Mrs. Poop's New Favorite Yankee

Now that Derek Jeter is moving on to make banging Swimsuit models his full time job, this leaves a void in Mrs. Poop's heart.
Who will be her favorite Yankee next season?
Answer: Masahiro Tanaka.

What did Tanaka do to endear himself to Mrs. Poop?
This is what he said when asked about the biggest cultural difference between Japan and the U.S.:

"The washlet is a system in Japan where you press a button and water comes out and washes your ass. Not having that is a big difference."