Friday, March 02, 2007

Tyra Banks is So Lucky

Idol Chatter

Kelly Pickler got a boob job!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

I'm starting to give some credence that this Vote for the Worst thing might be working. Antonella and Sanjaya should definitely be gone. But as the field thins the people who vote for good singers will combine and outweigh the idiots. But no one irreplaceable has gone yet.

But I bet some of you thought that Alaina Alexander was hot. Can't believe she couldn't get through her song though.

Never sing Dixie Chicks anti-Bush songs. You will go home.

Loved LaKisha singing "Midnight Train to Georgia." That is one of my favorite songs of all time. But I would love LaKisha if she sang "Paul is a Douchebag."

The chick who sang "Dangerously in Love" was pretty good too.

Nice to see Phillippi Sparks.

Thursday, March 01, 2007

Hot For Teacher

A middle school teacher accused of having sex with at least five boys -- some of them students at her school -- was arrested.
Police began investigating Allenna Williams Ward, 23, after school officials recovered a note containing inappropriate messages.
Ward, who is married, had sexual encounters with the 14- and 15-year-old boys at various locations, including in the school, at a motel, in a park and behind a restaurant, from December to this month, according to arrest warrants.
Some of the victims were students at Ward's school.
This happened in South Carolina.

Wednesday, February 28, 2007

JC's Bones

Knicks might be in big trouble without JC for the rest of the season. They have an outside shot at the playoffs this season but JC is their go to guy down the stretch of close games. Maybe in his absence, someone like Marbury or Francis can step up. But of course I love JC and I doubt the toughness of Starbury and Franchise. Maybe their best strategy late in close games is to chuck up bad shots and let David Lee grab the rebounds.


Guests at Sports Illustrated's swimsuit issue party on Feb. 14 and a dozen other events may have been exposed to Hepatitis A.
The Los Angeles County Department of Public Health urged anyone who ate raw food at the Sports Illustrated event, held at the Pacific Design Center in West Hollywood, to receive an immune globulin shot.
The advisory was issued after an employee of Wolfgang Puck Catering was diagnosed with acute Hepatitis A.
Anyone with symptoms – such as vomiting, diarrhea, darkened urine, jaundice -- is ordered to contact their doctor immediately.
Beyonce was there and may have been exposed due to some bad oysters.

Cornbread, There's Something Wrong With That

Cedric "Cornbread" Maxwell is in trouble over some comments he made about a female referee, Violet Palmer.
Maxwell is the radio analyst for Celtics games on WEEI.
After he disagreed with one of her calls he suggested Palmer should "go back to the kitchen."
Then he followed that up with "Go in there and make me some bacon and eggs, would you?"

Song of the Week

"Don't Matter" - Akon
I liked the guy when he first came out but his first two songs from the new album were too commercial and sounded the same.
I like the vibe on this one

Oh Snap

Gruesome injury for Clippers guard Shawn Livingston. He quite obviously, dislocated his patella and an MRI revealed tears in the anterior cruciate ligament, posterior cruciate ligament, medial collateral ligament and lateral meniscus.
He's out at least 8 to 12 months and may never play again, or be the same player if he does come back.

Idol Chatter

Guys' performances were much better this week.

Sanjaya and the litte gay Hispanic kid, AJ, need to go home this week. What the fuck was up with Sanjaya's whole gimmick? He sang like he had a secret. I couldn't hear him above the band.

I like Jared Cotter because he sang one of my favorite songs ever, "Let's Get It On" and even though he wasn't anywhere close to Marvin, I still liked it. Plus whenever they say his name I hear "Harry Potter" and that makes me smile.

I love Chris with the big curly hair. He definitely married up, I know what that's like, and he's funny. But he needs to tell a new joke every week. "I bet you're wondering why I called this meeting" isn't going to last much longer. He also needs to choose a song some of us have heard of.

I hate the other Chris, the JT impersonator. Whenever he does his dance move (bouncing up and down) he moves his mouth away from the mike and his sound goes in and out. Also not sure but I think the song is about a geek who gets pussy (ie in the pink), or maybe it's about a geek who wears pink shirts. I'm sure Special K has the CD so maybe TON can explain it to me.

I liked Brandon singing "Time After Time" but I was hoping he would do a verse in Spanish like when Earl and Randy went to Mexico to bring back Catalina. I agreed with Simon that no one really cares that he dedicated the song to his grandmother. If the song sucks and the performance is boring no one is going to vote for him because of his grandmama. But it did give Simon the chance to say "I like puppies."

Love the beatboxing kid, Blake. He's going to have a hard time balancing the voters who like it, and the voters who grow sick of it though.

Loved Sundance even though he sang the same 8 words "all you wanna do is ride around Sally" 8 times. It's cool that he just had a kid. And that the kid already has a goatee. And it's only a matter of time before "We Want Head" t-shirts and signs start popping up.

Gary Matthews Jr. Implicated In Roids Ring

An Orlando pharmacy was raided by a law enforcement task force part of a large New York state grand jury investigation into Internet drug sales that could expose widespread illicit steroid use by professional athletes and thousands of people across the nation.
More than two dozen doctors, pharmacists and business owners have been, or will be, arrested in the coming days in Alabama, Texas, Florida and New York on sealed indictments charging them with various felonies for unlawfully distributing steroids and other controlled substances.
Investigators uncovered evidence that testosterone and other performance-enhancing drugs may have been fraudulently prescribed over the Internet to current and former Major League Baseball players, National Football League players, college athletes, high school coaches, a former Mr. Olympia champion and another leading contender in the bodybuilding competition.
The customers include Los Angeles Angels center fielder Gary Matthews Jr., according to sources with knowledge of the investigation.
Matthews hit 17 homers in 2005 and 19 in 2006, while raising his average to .313. In the offseason he signed with the Angels for $50 million over 5 years.

Tuesday, February 27, 2007

Georgia Derek Has Erin Andrews, Who You Got?

Some other blog is doing a 16-team tournament to find out the hottest female sideline reporters. I'm not going to the follow the action but I'd like to hear your opinions on the matter.

We know Georgia Derek will pick Erin Andrews, the top seed.

We know Joe Namath is pulling for the second seed, Suzy Kolber.

You think I am going to say third seeded Pam Oliver, but I'm going to go with a huge upset and say #7 seeded Rachel Nichols is the hottest girl in the field.

Watch her in action

It Worked

Pat Summitt came out onto the court during a TV timeout early in the first half wearing a Tennessee cheerleader's outfit and a silly hat. She gave the hat to Dick Vitale, led the crowd (including Peyton Manning) in the singing of "Rocky Top," then climbed atop a miniature human pyramid.
She appeared to be wearing a pair of shorts under her cheerleading skirt. Or maybe they were control top pantyhose.
Incidentally, it had the desired effect. Tennessee jumped out to a huge lead and held on to beat Florida by 10.

Pat Summitt Topless

To repay Bruce Pearl for showing up to a women's basketball game with his chest painted, Pat Summitt plans something special for the men's game against Florida.
Not sure what this entails but it probably mean her in a cheerleading sweater, doubt if she'll go the skirt route.

More Slutty Antonella Pics

These new pictures of Antonella Barba in more compromising situations seem to be real. But these Not Safe For Work Blowjob Pictures are probably fake. Even though they look a lot like her the internet seems to think it's a porn-doppelganger.

News Delivery

Over the past 5 days I've heard from almost every Poophead congratulating me on Baby Poop.
Some of you have expressed shock, surprise, outrage and even dismay that I used the blog to disseminate such news.
For us, this was a great way to share the news.
We enjoyed reading your congratulatory e-mail missives and receiving your phone calls. For us it's a much better process than making 20 phone calls and more fun than sending out one mass mail.
We're sorry if some of you felt left out or unimportant because you weren't called or notified directly.
But this is the way we chose to share our news because it was fun for us. I hope when you are fruitful and multiply that you choose to contact us in whichever medium you choose because we'd be very happy to receive your call, letter, e-mail or singing telegram.

One side note about the miscarriage. Maybe this is a thing a lot of people do feel should be private, and at first we felt the same way. As a matter of fact hardly anyone knew until February 22nd. But some people did know, and we had to talk about it a lot with doctors so it didn't feel like such a private matter. And we felt that keeping it secret gave it undue importance, made it a major issue, as opposed to what it is now, just a minor bad thing that happened once, that no longer matters.

Hopefully, should any of you in the future (god forbid) suffer that tragedy you will know that the Poops are here for you and have gone through the same thing. We took great comfort in friends of ours who had a miscarriage, followed by a healthy pregnancy and were able to support us.

Your Mother's a Hoya

Seems like SU's victory over Georgetown clinched a tournament berth, and even I would have to agree that they are in.
A win over Villanova could give them a first round Big East bye and they could once again ride a late season surge to a 5 seed or better. Most likely SU will end up as a 7 or 8 and lose in the first round, maybe second.
But this team is starting to come together at the right time and some of the younger players are contributing.
However, Boeheim is basically down to 6 men right now (Roberts, Watkins, Nichols, Rautins, Harris - five names ending in S - plus Devendorf).
I love what I have seen from Rautins. He is hitting about 60% from 3 over his last 5 games.
I also like the way Harris is developing, I've spent the whole season saying he looks like a woman and plays like a girl but he is finally getting tough rebounds.
Harris and Devendorf are way too turnover prone and force too many passes and too many drives.
Nichols never seems to have a good first half and the announcers always say some variation of "SU is down 4 with almost no production from the Big East's leading scorer."
Then he scores 14 in the second half and has 20 again.
Watkins and Roberts are finally learning their roles and executing them well and showing me something, especially Roberts who has been playing with an injured knee.

Monday, February 26, 2007

Tell Me About Halle Berry's Tits

Billy Bob Thornton has being doing a lot of press lately, including an interview where he encountered Steelers's linebacker Joey Porter.
Thornton was headed to New York and because his manager is a Steelers' fan they stopped in Pittsburgh to see a Steelers game. Thornton was on the field before the game when Joey Porter came up to him and said "hey man, you got to tell me about Halle Berry!"
I was wondering the same thing.

that's not Billy Bob, but I loved that kid

I Thought This Shit Only Happens in Elevators in Sitcoms

Former Met Ty Wigginton and his wife had their second child a few days before Christmas. In their house. In the walk-in closet. Ty delivered the child.

His wife, Angela, went into intense labor two weeks early so he had no choice but to deliver the baby himself.
“He was out in less than a minute,” Wigginton said. “One or two pushes, and he was ready to see the world.”
The baby was healthy. The delivery, given the circumstances, was smooth. But it was not without drama. And some chaos.
Angela lying on the floor of the walk-in closet. Their 3-year-old son, Chase, sick and scared, locked in the adjacent bedroom, screaming “Is Mommy o-tay?” Ty getting step-by-step instructions from a 911 operator, then giving Angela the phone so he could have both hands free to tie the umbilical cord with a lace he took out of his shoe.
“I think adrenaline took over. It’s kind of all a blur,” Ty said. “It was unbelievable.”
The unforgettable episode started around 3:45 the morning of Dec. 20, when Angela woke with contractions about seven minutes apart. “I asked her, 'Do we need to go?’ and she says, 'We’re all right,’ ’’ Wigginton said.
A couple of hours of more intense contractions later, Angela — who went through a 14-hour labor with Chase — changed her mind. She began getting ready for a trip to the hospital, though expecting the doctors would simply send them home. Ty was already up with Chase preparing to drop him off at Angela’s parents’ house.
“About 6 o’clock she’s in the closet trying to get dressed, and I’m getting our son ready to go out the door and she yells, 'We’re having this baby now,’ ’’ Wigginton said.
“I think she’s kidding. Then I come around the corner and, sure enough. … I called 911 and told them to get somebody over there. And like a minute later, I’m holding the baby in my arms.”
It took about 10 more minutes for the paramedics to get there, though Wigginton said it seemed like an hour.
“The baby came out and he looked great,” Ty said. “The scary part was that he never really cried until the EMTs got there, but he was breathing. His tongue was moving in and out of his mouth. I could feel his heart beating. They just told me to keep wiping his nose and mouth and keep him wrapped in a towel.”
The baby weighed 7 pounds, 2 ounces, measured 18 inches and seemed a perfect fit for the name they had already picked out: Cannon.
“He dropped just like a cannonball,” Ty said.
Wigginton has had no medical training, unless you include watching TV. “I love Untold Stories of the ER,” he said. “So maybe now we can have Untold Stories of the Closet.”
“Next time, if she even sneezes or coughs, we’re going to the hospital,” Wigginton said. “I don’t care if she is only two weeks pregnant.”

Met Gets Waxed

Madame Tussauds Wax Musuem in New York has 204 wax figures, 5 of them are Yankees (Jeter, Steinbrenner, Ruth, Mantle and DiMaggio). But there are no Mets, until April 2. That's when a new statue will be unveiled, but they haven't said who it will be.
I vote for David Wright and I really can't imagine them doing anybody else because they said it will be a current Met. And evidently the statue will have hair, ruling out Mr. Met and Carlos Delgado.

Sunday, February 25, 2007

Diesel's a Son of a Bitch

A store owner in Seattle has pissed off residents by opening a pet store (catering to high end products for female dogs) by calling the store High Maintenance Bitch.

Whose Boobies Do You Want To See?

Fascinating question from Pizza Parlor Derek