Friday, April 27, 2007

Former Mets Employee Deals Steroids

"A former employee of the New York Mets has pleaded guilty to distributing performance-enhancing drugs to dozens of major league players between 1995 and 2005, and is cooperating with baseball's steroids investigation.

Kirk Radomski, 37, admitted providing anabolic steroids, human growth hormone, Clenbuterol, amphetamines and other drugs to "dozens of current and former Major League Baseball players, and associates, on teams throughout Major League Baseball."

Radomski, a former Mets batboy who also worked as an equipment manager and clubhouse assistant while with the team from 1985-95, pleaded guilty to one count of distribution of a controlled substance -- anabolic steroids -- and one count of money laundering.

Radomski, who faces up to 25 years in prison and $500,000 in fines, was considered by authorities to be the chief supplier of drugs for baseball players after the feds shut down BALCO in 2003.

The affadavit contained blacked-out information, including what appeared to be players' names.

Sports Illustrated, quoting from the warrant, reported "numerous significant deposits from current and former [Major League Baseball] players and some affiliated individuals" were made to Radomski. He received more than $23,000, pulled from more than 20 different payments between 2003-05 that are alleged to have been made in conjunction with steroids purchases.

Howard Johnson, a Mets infielder in the 1980s and currently the team's first-base coach, told The Associated Press he remembered Radomski.

"He was a clubhouse kid, one of several, one of the kids that were there," Johnson said before the Mets played at Washington on Friday night.

Former Mets pitcher Ron Darling, now a team broadcaster, said he didn't remember Radomski.

"We were surprised and disappointed to learn of the guilty plea today," the Mets said in a statement. "The conduct in question is diametrically opposed to the values and standards of the Mets organization and our owners.

"We are and always have been adamantly opposed to the use of performance-enhancing drugs and continue to support Major League Baseball's efforts to eradicate any such use in our game," the team said.

This guy supposedly started dealing after he left the Mets. But he did use his clubhouse contacts. He also may have seen steroid use during his tenure with the team.

They're Good For His Heart

Hugh Grant got arrested in England for throwing a tupperware container of baked beans at a paparazzo.

1978 World Series of Poker

Part I:

Part II:

Part III:

Aired on CBS, Brent Musburger joins Jimmy The Greek. 42 entrants this year. Some guy in a top hat went all in with A-Q against pocket jacks. When a Queen came on the flop he lifted his hat off his head. He’s sort of dressed like the monopoly man. Thirty years ago and you still heard interviews about the young aggressive players coming up and chasing out the old guys. Johnny Moss announced his retirement after losing three straight hands with the ace-high flush, a wheel straight and pocket kings. Jimmy The Greek just mentioned a bet he made with Crandall Addington, from the 1973 World Series. They still show player’s wives on the rail. I think Shirley Baldwin might be hot, but the footage is grainy. The head’s up part, just the head’s up match between Bobby Baldwin and Crandall Addington lasted about four hours. Even with a straight Baldwin wouldn’t push all in. He would have won too because the river card that gave him the straight gave Addington trip 3s. Baldwin won with queens over 9s.

Syracuse Has a Women's Basketball Team?

Syracuse University forward Fantasia Goodwin gave birth last week.
That's two months after the end of the basketball season.
A season in which she played 28 games.
All of them except for the last one.
Because she finally told the coaching staff she was pregnant before the final game.
7 months pregnant.
How did people not notice?

Forbidden Kiss

An arrest warrant is out for Richard Gere in India for this kiss on Bollywood sexpot Shilpa Shetty. India's strict laws forbid kissing in public. And this wasn't a kiss, more like a sexual assault. Look how touchy he is with her, and how uncomfortable she gets.

Can't blame a guy for trying.

1973 World Series of Poker

I think we've all seen the World Series of Poker from 2003 - 2006 a million times. Thanks to youtube a lot of old Main Events are also available. I'm going to watch most of them (I've seen the mid-90s ones on ESPN Classic) and I encourage you do to do the same. I'll embed the clips then post my analysis at the end.

Part I:

Part II:

Part III:

Part IV:

Part V:

Hosted by Jimmy “The Greek.” Still $10,000 buy-in, but only 13 players. Largest field ever. Jimmy The Greek refers to it as an “extra-large” field. Amarillo Slim and Puggy Pearson are both smoking at the table. The Greek said it was three hours before the first meaningful encounter (Slim caught Jack Strauss on a bluff). The first knockout took about five hours. It was an amateur, the only one in the field. They actually made book on the event and he was listed as a 50 to 1 underdog. Defending champ Amarillo Slim got knocked out by runner-runner flush cards. Some things never change. Doyle went out 10th. He used to be a high school principal and has a master’s degree in education. The young prospect in the field was 33 years old, ancient by today’s standards. This had to have been the first feature ever done on chip tricks. The whole thing was shot more as a documentary than a card tournament. We know they didn’t have pocket cams but they didn’t even have a good overhead cam to show the board. Puggy Pearson beat Johnny Moss when his ace held up against Moss’ up and down straight draw.

Big Brother is Watching

Thanks to SCZA, I signed up for sitemeter, which gives me extensive information about traffic on this site.

I see where people are logging in from and when. It tells me how long people spend at the site, and what pages they click on.

Most important I see how people get here. Less than half of you type the address or use a bookmark. But those are my regular Poop readers. A lot of hits come from referrals, mostly from Google image searches. For instance if you google Michelle Damon or Elsa Benitez the first picture that comes up on the main google search page is from my blog. Those two sexy women drove a lot of traffic to the site.

I think most websites get this information but it only means something to me because I know where most of you live and work. TallSkott and Greco logged on from their work servers. I saw only one visit from Denver, Colorado yesterday so I wonder if one of the Freeds was too busy, or if the Poop is something they share together. Step On Me was a little distressed that I knew she logged on at 7:45, stayed on for 8 minutes and clicked on a picture of a very cute little girl.

But I promise the novelty of having this info at my fingertips will wear off very quickly.

Plus I have to find out who my readers in India, China, Kuwait, Israel, Australia, Belgium and Italy are. I got hits from all those countries yesterday.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Draft Gurus Unite!

I have created a group (called Paul's Poop, no password required) for's NFL Draft forecast.

The game is simple. Pick the first 15 guys in the correct order (regardless of team), and win a nice prize.
The grand prize is a Hummer. Not a hummer, PPD, capital H.

C'Mon Tim, You Should Know This

This reminds me of the time when none of us remembered that Jerome Bettis had asthma during a game of Taboo. Juice was furious and scolded us afterwards. I bet Russert got much worse from Brian Williams.

A Little Like a Bar Mitzvah Down Here

Papa Poop, Master Bates and I all love Ian Eagle, or as we call him Mr. EE-ahg-lay. But this video of him during a commercial of the Wizards-Cavs game, when he clearly didn't expect to be on camera, is quite amusing. Althought maybe Ian needs to loosen up a little. And Dr. Jack needs to wake up.

The Painted Sock?

Former Mets broadcaster, Gary Thorne, who currently works for the Orioles, said on air that Curt Schilling's famous bloody sock from the 2004 postseason was a PR stunt. And the redness on the sock was paint, not blood.

Gary Thorne: "It was painted. Doug Mirabelli confessed up to it after. It was all for PR."

Doug Mirabelli: "I never said that. I know it was blood. Everybody knows it was blood."

The Hall of Fame has the sock from the World Series says Schilling delivered it himself and they think it's real because the stain is now brown, as blood stains normally change color over time.

The New Adventures of Old Mike/New Christine

LA Times Columnist makes a stunning announcement in today's column.

He starts it like this:

"During my 23 years with The Times' sports department, I have held a wide variety of roles and titles. Tennis writer. Angels beat reporter. Olympics writer. Essayist. Sports media critic. NFL columnist. Recent keeper of the Morning Briefing flame.

Today I leave for a few weeks' vacation, and when I return, I will come back in yet another incarnation.

As Christine."

Very interesting. Good thing he doesn't have to interview Tim Hardaway. I really don't know much about transsexuals but I hope this change makes Mike, I mean Christine, a happier person.

Who the Fuck Drives a Maserati?

Billy asked me that very question last week.
Now I have his answer: every thug's dream wife, Eve aka e-v-e.
She crashed her gold Maserati and then got arrested for DUI.

I Guess He Doesn't Want Gay Men Looking At Him

from NY Post's Page6:

YOU can't be too careful, especially when you're high-profile anchorman Anderson Cooper. Cyber gossip Janet Charlton reports the white-haired CNN star regularly works out at the Equinox gym in the Time Warner Center, where he attracts a lot of attention from hard bodies of both genders. "So he takes precautions," Charlton reports. "Everyone knows camera phones are easy to smuggle anywhere, so sensible Anderson reportedly showers in his underwear. Boxer briefs, to be exact."

Pittsburgh: A Great Place to Live, But I Wouldn't Want to Live There

Pittsburgh was ranked the nation's "most livable city" by Rand McNally.
379 metropolitan areas were ranked in 9 categories and the lowest score won.
Basically Pittsburgh was average in every category which was good enough.
New York could never win because it's so unaffordable.

we're number one

The President Dances Like David Green

This was at a Malaria Awareness Day event.

I Was Mad When My Dad Spanked Me

This guy makes Alec Baldwin look like Ward Cleaver.
Byron Perkins convinced a judge, by crying, to let him out of jail so he could donate his kidney to his ailing son, Destin.
Before the last test, he took off with his girlfriend. Last night, after more than a year they caught this son of a bitch in Mexico.
I'd like all Poopheads to call their dads today and thank them for not being this guy.

A New Planet?

European astronomers have found a planet that looks similar to Earth.
They are still looking for a planet that looks like Uranus.

Many of you might suggest that I am stealing the Uranus joke gimmick from PTI's Tony Kornheiser. But that's not so. I have been making Uranus jokes ever since one night, probably more than 20 years ago, when trying to avoid going to sleep, Master Bates said to me "Hey Paul, you think anyone will ever land on Uranus?"

Wednesday, April 25, 2007

Growing Old

Be wary of birthdays that end in 9 because one beginning with a new number is right around the corner.
This year I turn 29, and a few months after that I’ll become a daddy.
I’ve already started to think like a dad a little bit.
I see a guy in my neighborhood walking his dog with one hand and holding onto his little girl with the other, as she is learning to roller skate.
I talked to a friend the other day about the beauty of baseball. He mentions that baseball is a game best enjoyed by fathers and sons. The first thought that comes to mind is not that of my own father, even though he’s part of the reason why I love baseball so much. The ball rolling through Buckner’s legs is a much bigger part, but thanks anyway dad. The first thought that comes to my mind is of someday taking my own son to Shea Stadium, I mean CitiField.
Buying him a hot dog, teaching him how to score; explaining the subtleties like the difference between a stolen base and a defensive indifference; or a wild pitch versus a passed ball.
Maybe I’ll have a little girl. And I’ll have to comb her hair. Buy her pink clothes. I hope Mrs. Poop can deal with the puberty related issues like training bras and menstruation.
I can’t wait to teach my kid to love my dog. To refer to a lick on the face as a kiss. To watch with wonder as our super dog flies through his hoop. To refer to him as “my big brother Diesel.” I wonder if “woof” will be the baby’s first word.
When I walk around the neighborhood I check out houses and think to myself “that would be a nice yard for kids to play in.”
But sometimes I worry. What if my kid were in that classroom in Virginia Tech. You spend your whole life saving for college and some dickwad ends your kid’s dreams and his life.
And I don’t have to worry about that for at least another 14 years. Even if our child inherits my precocious intelligence I doubt Mrs. Poop will let him/her go to college before age 14. Maybe we’ll all be living in bulletproof bubbles by then. Or colleges we be abolished because of the impending threat and everyone will have class on the internet.
You know you’re in love when someone else’s happiness is more important than your own. When not only do you sit through a concert by a children’s singer, but you enjoy watching the kids dance and jump around.
And someday I’ll be watching with pride as it’s my kid buzzing like a bumblebee at the Laurie Berkner concert.
Or my kid will be going to the first day of school.
Or striking out with two men on in the bottom of the 6th in Little League, or the Pony Tail league.
And going off to college.
And getting married.
And eventually my kid will be having kids.
I’ll be a grandfather.
I’m growing old.

Dwyane Wade's House

If you liked LeBron's, Carmelo's and Steve Alford's, you are going to love Dwyane Wade's house. He built the Miami area house only two years ago and he's already selling it, completely with memorabilia, for the bargain price of only $8.9 million.

The aerial view

Through the front gates

The foyer

The master bedroom

The kid's room

The kid's bathroom

A jungle gym behind the crib, so the kids can play, enjoy youth

Let's go swimming, let's go swimming

the rest of the backyard

The D-Wade memorabilia comes with the house

Idol Chatter

For a show that featured inspiring songs, this episode was pretty uninspiring.

Chris Richardson sang a song he didn't even understand. He thought "Change the World" was about someone changing the world to feed the hungry or cure disease, when it's actually about a dude who wants to bang some chick who won't give him the time of day.

Melinda sang a song no one ever heard of. But she did it really well. I must say they are really making her and LaKisha look better each week.

Blake sang "Imagine" and it was completely boring.

Phil Stacey sucked.

And Jordin brought down the house and I think she may have passed Blake as my front runner to win.

I think we're getting down to crunch time starting next week, but this wee, quite obviously, Phil Stacey is going home. Expect Chris and Melinda in the bottom 3.

Royals Not Popping Bottles

Minnesota Twins outfielder recently sent four bottles of Dom Perignon to the Kansas City Royals to thank them for beating the Detroit Tigers last year which allowed the Twins to win the division.
A blog called "The Cheater's Guide to Baseball," discovered this and reported that this gift is actually a violation of MLB rules.

Rule 21-b states "Any player or person connected with a Club who shall offer or give any gift or reward to a player or person connected with another Club for services rendered ... in defeating or attempting to defeat a competing Club ... shall be declared ineligible for not less than three years."

Normally I like to play Devil's Advocate but I really can't see the logic behind this rule. Unless for example the Yankees had a standing policy to give $10,000 to a pitcher on another team who beat the Red Sox. But in this circumstance, Hunter's actions were innocent.

The Royals had not popped the bubbly yet so they will return the bottles to avoid the infraction. Hunter says he was unaware of the rule, but ignorance is not a plea. Hopefully, baseball will not act, not even with a small fine but I know some douchebag sticklers will probably call for Hunter to be subject to a three year ban.

Happy Endy

Endy Chavez saves the day. Read the Happy Recap.

Endy is my hero

Song of the Week

"It was a Good Day" - Ice Cube

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

A Good Day

Monday April 23rd was a good day.
I still had the memories of Sunday April 22nd, so that was nice.
After work I did some yard work, mowed the lawn. We are trying to repair some dead spots (dog urine) so I had to rake the loose soil. Mrs. Poop was standing over me watching.
I sang slave songs. "Massah got me working!." "Jimmy crack corn and I don't care."
Then I went to bed.
After a short rest I woke up to birds chirping and kids playing.
For dinner, I fired up the grill and grilled two steaks to perfection. Mine had those nice dark grill lines. Mrs. Poop fed half of hers to the dog.
After dinner I took Diesel for a walk and listened to the Met game.
It was a perfect cool night, for a walk and for a baseball game.
Jose Valentin homered and the Mets won easily.
I sold three Jose Reyes cards for $510.
And I didn't even have to use my AK.
Damn right it was a good day.

Psychopathic Murders Need Love Too

Virginia Tech madman Cho Seung-Hui hired an escort a month before he went on his murderous rampage - and she described him as a timid dork who "creeped" her out by the time their one-hour session was over.

Chastity Frye said paid her to meet him at a motel in Valley View, about two hours' drive from Virginia Tech's campus.

"I danced for a little while and I thought we were done because he got up and went to the restroom and began washing."

The escort said she asked Cho if she could leave, but he wanted his money's worth.

"He's like, 'I paid for the full hour, you've only been here for 15 minutes,' and then he came back in the room," she said.

"And I started dancing and that's when he, you know, touched me and tried to get on me, and that's when I pushed him away."

But Frye, who was contacted by authorities after the FBI traced her through Cho's credit card receipts, said she wasn't afraid because he immediately backed off.

She said she thought she recognized Cho in the news last week, but it wasn't until the FBI reached out to her that she knew for certain she'd given a lap dance to a mass murderer.

She said the FBI asked her to describe Cho in three words.

" 'Dorky,' was one of them, maybe 'timid' and 'pushy' - there, at the end, he was a little pushy," she said.

Now she wishes she'd done more to reach out to Cho.

"Sometimes I wonder if I could have said something or done something differently," she said.

"But I wasn't thinking about that at the time. I was thinking, he was creeping me out. I was thinking about getting out of there."

Darren Baker Redux

Four year-old kid is standing on the sidelines at Colorado State's spring game. Quarterback throws a nice fade to the wide receiver who makes the catch and crushes the poor little kid. Despite a lot of blood Caden Thomas is going to be ok. He had about 30 stitches but no head injuries. Clearly Caden is to blame, watch him on the slo mo replay, his head is down. You have to be alert at all times, keep your head on a swivel.

One of Pizza Parlor Derek's favorite coaches, Sonny Lubick aka Mr. Thursday Night, sent some footballs to the kid in the hospital.

That's the good news. The bad news is he's going to have a small scar in the shape of a football on his forehead and it's going to hurt everytime he watches a CSU game.

Tonight Show Headlines

Believe it or not one of my favorite things is that silly headlines segment of really stupid stories from newspapers that Jay Leno does on Mondays. Normally I steal freely but this time I'll credit Leno for these gems.

Only in Eerie, Pa

The future of energy: wind power!

What exactly are these women selling here?

And the cops were stumbling around with their eyes closed

Small error

read this out loud

Enrollment in the bird watchers club immediately tripled

Dave Halberstam Dies

One of my favorite sports writers, Dave Halberstam was killed in a car accident in California. Details of the accident are not clear yet. Halberstam was 73.

He was on his way to interview Y.A. Tittle for an upcoming book on the 1958 NFL Championship game. The game that really launched the sport.

I've read three of his books, so I suppose that makes him one of my favorite authors. I've read many more works by Dr. Seuss and J.K. Rowling but Halberstam is up there.

"Summer of '49" was an interesting book that traced the Red Sox - Yankees rivalry to its early stages.

"October 1964" was a great book. This one I would recommend. Quite obviously it's about the 1964 World Series between the Cardinals and the Yankees. I have always called the 1964 Cardinals the most influential team in baseball history. Then I read this book and - surprise! - I was right.

"Teammates" is the story of Johnny Pesky and Dom DiMaggio taking one last trip to visit their dying buddy, Ted Williams. Two things struck me from this book. First of all, Ted Williams was a miserable sonovabitch. The precursor to today's spoiled me-first athletes. Second, Dom DiMaggio was the brother of Joe DiMaggio and the best friend of Ted Williams and he was happier than both of them. They were better at baseball but he was better at everything else. He became very rich thanks to some shrewd business deals, if I recall, and stayed married to the same woman his whole life.

I have never read "The Breaks of the Game" but I've heard good things about it and maybe I'll give it a whirl.

I also want to read Halberstam's bio of Bill Belichick called "The Education of a Coach."

Sad to see such a great writer pass, especially under those circumstances.


Believe it or not Jessica Dube has actually recovered and they are skating again. She has a nasty four inch gash from the middle of her left cheek to the bridge of her nose, but I would have thought she'd have looked like one of the Carver's victims.

Some People Will Never Learn

Three female officers filed a federal complaint against the New York Police Department on Monday, claiming their sergeant and a colleague insulted them.
During daily roll call Sgt. Carlos Mateo allegedly addressed officers Trennet Jackson, Maria Gomez and Karen Nelson by saying "'Hos, stand up!"
When the officers refused to stand up, another officer, Ralph Montinez, allegedly said, "No sergeant, not just 'hos; nappy-headed 'hos."
"We felt violated, hurt and humiliated," said Jackson.

Giving Her the Bryon Russell Treatment

This picture showed up on the internet reportedly taken in Cabo a few weeks ago. Michael Jordan getting down with a couple of hot young chicks. Not pictured: Juanita Jordan.

billy is so jealous...for the wrong reasons

Sheryl Crow's Dirty Cooch

Sheryl Crow has a solution to global warming, but it might result in yeast infections.

She proposes a limit on toilet paper.

"I propose a limitation be put on how many sqares of toilet paper can be used in any one sitting...we can make it work with only one square per restroom visit, except, of course, on those pesky occasions where 2 to 3 could be required."

I like to use as much as needed to get the job done. Then three more squares just to make sure.

But maybe Sheryl Crow has a bidet. Or a servant with a warm bottle of water and a soft sponge.

Monday, April 23, 2007

What Really Happened

You are going to hear a lot about what happened between Sheryl Crow and Karl Rove at the White House Correspondents' Dinner. Don't believe the liberal media, believe me:

Laurie David, wife of Larry and Producer of "An Inconvenient Truth," and Sheryl Crow approach Karl Rove demanding to talk about global warming. They asked him what the administration has done. He compared the United States to other countries that do much less to fight global warming. They persisted. Rove decided he no longer wished to discuss the matter with them. Remember, this is a formal dinner, but it's supposed to be informal. When Rove went to leave, Sheryl Crow grabbed his sleeve. He said "don't touch me." She said "you work for me." A very arrogant and condescending thing to say.

You are going to hear that the obnoxious Karl Rove and the arrogant Bush Administration beating up on two poor little women. Don't believe it. You all know how self-righteous liberals can be. Trust me on this one, it was Sheryl Crow's fault.

Classy Penn State Fans

Three Poopheads are Penn State alums and none of them have any class. They married classy ladies, but adjacency to class is not class itself.
But the Penn State fans at the spring football game showed some class this weekend.
Many of them showed in Virginia Tech t-shirts. The man in the middle of this picture is the father of Jeremy Herbstritt, who went to Penn State then Virginia Tech for grad school.

The card block section reveals a Virginia Tech logo.

Joe Paterno brings a Virginia Tech hat to the media room.

This Explains the Delay

At the game Bill and I had no idea what was going on. Nor did we see anything from where we were seated. Right behind home plate, and back a few rows.

A New York Mets fan pleaded not guilty Sunday to shining a high-powered flashlight at an Atlanta Braves pitcher and shortstop during a game at Shea Stadium.
Frank Martinez was arraigned on charges of interfering with a professional sporting event and second-degree reckless endangerment. He was held on $1,000 bail and is due back in court May 1.
Authorities said the 40-year-old Martinez flashed the light at the players in the bottom of the eighth inning Friday from his seat behind home plate. He quickly was ejected from the game.
"The defendant's alleged actions recklessly endangered the lives of players and spectators and caused a temporary delay to the game," Queens District Attorney Richard Brown said.
The Braves were leading the Mets 7-0 at the time of the incident. Tim Hudson was on the mound facing Mets pinch hitter Endy Chavez when, investigators said, Martinez turned the beam on the Braves pitcher and shortstop Edgar Renteria.
Renteria complained to umpire Paul Emmel, who called time out and alerted security. The security officers removed Martinez and found a "a small, streamline flashlight" in his backpack, Brown said.
If convicted, Martinez faces up to a year in jail and a $5,000 fine."

Cashing In

About 3 to 4 years ago I bought 8 Jose Reyes 2001 Bowman Chrome Rookie Cards. I had them all graded for condition. My total cost for the 8 cards plus grading was about $400. Now I am selling the three cards that got the worst grades (8.5), to lock in some gains now that Reyes cards are really hot. I still have 5 that are graded 9.0 (book value: $875, but that will go up to at least $1500) in the next few months.
I'm also selling some other items, if you want to check out and see how my auctions are going.

For sale: three great rookie cards of the best player on the Mets

What I Should Have Said Theater

NBC is catching a lot of heat for its continuous airings of the photos and video sent to them by the Virginia Tech killer Cho Seung-Hui. This is what they should have said:

“NBC was unwillingly lured into this Virginia Tech tragedy when the killer sent a package containing still photographs and video clips to our headquarters. We have no idea why he chose to send this package to us, maybe our address is the easiest to remember. Upon receiving the package and determining what it was, we immediately turned it over to the proper authorities. We will air limited portions of the video tonight to give the public a look into the disturbed mind of this brutal killer. But after tonight we will never air them again. We believe that the killer made these tapes with the hope that the network and cable news channels would splash them all over the TV. We are not going to grant a suicidal and homicidal maniac his dying wish. To do so would be disrespectful to the memory of those that he so savagely murdered. But because we are a news organization and we believe in the freedom of information we will be posting the materials in their entirety on our website. We will allow each of you the choice to decide if you want to see just how crazy this son of a bitch was. And if you do decide that you would like to view the killer’s manifesto, then we would also suggest that you visit the section of our website dedicated to honoring his 32 innocent victims.”

The Killer Played Beer Pong

At the beginning of the last school year Cho Seung-Hui's two suitemates befriended him and he actually went out and got drunk with him, at which point he loosened up and starting talking a little bit, he also played beer pong.

It was down to the final shot, and it was Cho's turn to sink a ping-pong ball in a beer-filled cup from across a table. Cho stared down a cup of beer and nailed the shot with amazing accuracy.

Their friendship ended when they went to dinner one night and Cho took a picture of the girls seated at the next table. When the girls looked over Cho pretended nothing happened. And the other two dudes realized Cho had cockblocked them and they stopped inviting him to dinner.

Sunday, April 22, 2007


Mrs. Poop and I spent Sunday with our nieces, Cayla and Jenna (and their parents) in Central Park for a concert. A free concert by Laurie Berkner. If you've never heard of her, you will. Someday. I must admit I was very wrong. I expected 2,000 - 3,000 people. There were that many people named "Madison."

thousands of kids and their obnoxious parents

Cayla got to the park at around 10am because she wanted to get a good spot, and then the rest of us snuck in right before the concert started. Laurie came on at about 1, and her first song was an Izzie favorite, "Victor Vito." Victor Vito is the story of two polar bears on a trip around the United States discovering the local food like rice and beans (in New Mexico), tobasco (in New Orleans) and spaghetti (in New York). But they also discover themselves.

Note: links on song titles will direct you to the music video from noggin. It will launch a windows media player but you will have to sit through a ten second open before the song starts.

this is laurie...she has a weird power over kids

The second song was the club banger, "Bumblebee (Buzz Buzz)." This song is sort of like "Ruff Ryderz Anthem" for kids. But instead of 6 idiots jumping around in 920 Ackerman, there were 6000 toddlers jumping around in Central Park. And instead of "Stop! Drop! Shut em down open up shop," there is "buzz buzz buzz-buzz-buzz, buzz buzz buzz-buzz!"

They also played a Cayla favorite "Catch You," which she sang while running away from Aunt Step On Me. Mrs. Poop likes this song because on Thursday you are supposed to have yourself a nurse day.

We also heard the educational "We are the Dinosaurs" which teaches kids about prehistoric creatues and the possible ramifications of global warming, as well as how to march, for those children who aspire to military careers. Whaddya think of that?

Then came my least favorite song, "Let's Go Swimming." Before this song, if you said to Cayla "Let's Go..." she would reply "Mets!." But this song ruined all of that. Now if you try it she says "SWIMMING!" Fish don't take showers. And noses and toeses don't rhyme. Well, they do rhyme but only because toeses isn't a word.

One of the last songs is appropriately title "Pig on Her Head." I think you can figure that one out.

Laurie has a pig on her head...and she keeps it there...ALL DAY!

ball playing was permitted during the concert
one cute little niece

me and the biggest Laurie Berkner fan in the whole park