. Ok, there are a few naive saps who point to his swing, and his unimpressive body (which hasn't undergone major changes) and herald him as the next great clean home run king. This is what the steroid era has done. We have no proof not even circumstantial evidence linking him to steroids other than a sudden drastic improvement in performance. Throughout the history of baseball, long before steroids were involved players drastically outperformed their previous career highs, but because Bautista is doing it now, he's viewed with a jaundiced eye. No one can say he's juiced, but no one can say he isn't, and no one wants to get fooled again.

A Fitting Tribute
The Toronto Blue Jays said goodbye (again) to the greatest manager in their history. Cito Gaston led the team to back-to-back World Series titles in 1992 and 1993 and returned for a swan song in 2008 to save the franchise from the disastrous John Gibbons era. At the last home game of the season Gaston was honored before the game and with signs throughout the ballpark. He was even treated to a post-victory Gatorade bath.

Cito Gaston gatorade bath

But the best tribute of all came from Travis Snider. Snider used eye black to create a faux Cito mustache. And homered while wearing it.

Travis Snider homered while wearing the Cito Gaston mustache

Where was Ramon Castro When the Lights Went Out?
In the dark silly. Former Mets catcher Ramon Castro was at bat for his new team, the Chicago White Sox, in new Comiskey Park (that's Kaminsky to you Mr. Obama) when all of the sudden most of the stadium lights when out.

lights go out at Comiskey Park

Sometimes the Worst Trades Are the Ones You Never Make
If you believe the rumors, and you might as well, the Mets could have traded Oliver Perez to the Cubs at the trading deadline for Carlos Zambrano. But the Mets insisted the Cubs take Luis Castillo too. The Mets didn't want to take on any extra money (between $6 and $8 million, I think). Since then Zambrano is 7-0 with a 1.48 ERA.

Sunday, October 03, 2010

This is What You Get When You Ignore Rules Prohibiting Fraternization

Jacksonville Jaguars player Kassim Osgood was pistol whipped by an intruder, an ex-boyfriend of his current girlfriend, Mackenzie Putnal.
Osgood is 30, Putnal is 19, and a ROAR Jaguars cheerleader. Their relationship violates NFL rules against players and cheerleaders dating, but that's the least of their problems.
Osgood and Putnal were watching TV in her parents house. The ex, Julian (that's unfortunate) Bartletto barged in with a gun and said "I can't believe you're with this guy."

Mackenzie Putnal isn't really hot enough to have an NFL boyfriend or a homocidal jealous ex
He pistol whipped them both and somehow in the struggle Osgood was able to get alone in a room. He barricaded the door with a chair then jumped out the window, onto the balcony and down to safety.
That left his girlfriend alone with the gunman. Somehow she was able to get a gun of her own. She shot at him, he shot at her, they both missed and somehow everyone came out unharmed.
Except for the dog, he got pistol-whipped too.
Except for their relationship, I can't imagine Putnal can feel safe in the arms of a guy fled the scene, leaving her behind to defend herself against an armed intruder.
Except for Bartletto who faces several charges including battery, burglarly and violating a restraining order.
And especially harmed in all this are the NFL rules. Although pretty much every NFL cheerleader would be willing to give up her low-paying job (roughly $50 a game) for the chance to fuck an NFL baller, maybe get pregnant, maybe get married.
Hey, it worked for Christy Cooley. This hot piece of ass got fired from the Redskinettes for fucking Chris Cooley, now she is the star of the NFL's ad campaign to market licensed apparel to women.

Story suggested by Billy