I Would Have Shot the Parents Too

The tragic death of Harambe the gorilla at the Cincinnati Zoo is the direct result of negligence by the parents of the child who ended up in the gorilla enclosure.

Yes accidents happen. Small children do things and go places they are not supposed to. But any good parent would have rounded up their child before they even thought of getting close enough to the gorilla enclosure to fall in.
As sad as I am about the death of the gorilla I feel the Zoo had no other choice. A tranquilizer dart wouldn't work fast enough on an animal that large. Entering the enclosure, even a trained professional could have frightened the animal.
They did what they could to do save the child's life. Now if they could only do something about his parents.

I Hope We Find Them a Nice Warm Jail

A bison calf had to be put down after a pair of tourists to Yellowstone National Park put the animal in their car because they thought he was cold.

The idiots took him away from his herd, and efforts to reunite him were unsuccessful and he had to be euthanized for his safety and the safety of others because he kept approaching people and cars.

The tourists, who are not American, say they found him alone, thought he was freezing and wanted to drive him to a park facility.

That's bullshit. I don't know if they wanted to take him home, or just have a good instagram picture of a bison calf in their rental car but everyone knows you don't fuck with nature.

The park rangers said the tourists thought they were caring for the animal. I am not forgiving. They should be prosecuted.

Who Looks Like Whom?

Chase on the left, Julian in the middle and Lincoln on the right. All pictures from 3-5 days after birth.

Brothers Don't Shake Hands

Definitely the best part of having a new baby is seeing how the big brothers are reacting.
The first night we had him home Chase said to me "I don't know why, but I just love him so much."
And we sometimes find Julian randomly sitting near Lincoln's seat or bassinet with his book or his iPad, just looking at him, being near him.

Mrs. Poop bought these shirts with their names on them, as a set, before we 100% decided on the name. Good thing we stuck with our first choice.

Song of the Week

"Keep You in Mind" - Guordan Banks
Love finding a good, lesser-known R&B/soul singer.

Never Gets Old

Here he is, Lincoln Diesel
Born 5/24/16 at 10:23 am
Weighing at 10 pounds 4 ounces and standing 21 and a quarter inches tall

Even though this is the third time we've done it, it doesn't get less exciting or less cool.
It may even be more fun because we have the added dimension of the big brothers and their excitement.
Also the nerves and fears you have with your first are basically gone by the time you get to number 3.
Plus, research shows third kids usually turn out the best.

Song of the Week

"The Name Game" - Shirley Ellis
Quite possibly, the worst and dumbest song that ever made Song of the Week. But if you listen, you may figure out why I chose it.

The Gnome Knows

I went to two Mets games last August and I learned something important at each:
On August 2nd, I learned that Julian loved Thor aka Noah Syndergaard.
On August 29th, I learned that if you wanted to get a promotional giveaway you need to get there early, or spend a lot of money to buy it on eBay.

As soon as we heard the Mets were giving away Noah Syndergaard-en Gnomes, we got our tickets.
We gave them the tickets for the 8th night of Hanukkah, so they had been looking forward to it almost as long, and perhaps much more excitedly, than to the arrival of their new brother.

Unfortunately, for the second straight time, a game I looked forward to all winter, became an inconvenience when the time was changed, this time from 7pm to 4pm.
That caused Mrs. Poop to have to miss the communion of her friend's daughter, Chase to miss the second tryout for travel baseball and it came into conflict with the final hours of Passover.

To avoid the traffic, parking fiasco of last year's Jesse Orosco bobblehead day, we left our house 4 hours and 20 minutes before game time.

We arrived at 12:15 for a 4:05 start, and had one hour and 50 minutes until the gates opened. We sat in the car, walked around the parking lot and got on line at the left field gate at 12:45. That's when a man came by and said this gate opens half an hour later than the main gate by Jackie Robinson Rotunda. Gnomes would still be given away, but we'd have half an hour less inside the stadium. So we relocated. At 1:05 PM, a full hour before the gates opened, the lines were so long that I almost doubted whether we would be among the first 15,000 to get them.

We did and the kids loved them.

Because our seats were in left field we watched batting practice along the wall on the Giants side of the field. Relief pitcher Derek Law made two enemies for life by not tossing the ball in his glove into the crowd.

Mrs. Poop was a trouper, toughing it out, from a seated position, at 36 weeks pregnant.

The game started off well, as the Mets scored 2 each in the first and second innings, but then deGrom game up 3 runs to make it close.

But Chase's burgeoning favorite Met (Michael Conforto) homered in the 5th, and Julian's favorite Met (Wilmer Flores -- they share a birthday and a tendency to cry on the field) homered in the 6th and the bullpen held on for a 6-5 win.

The enduring memory of this game will be the gnomes.

I offered the kids to keep one for their room, one in its box in the basement as a collectible, and sell the other 2 (they consistently sell for $80-$100 on eBay) but they the gnomes are way too cool to sell.

Note: One guy was walking the concourse before the game with a $10 bill offering to pay cash for the gnomes. People were laughing in his face.

Song of the Week

"Half on a Baby" - R. Kelly
"digging like a shovel, all the things you do"

I Hope Arsenio Hall has a Good Alibi

Police in suburban Chicago have put out a well-being check for Irish singer and musician Sinead O'Connor.
Wilmette police released a statement Monday saying O'Connor reportedly left the area for a bicycle ride at 6 a.m. Sunday and hasn't returned.
Sgt. Michael Robinson says a caller expressed concern for O'Connor's well-being.
Comedian Arsenio Hall sued O'Connor this month over a Facebook post in which she accused him of furnishing the late musician Prince with drugs.

UPDATE:
Police located her and she is safe.

Song of the Week

"Don't Mind" - Kent Jones
I'm not saying it's not stupid. I am saying it's catchy.
Konichiwa!

What Do You Give Me For? Heidi Cruz and Anna Gasteyer

What do you give me for Heidi Cruz and Anna Gasteyer?

The Beginning of the End

"Chalk it up to Swiss affluence. Voters here will decide next month whether all 8 million citizens and legal residents should be guaranteed a generous monthly income, something no country in the world has ever done.
On June 5, Swiss voters will weigh in on a radical proposal that would mandate the government to guarantee $2,600 a month tax-free to every adult citizen and legal resident, and $650 to each child.
The payment would be provided to everyone, regardless of work status, income level, or wealth. It is a benefit few countries can afford. But then, Switzerland is among the world's richest nations, with a per capita income of about $85,000, 40% higher than that in the USA."

This is going to happen. It is going to start in places like Switzerland, then move to places like Finland and Norway, then the UK and Canada and eventually to the U.S.
And when that happens we're done. Why would anyone ever work when a comfortable living wage is provided with no effort required.
Hopefully, I'll be long dead before they start paying everyone just to be alive.

Song of the Week

"7 Years" - Lukas Graham
I hate growing up, and songs about growing up make me sad. But this one stays with you.
But his father may have been a little demanding, telling him to find a wife at 11.

What Do You Give Me For? David Letterman And Sweaty Department Store Santa in the Offseason

What Do You Give Me For David Letterman And Sweaty Department Store Santa in the Offseason?

It's a trick. This is David Letterman. This is what he looks like now.

Song of the Week

"Am I Black Enough For You?" - Billy Paul
I only went with this one because his classic "Me and Mrs. Jones" (SOTW, 1/26/11) already earned this honor. This song was actually the next single released after his first smash hit and, its departure in sound and significance may have prevent Paul's career from really taking off.
Either way, Billy and Paul mourn the loss of Billy Paul, even though his real name was Paul Williams.

What Do You Give Me For? Ted Cruz and The Lady from Maury

What do you give me for Ted Cruz and Searcy Hayes, a guest on the Maury Povich Show?

The internet went nuts after an episode featuring Hayes aired, questioning which of man was the father of her baby, because some think she bears a striking resemblance to Presidential candidate, Texas Senator Ted Cruz.

And if you need to see more of Hayes before making your decision, good news, she's apparently going to make a sex tape.

Nazi vs. Jew Beer Pong

The town of Princeton, NJ is an uproar after a it was revealed that students at the local high school have a long standing tradition of playing a beer pong variant called Jews vs. Nazis.

The cups are set up on one side in a swastika shape, and a Jewish star on the other.
The Jew team can "Anne Frank" a cup, to hide it or take it away.
The Nazis can "Auschwitz" their opponents and force them to skip a round.

It's not clear if there is any true anti-Semitism here, Jewish students may even have been part of it.

But they are certainly guilty of not understanding the seriousness of World War II and the Holocaust.
Though they should be commended for their creativity, and at least a cursory understanding of history.

Doves Are Crying

Prince died Wednesday at the age of 57 under circumstances that are still unclear. We knew he was on a flight that had to be diverted because of a medical emergency. And we knew he spent a time in the hospital, reportedly for the flu, but we still don't know exactly what killed him.

Prince was an enigmatic figure, whether gender-bending or turning himself into a symbol, or litigiously enforcing his copyrights (which is why no youtube clips will accompany this post).

But there's little debate that he was a musical genius who could not only sing, but play several instruments as well, demonstrated here (in a youtube video I can show you) as he plays along with legendary guitarists for a version of "My Guitar Gently Weeps."

He was a big sports fan and always stayed true to his hometown teams, unlike other front-celebs, and he was often seen on TV and Vikings games.

He also always stayed true to his music, a true artist, always adapting to the times, going from 70s funk to 80s pop to 90s R&B and soul.

My favorite Prince songs are "I Wanna Be Your Lover" (SOTW, 3/28/12), "Call My Name", "Adore" & "7."

Prayers For Pearl

Syracuse legend Dwayne "Pearl" Washington died Tuesday after a battle with brain cancer. Pearl was 52.

You saw this year's team wearing shirts bearing his name during their surprising run to the Final Four, as part of the fundraising effort to pay for his medical care.

He played for Syracuse from 1983-1986 and was the first real star the school had. His battles with Patrick Ewing and Georgetown were part of what helped build the Big East into the best conference in the country.

It was Pearl who helped blaze the trail of top recruits like Rony Seikaly, Sherman Douglas, Derrick Coleman and Billy Owens to make their way to cold, snowy Syracuse to play for a curmudgeonly coach.

He never reached his potential in the NBA, playing only three years of the Nets and Heat.

It was with the Nets that Pearl played alongside Duane Washington and due to their similar names, they were often confused.
People thought Pearl had a drug problem, but that was Duane.
In fact, ESPN.com ran a picture of Duane with the article announcing Pearl's death.

Even though he never had the pro career he wanted he was always remembered fondly at Syracuse, and became a fixture around the program.

I saw him once at the bookstore, Dick Vitale was doing a book-signing there ahead of broadcasting a Big Monday game, and Pearl walked in. Vitale stopped his canned speech about young people and began to talk about Pearl as a player and as a person. I skipped class that day.