Friday, June 06, 2008

Sex and the City Portrays Women as Sluts, In Other Words, Accurately

The New York Daily News did the math on "Sex and the City" and this is what they found:
During 94 episodes the four sluts slept with 94 men, and one woman.
Samantha fucked 41 men, and the aforementioned woman.
Carrie and Charlotte were tied at 18 and Miranda had 17, 16 more than credulity would allow.
Compared to the average American woman who only fucks 9 guys in her whole life, never mind just a few years, according to Durex condoms, a trusted source of surveys.
But New York women are believed to sleep with twice as many girls as the average slut.
Then the News interviewed some local sluts to get their opinion.
"I stopped counting at 56," says Christine, 35, a locations director from Bayside who lives in SoHo. "There are so many opportunities to meet men here - bars, restaurants, clubs, walking down the street, the deli. Men are everywhere."
Brooklynite Linda, who has been with 13 men, agrees. "I'm married now, but when I was single, I had a blast. Sex was empowering. I once had sex on [the] F train. It was three in the morning and the car was empty. So we were like, 'Why not,'" says the 39-year- old Carroll Gardens artist.
"The women on 'Sex and the City' went through so many guys they devalued sex," says Crystal, 22, an exotic dancer at Rick's Cabaret in midtown. "I've seduced thousands of men, but my actual number of sex partners is one, maybe one and a half. Sex should be special."
There is no way a stripper only banged one dude. What does half mean? She's obviously not counting the ones who paid her for it in the V.I.P.

NFL Snitch

New England Patriots offensive lineman Nick Kaczur was arrested in April for illegal possession of oxycodone (Oxycontin) and rather than take the rap Kaczur wore a wire and flipped on his supplier.
A DEA agent said a cooperating witness -- whose name was not revealed -- wore a recording device during three drug buys in May. In each of the deals, the witness bought 100 OxyContin pills from Daniel Ekasala for $3,900 in cash.
Ekasala's lawyer says the cooperating witness was Nick Kaczur.
Kaczur told investigators he had been purchasing hundreds of oxycodone pills from the man since November 2007.
Kaczur denied taking part in a federal investigation or buying drugs and said he was not familiar with Ekasala.
"I don't know what you're talking about, bro," Kaczur said on the front porch of his Attleboro, Mass., home. "I don't know where this is coming from. I don't know what you are talking about."
New York State Police said Kaczur was charged with criminal possession of a controlled substance in the seventh degree, a misdemeanor, following an April 27 traffic stop on the New York State Thruway.
Kaczur had been pulled over for speeding in Whitestown, N.Y., when police discovered a "small amount of controlled substance for which he did not have a prescription," a substance identified as oxycodone.
Ekasala's lawyer said he has also been asked by federal agents to cooperate, but has repeatedly refused. He said Ekasala was "an extremely reluctant participant and was somewhat enamored of being friendly with or having contact with a professional athlete."
"My client was always sympathetic to Mr. Kaczur and suggested to him many times, as the text messages will show, that Kaczur ought not to be doing what he was doing. Professional athletes in this country are treated like royalty, and royalty sometimes abuses the people they come in contact with, and I think that's what happened to Ekasala."

I don't know exactly what happened here but it sure seems like he used his status as an NFL player to find a patsy to get him drugs. And then when the heat came (because of his own stupidity) he sold out his buddy. I'm not pitying a drug dealer but it sounds like this is a problem mostly of Kaczur's making but that Ekasala is going to get most of the punishment.

The Most Disturbing Video You'll See All Day

78 year old Angel Torres is crossing Park Street in Hartford, Connecticut when he gets mowed down. Watch carefully what happens, two cars, evidently chasing each other cross the double yellow line into the lane of oncoming traffic. The first car misses Torres, the second doesn't have time to react, and plows into him. Both cars take off and turn down a side street.
But what happens next is even more disturbing. He lays there for almost a minute before someone comes to help him. One driver actually made a U-turn rather than help out a fellow man.
There's a guy sprawled out in the street! Do something!

Torres is paralyzed from the neck down.
The driver who ran him over is still at large.
And the people who ignored him can't even be prosecuted under a Good Samaritan law.

Thursday, June 05, 2008

Are We Ready for a Black President?

Barack Obama and his wife Michelle brought the fist bump to the mainstream with their celebratory pound after he clinched the Democratic nomination.

Obama's fist bump

Here's the video version of it:

It should be known that Mrs. Poop and I always fist bump (but we do a 3-step top, bottom, bump version), because she finds it better than hugging or kissing me. We may have even bumped fists in the delivery room after Chase was born.

Respect the Man's Wishes

Ryan Church, being the fine, upstanding citizen that he is, offered to help the fiance of a crane operator who died in the crane collapse on Manhattan's Upper East Side.
But Janine Belcastro rejected Church's help because her fiance, Donald Leo was a Yankees fan.
"Don was a die-hard Yankee fan," Belcastro said in a statement. "It would not respect his memory if he accepted this."
But Belcastro said she "greatly appreciated" the offer.
Not surprisingly, Leo was from Staten Island.
Church says he'll find another charity.

I want to go on record right now to say I admire his stance. If I get killed in an accident I do not want Mrs. Poop accepting money from a Yankee, especially not Derek Jeter.

We Wuz Robbed

Two small retailers of baby products are suing Babies R Us for price-fixing. and Baby Club of America say manufacturers were coerced by Babies R Us to demand a price minimum for their products.
The companies claim they were selling high-end items at a significant discount until the manufacturers told them if they continued to sell the products too cheap they would be cut off.
And they claim it goes back to Babies R Us which threatened to stop selling the products from any company that didn't demand a price floor for its products.
Also, attorneys filed six federal consumer class-action cases alleging shoppers had to pay more for baby goods because of the actions of Babies "R" Us.
The manufacturers in questions are Britax, Kids Line, Medela, Babybjorn, Peg Perego and Maclaren USA.
Personally, I'm outraged because we spent so much freakin money at Babies R Us, for those bastards to be ripping us off.

Chase's Britax Cowmooflage car seat, probably jacked up by 20%

I Love Boobies...Most of the Time

I used to love boobs in all shapes and sizes.
But after seeing these pictures of Jennifer Hudson and Maxi Mounds, now I'm not so sure.

Jennier Hudson's boobs
Maxi Mounds's boobs - 36MMM

Rock War

Apparently there is a growing rivalry among competitive air guitarists and Guitar Hero enthusiasts.
The whole thing was made up by the Boston Herald, but they did fabricate some pretty good quotes.

“There is no rivalry between air guitar aficionados and the weaklings who play ‘Guitar Hero,’ ” sniffed returning Boston air guitar champ Erin McNally, who competes under the name McNallica. “They have a plastic toy with buttons. I can do so much more with my guitar than they can do. My high-note slaying solos - they can’t do that. They are limited in their rocking abilities.”

“Everyone hates mimes and that’s all they really are,” says Brian Shandra who builds his own Guitar Hero instruments.. “Rock ’n’ roll mimes.”

Air Guitar competitor Lee Becker says “we are performance artists. I don’t know how to play real guitar, but that’s not relevant to my air guitar greatness. I’ve been told that I have a rock star ass. I will be sporting a pair of tight jeans and I plan lots of pelvic thrusts and air humps.”

Wednesday, June 04, 2008

Tough Love or Too Much?

When California Highway Patrol Officer Eric Newbury visited El Camino High School on May 26, he had some bad news.
He told students that 17-year-old senior Brittany Bennett, editor of the school newspaper was killed by a drunk driver.
Newbury read a brief eulogy, placed a rose on Bennett's seat, then left the students, some in tears, to think about the death of their classmate.
Newbury went to several classrooms telling kids the same thing.
An hour later all the students were called to the football field and told the whole thing was a hoax. Bennett did not die, nor did any of the other students whose names Newbury used to make his hoax hit home.
Newbury said that if even one student thinks twice before driving drunk, the scare he put in the kids was worth it.
Some parents complained that the kids have been traumatized, Newbury says "what I'm doing is waking them up.
“If I sit there and lecture somebody in a nice way, it's going to go in one ear and out the other,” he said. “In today's world, where they have all sorts of gore and fantastic things that kids can access on the computer, if you want to compete with that, you have to jar them emotionally.
“I want them to be an emotional wreck. I don't want them to have to live through this for real.”
Newbury's father was killed by a drunk driver.
The program, titled “Every 15 Minutes,” was designed by Mothers Against Drunk Driving. Its title refers to the frequency in which a person somewhere in the country dies in an alcohol-related traffic accident.
More people die in traffic accidents each year than have died during the entire 5 years of the Iraq war.

Song of the Week

"Move On Up" - Curtis Mayfield
Possibly the greatest use of instruments in any song I've ever heard. I chose this particular live version because you get to see Curtis himself singing, in the Hague, of all places. And it's the complete version. The only problem with it is that the horns seem to have been replaced by a synthesizer or something. If you love brass sections, be sure to listen to the album version.

Of course that hack Kanye West sampled this song on "Touch the Sky."

Evidently ESPN Classic Doesn't Think Much of Mike Piazza Either

I watched the ESPN Classic tribute to Mike Piazza and I wasn't surprised at the games they picked, but surprised that those games weren't much of a tribute to Piazza.

First there was July 8, 2000, the day Piazza got hit in the head.
Then there was Game 2 of the 2000 World Series, the day Piazza got a bat thrown at him.
And finally, September 21, 2001, easily Mike Piazza's finest moment as a Met.

I really believe that Piazza was never the same after the beaning. And he never hit Clemens as well afterwards, nor did the Mets as a team. Entering that game Clemens was 1-4 with a 9.10 ERA against the Mets. Then he pitched gems in both those outings that year after the beaning. And I think throwing the bat was another attempt to intimidate Piazza. Piazza did homer in that game, as part of the futile 5-run comeback in the 9th inning, but that happened after Clemens left.
In the post-9/11 game Piazza had two doubles in addition to his game-winning homer.

That aside, I just wanted to make what I hope will be my final point about Piazza's career. I never hated Piazza the person, I hated Piazza the player, but mostly because he was so overrated by Mets fans. And also his inability to hit in the clutch.

By the time Piazza came to the Mets he was diminished as a player and by the time 2002 rolled around he was barely even good anymore.

For instance, looking at his top 5 seasons by OPS, 3 were with the Dodgers, 1 was with the Mets, and the other was the split season when the Mets got him for the last 4 months.

Looking at his top 5 seasons by MVP vote (that measures his relative strength compared to the rest of the league's best players), 4 of his top finishes were with the Dodgers, the other was with the Mets.

Four of his top 6 RBI seasons were with the Dodgers.

For the record, he played 5 seasons with the Dodgers and 7 1/2 with the Mets.

And that's my major problem, he was great for the Dodgers, very good for the Mets for 2 1/2 seasons, pretty good for a couple, and terrible by the end.

Let's See Someone Try This on Mrs. SCZA

Normally I don't mind when idiots interfere with local news broadcasters, most of the time the annoyance is minimal and the reaction is humungous. In this case it's the other way around. I can't believe Kathy Cheek kept her cool. Grabbing and kissing a woman without her permission is not cool. At least that's Mrs. Poop keeps telling me.

What to Get the Met Fan Who Has Everything

With Father's Day and some key birthdays coming up (Josh and Nails) I thought I might share some really cool gift ideas I saw on the Mets website.

There's an inflatable glove chair.

Mets inflatable glove chair

And there's also a grill designed to look like a beer keg.

Mets keg grill

Note: I do not want either of these items. Please, Mama Poop do not buy these things for me. I mean it.

Note: SCZA could have had both these items for roughly the same price as his Mr. Met cake.


Sameer Mishra won the 81st Annual Scripps National Spelling Bee by correctly spelling guerdon. But Sameer's road to the title was a bumpy one.

Let that be a lesson to you kids, a good sense of humor and a working knowledge of words of French etymology will get you far in life.

Tuesday, June 03, 2008

Holy Shit

A drunk driver apparently passed out behind the wheel and crashed into a bike race on a highway in Mexico, near the U.S. border.
One cyclist, from the U.S. was killed, 10 other riders were hurt.

bike crash

This picture is fuckin crazy, you can see people getting tossed in the air, shoes and helmets flying. This borracho must have been driving pretty fast to do this much damage and for the bike riders not to have seen him coming and have time to react.

One Ball, No Strikes

One ball may be all Marlins catcher Matt Treanor has left after taking this pitch off the stones.

I could listen to Harry Kalas talk about anything but he seems less than concerned about Treanor's pain.

And if Treanor needs to lay off his husbandly duties for a while, I'm sure TON would be happy to help out around the house.

Matt Treanor and Misty May

Monday, June 02, 2008

Baseball is Poop - 54 Game Stat Recap Edition

Can Chipper Jones Hit .400?
No, unless he plays the Mets everyday. Hitting .400 in this day and age is nearly impossible. Look at it this way, if you go 2 for 5 in every game and go 1 for 3 on the last day of the season, technically, that's below .400.
Over the weekend he already started to falter and he's 1 oh-fer game from being below .400.
Even so this is the longest into the season I can remember anyone taking a .400 average since Lenny Dykstra in 1990. Dykstra had one stretch where he went 4 for 25 and dropped his average 30 points. His last day above .400 was June 11. He finished the year at .325.
Even Tony Gwynn in 1994, when he batted .394 in the strike shortened season was never above .400 after May 15. But after April 26 his average was never lower than .376.
And the closest to .400 anyone ever got since Ted Williams (other than Gwynn in that short season) was George Brett in 1980. But that year Brett got off to a slow start, and even though he caught fire in July and August, his peak average was .407.

Look Out Denny McClain
With 10 wins in 12 starts Diamondbacks pitcher Brandon Webb has an outside shot at being the first pitcher to win 30 games since Denny McClain in 1968. First of all he would need to get 36 starts, which would require Arizona always skipping their 5th starter to keep him on schedule. And even so, if his losses and no decisions equal 5 for the rest of the season he'd have no chance. I think even winning 25 would be tough (15 wins in 23 or 24 starts) but if he can win 28, that would be the most since McClain.

Finish What You Start
The Toronto Blue Jays lead the majors in ERA, and NOT coincidentally, they lead the majors in complete games too. Six may not sound like much but it's twice as many as any other team, except the Indians. 8 teams have none. In fairness, Roy Halladay has 5 of those, including four in a row, but the rest of the guys pitch deep as well.
Jesse Litsch, Roy Halladay and Shaun Marcum are a combined 18-9 with a 2.90 ERA.

He's Not a Man, He's a Machine, An RBI Machine
Josh Hamilton has 63 RBI in 58 games, putting him on pace for 176 for a full season. The postwar record is 165 by Manny Ramirez in 1999. Hamilton has 5 games of 4 RBI or more, helped by 2 grand slams in 6 bases loaded at bats. He leads the AL in homers (by 1), RBI (by 15) and only trails in batting average by two points which means he could be gunning for the first triple crown since 1967.

Other Feats, Facts and Figures
Francisco Rodriguez is on pace for 59 saves. Bobby Thigpen holds the record with 57.
Lance Berkman is on pace for 159 runs, which would be the most since Jeff Bagwell scored 152 times in 2000. It would put him 5th since 1900.
Right now 8 players have an OPS over 1.000. Albert Pujols and Chase Utley are to be expected, and Lance Berkman and Chipper Jones can be understood, but Ryan Ludwick and Nate McLouth? Dan Uggla and Pat Burrell are the other 2.
Speaking of OPS, Adam Dunn and Josh Hamilton are almost identical in OPS. Dunn has the same homers in 66 fewer ABs. Plus he has 26 more walks.

Can You Hear Me Now?

I can't find a good closeup still picture of James Thompson's busted up ear so this one will have to do. This picture (I also put it in the other post) was taken after Kimbo Slice busted the ear open, and you can see him landing a solid blow, this is probably the uppercut that led the ref to step in.

James Thompson's cauliflower ear

Here's the best youtube clip I could find of the third round, the audio sync is off but it's pretty good quality, when the ref has Thompson up against the cage you can see how nasty the ear was. Unfortunately CBS didn't have the best angle of the shot that split the ear open.

Elite XC Gets Pretty Decent Ratings

From the New York Times:
CBS’s broadcast of the Elite XC mixed martial arts program Saturday night — the first on a broadcast network in prime time — generated a preliminary national rating of a 2.7, or an average of 4.3 million viewers. The viewership fell from the 5.9 million CBS generated this season for the crime series that usually run Saturday nights on the network. But the national rating covered the 9 to 11 p.m. Eastern time period and did not include the main event, won by Kimbo Slice over James Thompson. In Nielsen Media’s 54 metered markets, the rating peaked at a 4.7 from 11:30 to 11:45, when Slice fought.

The 9-11 p.m. portion finished first against CBS’s competition in young male and young adult demographics. Still, the 4.3 million viewers who watched the much-hyped Elite XC program fell short of the 5.9 million who watched the Rampage Jackson-Dan Henderson U.F.C. lightweight title fight on the Spike cable channel in September.

That actually seems like a pretty good rating, 4.7 in the quarter hour when the Kimbo fight aired. That's pretty good for that late on a Saturday night. I bet it would have been even better had the fight aired on time.
At least to me these don't seem like disastrous ratings that would encourage CBS to back out of the deal. But I'm sure a lot of the viewers were just curious and may not tune in again, leading to a sharp dropoff next time they host a card.
I think the next card on CBS will be Kimbo vs Brett "The Grim" Rogers, sometime in late August.

Sunday, June 01, 2008

Night at the Fights

The launch of EliteXC (at least on CBS) was a successful one (at least from my in arena perspective). Here's my recap of events (in chronological order, roughly) of the fights.

Since I don't know all that much about the techniques involved in MMA I'll leave that stuff out or just repeat what the fight doctor, TON told me.

We got there pretty early because we wanted to see the undercard/dark matches.

The crowd was pretty good, as you would expect it was mostly young men, in Tapout t-shirts, but it was pretty ethnically diverse and there were more women than I expected, and quite a few good looking ones.

We were really impressed with a 140 pounder named Wilson Reis. He's a jiu-jitsu guy who also appeared to have a pretty decent standup. He tried several submission holds before finally winning with a rear naked choke. He may be too small to ever make a name in UFC but he was really impressive and fun to watch. After his fight he came and joined some family members in the audience right in front of us. He enjoyed the rest of the fights while sitting on the stairs. And he kept taking pictures with people, posing with a fist aimed at their chin. I was going to ask if we could take a picture of him putting me in a rear naked choke, but I decided against it.

The next fight was one of the weirdest fights with a very disappointing ending. Nick Serra, brother of Matt fought, and basically gave up. I can't even really explain it, he jumped and landed on his back, then got up, got kicked in the leg, jumped again and never got up. It was ruled as TKO, apparently he said he could not continue.

The fight after that featured a quitter also. Carlos Moreno did not answer the bell for the second round after getting pounded by former Pittsburgh Steeler Carlton Haselrig.

A little bit before 9, when the CBS broadcast began, they announced that everyone could move down to fill up the lower levels. Evidently they only sold about 8,000 tickets, probably about half of the tickets available.

So everyone started making a mad dash down the steps to the lower bowl. Apparently they didn't alert arena security about this change because when we got down there an overwhelmed security guard was screaming into her walkie-talkie, "they're everywhere."

After that scramble we got pretty decent seats for the part of the card that would be televised live.

Brett "The Grim" Rogers came out to Busta Rhymes, live. Busta actually entered the cage and continued his performance while Rogers came out. Then Rogers knocked out John Murphy in the first round.

Murphy went to Syracuse University to play football but never quite made it, in a story that's too long to tell here.

Another quick knockout came from Joey Villasenor. He knocked out New York Bad Ass Phil Baroni who came out to an elaborate intro, then left in a cloud of shame. He used to be in the UFC but with a 10-10 record I can't see his MMA career going much further from here.

Then was the chick fight, Gina Carano vs. Kaitlin Young. In case you don't know, Carano is kind of hot. She was Crush on American Gladiators. And she can also fight a little. She landed a bunch of good shots, but also took some punishment before finishing off Young who was ruled medically unable to continue, after the 2nd round because of a nasty cut.

Carano didn't make weight, coming in 4 1/2 pounds over. Afterward she said she didn't really focus on her conditioning enough. She reportedly gave 12% of her purse to Young in order for Young to take the fight anyway.

The next fight was the worst of the night, but mostly because of the ending. Robbie Lawler and Scott Smith started off very slowly, not even touching each other for what seemed like an eternity. The bloodthirsty crowd even started to boo. But once these guys got going it was a pretty even fight. It was almost entirely standup with each guy landing a lot of good punches and even a few good kicks. Unfortunately late in the third round, Lawler poked Smith right in the eye. The fight was stopped for a doctor to check out Smith. After shining her light in the wrong eye, she eventually ruled that he couldn't continue. Smith afterward said he just wanted a few minutes, but once you tell the ring doctor you can't see, she's not going to let you get back in there and take more punches. The fight was ruled a no-contest, but the President of EliteXC immediately booked a rematch and said he would pay both fighters the winner's bonus. Smith admitted in his postfight interview that had the fight kept going he probably would have gotten knocked out, but he'd rather get knocked out than end in a no contest.

Finally we got to the main event, featuring internet legend Kimbo Slice. The place was a electric for Kimbo. Even though he's relatively new, the crowd was so into him. The atmosphere was really awesome, and that's the main reason I wanted to see this in person.

As far as the fight went, Kimbo displayed a lot of strengths and weaknesses, both. His ground game and his defense are a lot better than people might have thought, but he was still very vulnerable to the ground game. You could see that he would have killed James Thompson had they stayed up, but when he got to the ground Thompson dominated him. But Kimbo showed some incredible strength to basically push out of some holds.
I don't think he was expecting this fight to be as difficult as it was, nor was he conditioned enough to fight three rounds.
He was really getting his ass kicked at the end of the second round as Thompson had him down against the cage and was dropping elbows on him. It could definitely have been a stoppage but I think the ref held off because Kimbo was defending himself. He was moving his head and his arms to try to avoid the elbows, which I think was enough for the ref to keep the fight going. But Kimbo definitely got saved by the bell.

Kimbo was incredibly exhausted at this point, but he came out for round 3 and landed a bomb to Thompson's badly cauliflowered ear. The ear busted open then Kimbo landed a few more shots before the ref stopped it. I think the ref may have stopped it too soon because I don't think Thompson was out, nor do I think he couldn't have come back if the fight had gone on.

Kimbo Slice pounded James Thompson's cauliflower ear

Maybe some people will talk about a fix, but I don't think so. And some people were suggesting that CBS would throw a tomato can against Kimbo just so he could get a win on TV. But Thompson was anything but. He was taking incredible shots, employing a perfect strategy against Kimbo, and doing some damage of his own.

A couple of other notes: there were dancers around the lower level and on the walkway to the cage the whole time. They were definitely local strippers.

There was a small baby at the fight, and a few seconds after we noticed that, the baby's mother started breastfeeding. Definitely not something we expected to see at an MMA event.

The timing was a disaster for CBS and EliteXC. I can't believe they allowed it to go almost an hour over the allotted time, especially since there were a couple of quick knockouts. I have no idea what the fuck they were doing half the time.

A lot of people DVR these things, especially young men on Saturday nights, and even though that doesn't matter for the ratings, if you want people to get hooked on this, you can't alienate them. Plus the Kimbo fight was so awesome, reducing its audience is a horrible mistake.

Also I'm sure local CBS affiliates were not pleased about pushing back the late local news.

All in all I must say I really enjoyed myself at this event. Overall I give the experience a B+ because two fighters quit, and the last two fights had disappointing ends. But all of the 5 CBS fights were very entertaining, and I hope EliteXC puts on more cards and attracts some more talent.